Everyone was so mean to Meghan McCain at the White House Correspondents Dinner, it says in the papers! Oh my. Meghan wanted to bring all her girlfriends in so they could be gettin’ that drink on, grindin’ up against Mark’s Penn’s leg, woot woot, Meghan just being Meghan, right? But then they only gave her two tickets, right? And she needed three, right? If only those security slaves knew that she was a columnist for a little thing called UMM THE DAILY BEAST, then they wouldn’t be gettin’ all up in her grill. Right? MORE »

Nah, we’ve read the whole thing, and there’s nothing dirty. Tricksy tricksy Meghan! The column’s called “The GOP Doesn’t Understand Sex” and it’s like, for serious, what is up with the GOP totally not ever talking about sex? What is up with that dudes? But she’s Meghan McCain and she don’t censor nothin’, she’ll write about sex (vaguely) all day long; can you hatin’ bitches even handle that? MORE »

Her whole life she’d wondered. How could she, a lively and high-spirited young woman, possibly be the child of a deeply depressed and profoundly lifeless pill addict like her so-called mother? She thought she might have the answer now … MORE »

New York. The Big Apple.

Beautiful young Meg McCabe finally had the city at her feet. As the guest host of “The Look,” she’d finally have the chance to deliver some straight talk — to the women of America, and also to the uptown media elites who’d long ago written her off. Uncensored, off the cuff — who knew what could happen on this explosive discussion show anchored by the legendary reporting doyenne Daphne Waters, an aging beauty who had long ago engaged in a passionate affair with Meg’s own father?

Stay tuned, ladies and germs! Your Wonkette will liveblog this crap until it gets boring … say, 15 minutes in? [The View]

Hey we solved a mystery, maybe! In her infamous Twitter Rant, Meghan McCain cites “a particularly nasty comment from a person I won’t say how but I indirectly work with questioning if I have ever worked.” Blah blah blah WHAT? (Just read it a few times and it will vaguely resemble English.) So who is this secret meany? He would have written something for the Daily Beast (freelancing = “indirectly working with”)… why it must be prominent young communist MATT YGLESIAS, YES? MORE »

Whoa hey it’s Meghan McCain goin’ nuts on Twitter! It seems that a “co-worker” of hers at Tina Brown’s Death Lion has been talking SHIT about her and how she’s never had a job before, something your Wonkette had never considered until now (PSST search “meghan mccain” “unemployed”). This led Meghan to a churn out a 9-twat-long rant listing every job she’s ever had, because UMM OMG she’s the most employed person ever, bitch? She then SCRUBBED this thing entirely — because it was insane — but someone had already e-mailed us the page, which was probably her plan in the first place. MORE »

Tina Brown’s Internet Tendency, Cthulhu du Jour, continues to pay Meghan McCain a few dollars to write what is starting to sound like some fading newspaper’s “youth columnist.” It is dismal. And today, it’s just some used-up “Whoa Karl Rove is on Twitter” waste product, which even your Wonkette got tired of back in January, when George W. Bush was still president. MORE »

EXCITING NEW PROFILE OF THAT CONGRESSMAN MEGHAN McCAIN WANTED TO BONE: “Schock is ardently opposed to abortion and gay marriage—and he’s got the requisite scorn for Big Government. … Once you get past the likes and mans and you knows, the future of the GOP doesn’t sound all that different from the past.” Sexy! [Details]

Gather ye rosebuds, everyone, it is time to play a game! It is the popular children’s schoolyard game of “Fuck, Marry, Kill.” Oh yes. We’ll be considering three different zeitgeist-y people each week and dissecting their merits by applying to their persons one of the given Verbs. Those are, just to re-cap, Fuck, Marry and Kill—if you need to write this down, please grab a pen and paper now because the pace of play is just going to increase from here. It is fairly self-explanatory but there are important rules that are absolutely crucial to establish right now, before anyone gets emotionally involved.
MORE »

America’s barely-remembered poor little rich girl got herself a book deal, through her dad’s agent! You can’t call Meghan McCain “chronically unemployed” anymore, or at least not until next year. But what will our nation’s confused, tattooed spinster write about, in her book? We have a few clues. MORE »

It is the political news of the century, and the New York Observer has WON THE AFTERNOON: “Meghan McCain’s Book Sold to Hyperion For High Six Figures.” Yup! Somehow her insanely terrible Daily Beast/cable news media sojourn has worked, and now she is rich as the dickens, all over again. So what’s the book about? Will it be like her columns? “Umm Hey Government Guys? This Ahmad Chalabi Dude Is Totes Lying To You?” MORE »