medicaid
Pretty Sure This Arkansas Republican Calling For Shooting Of Fellow Republicans Will Claim He Meant ‘With Votes’
Well this is a nice change of pace! For once, a GOP newsletter has made its own news not by printing pictures of watermelon patches on the White House lawn, or calling for beheading Democrats, but by switching it up and calling for people to shoot fellow Republicans! We do get tired of writing the [...]
Sorry Louisiana Olds, Children, Poors And AIDS-Havers, Bobby Jindal Is Taking Your Medicaid
We have important breaking news for you Wonketeers: the first concentric ring of hell exists, and it is Louisiana. Is this a surprise, really? No, probably not: as aforementioned, it is home to the highest infant mortality rate, the fifth-highest maternal mortality rate, the fourth-worst life expectancy rate, the fifth-highest violent crime rate, the second-highest [...]
Bobby Jindal Here To Help Grandma Die Sad Painful Death, For Real, Hooray!
Well, at least it is not a post about guns, which is the only thing we can say about it without our head spinning around until it tears itself from our slender neck. News comes that by the end of the month, Louisiana will “save” all of $3 million by discontinuing hospice care for its [...]
Minnesota Conducts Fun ‘Experiment’ On Its Olds, Poors
Guess what happens when middle aged people are given a $400-per-month voucher to purchase health care in the Free Market. Guess! Just guess! Did you guess?
We Are Sure Those Sick Children Did Not Need The Millions Of Dollars Governor Mitt Romney Stole From Their Budget
Here is what you have been missing if you haven’t been paying attention to the Romney/Ryan campaign for the past few weeks: 47% of the country are losers! No wait, maybe it’s 60%! Either way, we need to cut government aid to Poors so we can break the cycle of government dependency! Less Medicaid will [...]
Liberal Scientists Claim That Health Insurance Stops Poor People From Dying, Somehow
You know the “conventional wisdom” that the “lamestream media” is always trying to feed you: people who go to the doctor when they’re sick tend to live longer than people who just hope that pus-filled abscess on their leg will “go away” if they put a mud poultice on it. And since here in USA [...]
Rick Perry Saves Poor Texans from Scourge of Medical Care
Opiate-devouring Texas Gov. Rick Perry is joining his friends Bobby, Scott, Nikki, and Bat Boy in choosing to reject the federal government’s Medicaid expansion. He can do this thanks to the Supreme Court handiwork of Burkean minimalist St. John Roberts, whom all liberals must love and respect eternally for only gutting half of Obamacare for [...]
Sorry, Arkansans Making $1899 Per Year, You Are Too Rich For Medicaid
Here is a fun (!) morning math lesson for you, our brilliant and talented and math-capable readers! If Arkanasas currently provides Medicaid to those making 17 percent of the poverty level in the US, and the poverty line in the US for a single person is $11,170 per year, how little do you have to [...]
Health Care Decision A Victory For Everyone, Except Millions Of Poor People Maybe
Good news, liberal-arts majors with Internet connections! Now even though you don’t have a “real job” but are making a livable amount of money by cobbling together three blogging gigs and so don’t have health insurance, starting in 2014 you will be able to (and also required) to stone-cold buy health insurance from whoever you [...]
GOP Michigan Lawmakers Will Drug-Test Your CEO Before Forking Over Corporate Welfare
Here is a nice story, fellows! A Republican representative in Michigan is not only against pee-testing those vile, filthy, scabies-befouled and constantly drug-addicted Medicaid queens, he has also introduced a bill requiring one-percenters to pee in the cup if they would like a government handout too! Now let us all hold hands and sing together, [...]
Colorado Cuts Costs By Banning Medicaid Coverage of Circumcisions
Lawmakers in Colorado decided that the mere $186,500 they will save annually by eliminating state Medicaid coverage of routine circumcisions was still worth it, because, whatever, why not, they aren’t really necessary for medical reasons. Who can resist these kinds of dumb headlines, anyway? Nobody. Probably other, actually devastating things were also cut (there’s that [...]
Teabaggers Oppose Cuts To Medicare and Medicaid When Polled About It, of Course
In a McClatchy-Marist poll released this week, 70% of registered voters who identify with the Tea Party opposed making cuts to either Medicare or Medicaid — the government-run health programs for the elderly and the poor — to help reduce the nation’s deficit. Meanwhile, only 28% of tea partiers said they’d be willing to cut [...]
Paul Ryan Plans To Ruin Medicare and Medicaid, Sneak In Tax Cuts For Rich
What has Congress been up to these days? We didn’t fire them, right? Yes, it would appear they still have jobs, and that job is continually “avoiding shutdown” because voters dividing power between the two very polarized parties these days is akin to snapping the government’s neck and putting it on life support. Sure, the [...]
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