Tag: meg whitman

Welcome To The Third (And Last Ever?) Presidential Debate!

Ready, set, TRUMP CLINTON DEBATE LIVEBLOOG!

Time To Watch Trump And Hillz Fight Each Other TO THE DEATH! Your Final Debate Preview

Our long national nightmare is almost over!
Never gets old. The picture, we mean.

Is George W. Bush In The Tank For Crooked Hillary Clinton? We Are Just Asking.

Dubya talked some smack about Donald Trump at a fundraiser, without even saying Trump's name. Does this mean he is #ImWithHer? MAYBE.

New Hampshire Paper Regrets Endorsing Chris Christie, Must Have Been Drunk

Sometimes you do really stupid stuff that seemed like a great idea at the time, but you come to regret: falling in love with a psycho who never returns your black T-shirt, getting a tattoo under your navel that...
Maybe the demon sheep did it

Hewlett-Packard Laying Off 30,000 Workers, AKA Pulling A Carly

This is a tad awkward. On the very same day that Hewlett-Packard's former Dame of Destruction graduates to the grown-ups' debate table -- not that it has anything at all to do with wanting to put a girl on...

Veepstakes! Romney Hero Meg Whitman Out-Bains Bain Capital, Slashes 27,000 Jobs At HP

Why can't Californians have nice things? Because the "Golden Dream by the Sea" was all yeah eat me when HP CEO Meg Whitman tried to save it from itself the same way she has saved Hewlett Packard! What is...

Stocks Collapse Worldwide On News About Meg Whitman

Unloved corporate failure Meg Whitman was last seen insisting that she should be governor of California because goddammit, she paid $141 million to be governor of California. And now the former eBay executive has re-appeared on the public stage,...

Meg Whitman Now Hoping To Piss Away $$$ By Losing To Feinstein

Remember Meg Whitman, the poor little rich girl who got savagely trounced when Jerry Brown came out of his meditative trance one day, late in the election year, and said, "Oh yeah, I used to be California's governor. I...

Liveblogging Part VI: Californication … Jerry Brown Is Governor Again

With polls closed in the bankrupt republic of California, ABC 7 in Los Angeles is bravely sticking to Dancing With the Stars. Everything about tonight is fantastic. But what about the "Year of the Billionaire Woman," that thing we...

Teary-Eyed Meg Whitman Would Gladly Deport Former Housekeeper

Meg Whitman has finally realized that she can't buy the Governorship of California on eBay -- which really sucks for her, because she has already spent hundreds of millions of her own dollars trying to do exactly that! So...

Carly Fiorina In Hospital, Meg Whitman Concedes To Governor Brown

Let's check in with our California Bureau to see what's going on with all the hawt governor races and Senate races and the Marijuana Legalize It law and other such concerns in the world's fifth sixth seventh ninth tenth...

Dancing With the Stars: Insidious Mind Control?

McDonald's was SECRETLY Halal for a day or two, which infuriated the Teabaggers because they paid for PIG-anus, goddamnit, not some disgusting Sharia meat. Science proves that Moses used miracle wind-power, just like Captain Planet, to part the Red...

What a Drag It Is Getting Old

By the Comics CurmudgeonRemember when we elected a young, handsome president? This was a whole 23 months ago, so obviously the sweet blush of youth is long gone from the man's face, replaced by a sort of tired,...

Meg Whitman’s Illegal Mexican Housekeeper Was Illegal, Mexican

Gloria Allred, one of those high-profile controversial lawyer people, shoved Meg Whitman's former illegal immigrant housekeeper into the limelight today, because now is a pretty good time to do that. Nicky Diaz–Santillan worked for Whitman for nine illegal years,...

Liveblogging the Jerry Brown-Meg Whitman Heat-Wave Death Match

Should we liveblog the Jerry v. Meg death match? Well, we just held an election on Twitter and we won with 99.7% of the vote! So join us at 6PM California Death-Heat Time for the California Gov Debate, starring...

Today In Rudeness: Meg Whitman Says Fresno Looks Like Detroit

When will Meg Whitman apologize for saying insensitive things about Fresno? Republican gubernatorial candidate Meg Whitman on Tuesday told the San Jose Mercury News editorial board that "Fresno looks like Detroit. It's awful."