Tag Archives: memes

  Glad we solved that problem forever

2014: The Year All Rape Ended Forever Because It Never Existed Obviously

Our thoughts exactly
In the early days of 2014, the world was a simpler, happier place. Bill Cosby was still a kindly, grandfatherly funnyman and not a horrible monster rapist, and we all enjoyed playfully teasing him about his sweaters and Jell-O Pudding Pops until the joke was entirely played out and stale and not funny anymore, seriously, enough. Read more on 2014: The Year All Rape Ended Forever Because It Never Existed Obviously…
  what if?

What If It Was All A Dream?

Satire is hard! Satire is particularly hard if you’re unconscious! So, I had this great idea for a “What If?” column: make fun of that hot new Republican thing where they post pictures of cats holding signs with conservative platitudes on the Twitters and the Facebooks. You know, like Michelle Obama holding that “Bring Back Our Girls” sign? “What if,” I wondered, “Republicans were better at using cat memes?” Because that shit is soooo stupid, right? And so off I went, merrily making “hilarious” GOP cat meme pictures and thinking how clever and smart I was. And then I started type, type, typing here at Yr Wonkette, breaking only to pat myself on the back and congratulate myself on SUCH a great idea. And then it was time to add links and… well, that’s when everything went south. Join me after the jump to feel really embarrassed for me. Read more on What If It Was All A Dream?…
  dunder man

Worst Psychiatrist Ever Wants Drug Warnings On Facebook Because ‘Slender Man’ Makes Kids Stabby

We had been staying away from the awful story about the two 12-year-old Wisconsin girls who stabbed a schoolmate of the same age, supposedly under the influence of online horror stories about a fictional character named Slender Man (or Slenderman — both are used), because yecch. The good news is that the victim survived and has been released from the hospital; her attackers have been charged as adults, with attempted murder. But now we have to mention it, because Dr. Keith Ablow, the world’s worst psychiatrist, has weighed in on the case, and he wants to know just why the Surgeon General isn’t requiring warnings on Facebook and maybe the YouTubes, because scary ghost stories are clearly causing children to take knives and attack other children. In a completely unrelated story, “Dr.” Ablow also explained, based on no information at all, that the school shooting in Oregon this morning was the result of untreated mental illness, and had nothing to do with the easy availability of guns. Read more on Worst Psychiatrist Ever Wants Drug Warnings On Facebook Because ‘Slender Man’ Makes Kids Stabby…
  the stars at night are big and bright

Ted Cruz’s Insane Jihad On U.S. Government Totally Validated By This One Meme He Saw

Senior Canadiano El Senator Ted Cruz has gotten a little guff. From his colleagues, from the American people, from that mean old Andrea Mitchell. But he has stood firm! He has stood firm in fighting for … well, nobody is sure anymore. Like, at first it was against Obamacare, but then everybody was like dudes we hate you for shutting the government down over Obamacare, so then they changed it to “we don’t even know what we want,” which, points for self-awareness. And then there was some stuff about how it was about “spending” and “the debt,” which is so self-evidently insane that they may have shut up about it by now? We are not sure. Now it is about “entitlements,” maybe? But Ted Cruz is still fighting that one good fight against Obamacare, and its terrible no good very bad website. Which makes the government shutdown — and possible worldwide depression once we breach that bad ol’ debt ceiling — totally worth it. But here’s a question, and we are not Ezra Klein, so we do not know the answer to this, maybe someone can help us out? Read more on Ted Cruz’s Insane Jihad On U.S. Government Totally Validated By This One Meme He Saw…
  May All Your Memes Come True

Internet Wants To Buy Old Handsome Joe Biden A Trans Am For Teh Lulz, Charity

You know that one Onion story that’s nearly mandatory in any discussion of the general awesomeness of Old Handsome Joe Biden, right? (Frankly, we doubt we even needed to link to it, but it’s a habit by now.) You probably also know that Biden knows about the meme, and thinks it’s “hilarious,” right? You might even know that Joe Biden is something of a motorhead in real life, and owns a 1967 Corvette that the Secret Service won’t let him drive — “It’s the one thing I hate about this job. I’m serious.” So now, some goofballs from Fark have started a campaign to buy Joe Biden an actual white Trans Am like the one in the Onion piece, for the Lulz. Read more on Internet Wants To Buy Old Handsome Joe Biden A Trans Am For Teh Lulz, Charity…
  phriday phun photo phost

A Children’s Treasury of Mr. Spock Being Unimpressed With U.S. Politics

Oh hooray, there is a new Internet Meme, just in time to Make the Internet Laugh Again, during this era of gloom and strife and unspeakable bullshit. Mr. Spock is a demon from the not-actually-popular television melodrama Star Trek, which was a cultural contemporary of the Sid & Marty Kroft show H.R. Pufnstuf and The Velvet Underground and Nico and the comeback presidential campaign of Richard Nixon. It was a time just like now, but without anything memorable. That’s why what we have instead of creative culture in the 2010s (social media) has a new fad starring Spock looking unimpressed with whatever anybody is doing — especially Boehner and Obama and the rest of these Captains of the Titanic. Read more on A Children’s Treasury of Mr. Spock Being Unimpressed With U.S. Politics…
  why did you have to leave us pagels?

