Wonkette

• Page Six: Donald Trump defends the biggest, swankiest flag ever [NYP]
• Cindy Adams: Cindy predicts Michael Ripoff’s demise. [NYP]
• Liz Smith: Anthony Kennedy whoops it up with Lally Weymouth. [NYP]
• The Reliable Source: Hillary Duff, Nicollette Sheridan and Michael Bolton spotted in the area. [WP]
• Lloyd Grove’s Lowdown: Will Bloomberg run for President? Signs point to… maybe! [NYDN]

• Reliable Source: First daughter Jenna Bush is popular with her students… Dick Cheney dodges questions about his daughter Mary Cheney’s new book. [WP]

• Lloyd Grove’s Lowdown: Anderson Cooper faces the challenges of his increased fame. [NYDN]
• Rush & Molloy: Rev. Al Sharpton is upset at Hillary, because Clintonistas Howard Wolfson and Gigi Georges are working against his favored congressional candidates. [NYDN]
• Page Six: Bill Clinton is worried that New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg might run for president as a third-party candidate, spending $300 million of his own money, and siphoning votes away from Hillary. [NYP]

When you cover politics, there’s no such thing as too much Hillary. Here’s an amusing (if slightly overlong) video of Hillary, from the New York LCA dinner, in which she assumes the role of her Madam Tussaud’s wax figure: MORE »

* Reliable Source: Laura Bush dropped two sizes after a year of private fitness classes; she works out three times a week at 8 a.m. [WP]
* Rush & Molloy: Bloomberg, David Remnick, Bob Schieffer, Lesley Stahl, Kurt Andersen, Richard Holbrooke, and Ron Silver attended Joe Klein’s New York book party. . . Actor Dennis Hopper defends Bush. [NYDN]
* Page Six: Cheney was accidentally shot on a hunting trip in the late ’90s. . . Emails from Aaron Sorkin to call girl are revealed in her new book. [NYP]

• Reliable Source: Collection of Majorie Williams‘ writings and reflections on life is published. . . Malcolm-Jamal Warner and Jessica Biel spotted in town. [WP]
• Page Six: Chelsea Clinton mislead The New York Post about her breakup with Ian Klaus; she is now dating childhood-friend Marc Mezvinsky, the son of two former lawmakers. [NYP]
• Rush & Molloy: Bloomberg on running for president: “Are you insane?” [NYDN]
• Liz Smith: Lewinsky is doing her London School of Economics thesis on the effects of drinking too much. [NYP]

If every campaign were a mayoral election in a historically liberal city, Republicans would be so kicking ass right now. First, Bloomberg crushes the

NYC Democratic mayoral candidate Fernando Ferrer has clearly decided go down in flames. Or flamers. His newest ad features an animated Mayor Bloomberg riding a horse in the lap of George Bush.Then, in the words of the New York Post,

Bloomberg’s right hand, which holds a wad of cash, moves up and down in a rhythmic motion below Bush’s belt, as a grin crosses the president’s face, and his arms and legs quiver momentarily.” Ah, yes, the money shot. Bloomberg’s campaign alleges that the “commercial clearly shows the mayor performing a sex act on Bush.

Over the pants? Muffled by a bunch of bills? Some sex act. Maybe in the “new” Times Square. Around here, there needs to be penetration of some kind. Preferably into the wallet. MORE »

The New York Daily News is reporting that people who can afford door-to-door car service were given advance warning not to ride the subway last week. (Meanwhile, the Post has scooped that all Jews were mysteriously told to stay home from work today… Developing.) MORE »

Yeah, yeah. Our last line of defense in channeling cosmopolitan agita to its plausibly blamable source, the New York Times, says that Bloomberg did the right thing, even if it was a major migraine for weekend subwaygoers. And even if the terror alert was one giant soup-to-nuts hornswoggle: MORE »

So the Island is still in one piece, despite multiple Bloombergian warnings to the contrary. (Not to mention that rare occurrence when the “You must chill” declamations come from Washington.) But has this stopped local political bickering and accusations of tails wagging dogs? Of course not. MORE »