Tag Archives: media matters

  Why can't white men catch a break?

Bill O’Reilly: Hillary Clinton To Murder All The Poor White Christian Men, Goodbye America

The world’s greatest and bravest and most honest award-winning war correspondent and objective reporter, Bill O’Reilly, offered his own Hot Take on Hillary Clinton’s chances of beating all the Republicans to a bloody pulp in the 2016 election. In O’Reilly’s fair and balanced nonpartisan analysis, Clinton has the clear advantage, and the reason will amaze you! Read more on Bill O’Reilly: Hillary Clinton To Murder All The Poor White Christian Men, Goodbye America…
  The Glassy-Eyed Knoll

Ace Reporter Bill O’Reilly Killed Lee Harvey Oswald, Ran Area 51, Co-Piloted Amelia Earhart’s Plane

Don't be silly. Everyone knows O'Reilly doesn't know how to play bass
For fans of Bill O’Reilly in full red-faced “I never said what I obviously said” mode, the next couple days should be fun. No, Bill O’Reilly was not at a Kennedy assassination figure’s suicide, Deep Throat’s parking garage, or the moon landing. Read more on Ace Reporter Bill O’Reilly Killed Lee Harvey Oswald, Ran Area 51, Co-Piloted Amelia Earhart’s Plane…
  Just A Distraction From ISIS

Get Ready For Your Big Benghazi HearingPalooza

It's baaaaack
Just in time for election season, the Great Big Benghazi Hearings and Airing of Grievances are starting Wednesday, so get ready for yet another round of Fox stories about “stand down” orders, Barack Obama sleeping on the job, and of course Susan Rice covering up the attack by saying that it started as a demonstration against an anti-Muslim video (which it did). Read more on Get Ready For Your Big Benghazi HearingPalooza…
  today in blahghazi

Surprise, Darrell Issa’s New Benghazi Revelation Not New Or A Revelation

Rancid beef jerky stick Darrell Issa has allegedly been in a snit over the new House Select Committee to investigate BENGHAAAAZI!!!11!!! because it bigfoots the investigations he has been chairing as head of the House Oversight Committee. Not that he doesn’t want to get to the bottom of the worst dereliction of duty since the Battle of Cannae … he just wants to get there first in the hope that the resultant glory will shine brightly enough to keep people from noticing he has the moral character of a feral sewer rat. Thus we had the spectacle yesterday of Issa leaking to his personal valet Jonathan Karl a new email that was supposed to show some malfeasance or other, but instead seemed to actually support the Obama administration’s contention that it thought from the very beginning that the Benghazi attack had been motivated by the YouTube video Innocence of Muslims. Whoops, that’s not the narrative the wingnuts have been pushing at full volume for almost two years. Read more on Surprise, Darrell Issa’s New Benghazi Revelation Not New Or A Revelation…
  postcard from idiot america

A Children’s Treasury Of Sober, Thoughtful Reflections On The 2014 Fort Hood Shootings

A terrible thing happened yesterday at Fort Hood in Killeen, Texas, and at this point, we don’t know much about the murderer, Ivan Lopez, except that he was an Iraq vet, was being treated for depression and anxiety, and was being evaluated for possible PTSD.  Those very limited details became available a few hours after the shootings. It didn’t take that long for other ideas to make their way into social media, however, like this charming thought from rightwing angerbucket Pat Dollard, who used to write for the Breitbart family of fine websites, posted shortly after news of the shootings broke, and after Dollard had posted three tweets about the shootings: To our knowledge, Lopez is not one of the infamous Islamabad Lopezes with whom we’re all familiar. But is that any reason not to call for “slaughtering Muslims in the streets”? Read more on A Children’s Treasury Of Sober, Thoughtful Reflections On The 2014 Fort Hood Shootings…
  this is only a test

Here Is Your Survey To Measure Wonkette’s Market Penetration Thought Leadering

Recently, Media Research Center, the low-rent conservative version of Media Matters, did a survey in order to get feedback on their greatness, and we were in awe of the survey, becaues there was simply no way to not celebrate the greatness of Media Research Center. Read more on Here Is Your Survey To Measure Wonkette’s Market Penetration Thought Leadering…
  land of a thousand dunces

Ted Nugent: Get More Guns Into Schools So Sandy Hook Kids Won’t Have Died In Vain

NRA board member and bozo birthday boy Ted Nugent, who is still neither dead nor in jail, marked the one-year anniversary of the Newtown Massacre with a WND column blaming the shootings on “political correctness” and warning that unless we arm teachers, eliminate gun-free zones, and do something about mentally ill people — as individuals, of course, not through government — then the 26 dead at Sandy Hook Elementary will have “died for nothing.” Silly us, we thought the reason that we needed to do something about idiots with guns was that the victims of Sandy Hook already did die for nothing. They died because it’s ridiculously easy for idiots with Rambo fantasies to get their hands on killing machines with high-capacity magazines, and even if some kind of meaningful reform of gun laws were to come about (a pipe dream, we know), that would not retroactively make the deaths of 20 children and 6 staff mean anything. There’s no redeeming those murders, no happy symbolic transformation that can give a Ted Nugent a moral justification for shitting on those graves. Read more on Ted Nugent: Get More Guns Into Schools So Sandy Hook Kids Won’t Have Died In Vain…
  fark you

Hey Reddit /R/Politics Refugees, Have You Considered Annexing Wonkville?

Do you know Reddit? It is this thing. It is a glorious place of Internet freedom where users (“Redditors”) post stories they have found from other places, and then other users (“Redditors”) vote up and down on whether it is “hot” or “not.” In that regard, it is much like our own Wonkville, where we send our readers to slave in the story mines and then bitch about how their headlines were better. A hot post on Reddit’s main politics “subreddit,” /r/politics, will flood the original site from which it was linked with masses of lovely, beautiful, $$$ traffic. This can be quite important, when you are trying to pay people and also eat food and also not be homeless, despite making your “living” on the internet. (Please send money.) But a thing has happened at /r/politics, and that is that some “moderators” went full Al Haig and had themselves a teeny-weeny little attack of I’M IN CHARGE HERE. They decreed that henceforth they would ban all stories from about a thousand million different websites completely (scroll down for the banned domains), for the crimes of being “sensational” (headlines that oversell their stories), “blogspam” (basically, any aggregator of news from around the web, which every blog is), or “bad journalism” (undefined). Among those sites? Just some total nonentities you’ve never heard of, like Mother Jones, the National Review, Media Matters, Right Wing Watch, