michele bachmann

The Tea Party finally noticed that it turned five like a week and a half ago, so what could these insurgent grassroots heartland Willy Lomans do but get together with a bunch of Senators and millionaires in Washington DC to celebrate? Michelle Cottle of the Daily Beast was there, gulping the very same air as […]

Could it be that Michele Bachmann has been visiting Jan Brewer’s medicine cabinet? As we noted in our year-end review, the Arizona governor actually said and did some pretty sane stuff in the last year; now it almost looks as if several other prominent teabaggers are engaged in similar flirtations with reality. Just look at […]

Congressional Legion of Doom members Louie Gohmert, Michele Bachmann, and Steve King appeared on a panel at the Heritage Foundation Wednesday and somehow, Gohmert managed to out-stupid both other members of the trio. Oh, sure, Bachmann warned that Barack Obama’s legacy would be “the establishment of lawlessness in the United States,” because gay marriage (apparently […]

Remember back in 2012 when Republicans were all, like, “Heyyyyyyyyyy ladies,” and the ladies were all, like, “Fuck you, assholes,” and did not vote for Republicans because they are Republicans and also assholes? (But we repeat ourselves.) So since it’s a day that ends in “y,” Republicans have a shinier newer plan to make the […]

While 2013 certainly kept all the womyn busy in the kitchen baking shitmuffins, there were some bright and awesome spots where legislators on the national stage groped around to find long-lost sets of (gender-neutral) testicles and stood up for everything that is right and just in this world. In order to honor those men and […]

Like most years when there’s a Democrat in the White House, 2013 was a year of things getting rammed, crammed, jammed, shoved, and/or forced down our (America’s) throats. How big were the things? So big. Were they hard to swallow? Oh yes. But somehow, freedom will endure, we guess. Here is a list of 13 […]

You gotta hand it to good old sad old Marcus Bachmann. He takes a licking (ewww now we have that image in our head and we HATE us) and keeps on ticking. After the homosexxicans at Truth Wins Out went all undercover-like and found out what we all knew – that Marcus’ “counseling” services was […]

Tuesday was another great day for casually talking about how the heck to impeach the president for something something presidenting while black something. But then, isn’t every day? Of course! But Tuesday was extra special, as a who’s who of congressional derp held a hearing cleverly titled “The President’s Constitutional Duty to Faithfully Execute the […]

Things are scary out there, you guys. Obamacare has racked up another victim! And this one isn’t just some simple simpleton weeping about losing her insurance that only pays the first $50 for those rare services it actually decides to cover. This is one of our nation’s finest, a leader among men and women, a […]

This has been a fun couple of days, what with watching the Cephalopod caucus in Congress run shrieking from the Affordable Care Act and dulling the pain by driving nails through our testicles and all. So you’ll forgive us if we missed the news that a few of the walking yeast infections on the Republican […]

Aw yeah, it’s that time again folks. The end times, you hear? Time to get right with the Lord and take stock of your personal relationship with Jesus Christ, because the apocalypse trend is back again, hotter than hell-fire. And the fervent calls to immenantize the eschaton are being led this time by what has […]

Poor Michele Bachmann needs a hug. She called the reopening of the federal government after a two week shutdown “a very sad day,” because mean old Barack Obama “got 100 percent of what he wanted” — you know, a functioning government, and no worldwide economic meltdown due to a debt default. We ask you, is […]

Omnipotent omnipresent omniscient Miley Cyrus showed up on “Saturday Night Live” on, well, Saturday as both musical guest and special guest star. Ladies and gentlemen, please start your engines to discuss any of the following: 1) SNL sucks now and no one should ever watch it. 2) Justin Timberlake is the only person that should […]

The good folks at Michelle Malkin’s Home for Aggrieved Aggregators have made a shocking discovery! House Republicans did not shut down the park service, and in particular did not shut down the World War II Memorial on the National Mall. Turns out the orders to shut out WWII vets came directly from Barack Obama himself! […]

Attention, America! Michele Bachmann has taken a close look at Barack “Tha Ghetto Gangsta” Obama and has figured out what his nefarious plan for America is — he wants to get us sucking on the crack pipe of government dependency! And you know how Americans are: once they slip into the “Blue Cross Haze” of […]