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Our thrilling write-up is after the jump.

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• George Allen and Jim Webb “meet” Tim Russert. Divided on Iraq policy and footwear choice, they share hatred of French, love of chaw. [WP, NYT]

• Project “BioShield” supposed to build stockpiles of vaccines, so far has only made headaches. [NYT]
• National security adviser Stephen Hadley spent Sunday answering questions on TV, admitted, “Nobody knows what humiliating treatment is.” [USAT]
• DHS soliciting proposals for technology based border security solutions, everything short of “giant death-ray” being considered. [WP]
• Pope puts 14th-century Byzantine emperor’s foot in his mouth, issues “my bad” to Islamic world. [WP, WP]
• Sweden votes out Socialist government, elects new center-right prime minister, who would still be considered far-left in US. [NYT]

This Sunday’s shows undertook a major military operation. Between the anniversary of the invasion of Iraq and “Operation Swarmer,” talking heads all but saluted. Russ Feingold managed to grab some of the spotlight, and his motion to censure President Bush gave Bill Kristol another chance to rock Chris Wallace’s world: Feingold “is smarter than the Democratic congressional leadership” and “deserves credit for taking a principled stand, and I honestly think he’s winning this debate.” That sound you heard is Nancy Pelosi’s head exploding. Dick Cheney did “Face the Nation” but did not make much news beyond the world’s most awesome Freudian slip: “Most of my predecessors spent a good part of their time as President–Vice President running for President.

Also, debuting this week on ABCNews.com was “The Green Room,” a brave attempt to wring every possible bit of hot air from the “This Week” panel while they stand around uncomfortably after the show wraps in the nondescript, motel-ish decor of ABC’s DeSale St. digs. Personally, I have always found pre-show green room chatter more interesting (everyone’s trying out their lines) and the whole thing strikes me as an empty attempt to show us another side of people who are basically one-dimensional, but I applaud this Taylorite approach to news content and hope that less practiced pundits do something stupid and/or inspired backstage in the future.

Top topics: Iraq, Feingold’s censure motion and by extension the NSA wiretap program.

One-hit wonders: Boston College’s Sweet Sixteen chances (”Meet the Press”); Joey Cheek, humanitarian (”This Week”); Mark McClellan, TREKKIE (”Fox News Sunday”)

Quotes to live by:
• Dick Cheney admits that shooting someone in the face is “one of those situations that’s difficult, that generates controversy.”
• Chris Wallace, SUPER GENIUS: “It seems to me that the Senators who are most critical of [the NSA wiretapping] program are the ones who know the least about it.”
• George Will lays it out: “We need to define victory down.”
• Sam Donaldson is totally high: “Russ Feingold threw the long ball… but it might connect, as the Washington Redskins learned in the mid-70s.”

Also, Shorter Chris Matthews Show: David Gregory observed that “George Bush is the George Clooney of Washington… but that’s a little bit of a patina.” Wha?

Full rundown appears after the jump.

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Editors’ note: Don’t miss Ana Marie Cox’s Washington Post live chat, starting today at 11:30 AM. You can access it here, where you can also find a link for submitting questions to the Original Wonkette about BlackBerry disaster averted. Happy chatting!

Chatology this week slightly enlivened by the appearance of Stephen Colbert, though it was offset by Chairman of Joint Chiefs Peter Pace doing a half-Ginsburg; he has the kind of whispery monotone that made us fall asleep during filmstrips in health class. Most notable segment: Bill Kristol channeling Arianna Huffington in his disappointment in the administration, causing massive freakout on the Fox set and Chris Wallace to utter the Quote of the Week: “My whole universe has been rocked.”

Top topics: Potential (or ongoing?) civil war in Iraq; Katrina tapes; Dubai port deal.

One hit wonders: Two hits for the criminal investigation into Pat Tillman’s death (MTP and FNS); Oscar talk on “This Week”

Quotes to live by:
• Stephen Colbert on his Oscar expectation: “a lot of jokes [about] abortion… it’s a funny word, like guacamole.”
• Peter Pace moderates his view on Iraq: “I wouldn’t put a great big smiley face on it.”
• Juan Williams on DHS/FEMA infighting: “I’m going to put that off to two big boys having something in the back yard.” Well, someone saw “Brokeback Mountain.”

Full coverage continues after the jump.

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This week’s Chatology is abbreviated due to illness on the part of the author and TOTAL FUCKING LACK OF NEWS. You thought circle jerking to the tune of “Cheney’s Got a Gun” was boring — at least people could feign some kind of disagreement over it. The Port World of Dubai deal sets up a debate between those who think the deal should definitely go through and those who think that it should go through after 45 days. Mean people suck. Ice cream is good. Also, Joe Biden was on.

Full rundown and highlights after the jump.

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* Reliable Source:

In this edition of Chatology, Department of Homeland Security head Michael Chertoff pulls a half-Ginsburg, spinning through both Meet the Press and This Week. On various issues, Chertoff blames Michael Brown, Mary Matalin blames the media, Joe Lieberman blames Chertoff, Evan Bayh blames the Democrats, and David Gregory blames himself. Random wisdom from Ari Fleischer: “You can be right and still be bonkers.” Speaking of which: Cheney is “almost like the wizard dealing with the muggles” — Howard Fineman.

Full rundown and highlights after the jump.

[Ed. note: Don't miss Ana Marie Cox's appearance at the National Press Club, this Wednesday, February 22, at 6:30 PM. For more details, as well as information about how to obtain tickets to this free event, click here.]

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By ANA MARIE COX

This Week’s Sunday spew lacks a taste of Greece: The Brylcreemed smoothness of Washington’s Hellenic homeboy, George Stephanopoulus, was pre-empted locally for emergency snow coverage. Because people in Washington are pussies.

We are thus unable to verify Condoleezza Rice’s landing of a Half-Ginsburg, but she was scheduled to go on both “This Week” and “Face the Nation.” She told “This Week” that the Danish cartoon protests “could spin out of control,” which we would never have guessed. Also, apparently Joe Biden was on, which is like missing Haley’s comet. If Haley’s comet came every weekend. We regret the loss.

Full rundown and highlights after the jump.

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On Sunday, DHS chief Michael Chertoff told “Meet the Press’s” Tim Russert that one reason for the delay in getting federal aid to Katrina victims was that “everyone” thought the crisis had passed when the storm left: “I remember on Tuesday morning picking up newspapers and I saw headlines, ‘New Orleans Dodged The Bullet.’” We’re wondering what papers the Chertoff household gets, because these are the headlines that greeted most people Tuesday morning:

Meet the Press made for compelling viewing this morning. First, Tim Russert got all feisty and paper-showing to Chertoff, demanding to know why FEMA wasn’t more prepared. Chertoff responded by saying that the levee break took them by “surprise,” and noted that “Tuesday morning, I opened newspapers and saw headlines that said ‘New Orleans dodged the bullet.’” Ah, well, so DHS gets its information from the papers. Good thing they’re not looking for WMDs or terrorists or anything. MORE »