The Basil Marceaux Has Become SELF-AWARE, Is No Longer That Fun

Since we introduced you to your 2010 election boyfriend, Basil Marceaux, the man and his opposition to traffic-stop slavery have achieved virulence here on the Internets. Basil’s infamous local news broadcast introduction to voters has shown up and been laughed about on teevee shows as well. But the problem is that, despite his seeming avoidance of sanity and spelling and grammar norms, Basil is aware that he is now Internet-famous and is now looking to capitalize on it. Basil needs to put on a brave face and go back to being 100% crazy, because right now he may be JUMPING THE SHARK. Read more on The Basil Marceaux Has Become SELF-AWARE, Is No Longer That Fun…
  just delightful

New Michael Steele ‘The Streets And Their Environs’ Catchphrase Right On Cue

Michael Steele! Just minutes ago, your Wonkette Editor urged David Simon to write Michael Steele some more material already, and look! Today on Today, Meredith Viera’s like, “You should have been fired, multiple times a day, every day, for the past year or so. Talk to me about this.” Michael Steele responds: “Brother still here.” IT’S JUST LIKE A REALIST NOVEL. Twelve Emmys for Michael Steele. (One Daytime Emmy for tipster “John M.”) [YouTube] Read more on New Michael Steele ‘The Streets And Their Environs’ Catchphrase Right On Cue…
  the executioner's facebook is always well hidden

Barack Obama Loving This New Facebook Fad

[HEY KEN why do you HATE ME? — A Colleague] [Because I wrote my version 12 hours ago and you should have maybe seen it scheduled to post since last night? — A Supervisor] Guess who jumped on the “Facebook status-update health-care thing” pretty quick? That’s right, Barack Obama is thrilled to see that educated money-having Facebook internet people are putting the do-gooder thing on their Facebooks. [Thanks to “Noam L.” for the tip!] Read more on Barack Obama Loving This New Facebook Fad…
  wear purple for pete

Everyone Pray For Pete Hoekstra’s Safety In Iran

Are there many things less funny than hot new memes rife with LOLcat spin-offs? Well, this one, “Pete Hoekstra is a Meme” — based on this tragic war tale — is pretty funny, and should be for the next seven hours or so. Anyway, some of you have asked for an Iran open thread, about (the start of) the Khamenei crackdown, so consider this it. Hopefully everyone in Iran and on Twitter stays safe. Fuck bad people. Read more on Everyone Pray For Pete Hoekstra’s Safety In Iran…
  not as hot as cheney

Sarah Palin’s Unknown Quality Sparks Tragic Internet Meme

John McCain made a vice presidential choice, but no one knows her? Time to establish a complete waste-of-time TWITTER MEME in which one may use other INTERNET MEME JOKES to describe her. This is the most important Internet development since TUMBLR. Oh who are we kidding. We’re still getting over the lack of Mittens on this ticket, and it’ll take some time. [Twitter] Read more on Sarah Palin’s Unknown Quality Sparks Tragic Internet Meme…
  the devil's work

Ted ‘Tubes’ Stevens Explains His New Internet For Us

Corrupt Alaskan Sen. Ted Stevens, the old hack whose limited understanding of the Internet as a “series of tubes” launched a soul-crushing meme, has redesigned his Internet web site! And he’s sent out a release about the changes that we found funny, but probably only because, you know, he’s Ted Stevens and he’s writing about the Internet again. For example: “Online communities – We now have a presence on YouTube, Flickr (photo sharing site), and MySpace in addition to the Facebook page we have had. You can become a friend or subscriber to these pages and this will allow you to stay in touch with the campaign in a whole new way. Links to all of these sites are located on the front page of the website.” OK, you tell us Flickr is for photo sharing, but what in the hell are YouTube, MySpace and the Facebook?? [Ted Stevens] Read more on Ted ‘Tubes’ Stevens Explains His New Internet For Us…
  hey it's that thing i know about

‘I Am Aware Of All Internet Traditions’

Need a new Internet Slogan now that all your other old, worn-out slogans were used up by Weezer or immigrants? Here is one for you, only a day old and still pretty much used up like Krusty’s porn: I am aware of all Internet Traditions. What the hell? We will tell you, and you’ll feel dumber for it. Read more on ‘I Am Aware Of All Internet Traditions’…
 

‘Yes, We Can’ Parodies Better Than ‘Yes, We Can’

Finally, people are mocking that “Yes, We Can” internet sensation video, a.k.a. the most compelling reason thus far not to vote for Barack Obama. After the jump, two somewhat funny parodies involving John “WALNUTS!” McCain. See, if they’re parodies, they also support Barack Obama, but in a less grating way than “Yes, We Can” does! This parody concept is brilliant. Read more on ‘Yes, We Can’ Parodies Better Than ‘Yes, We Can’…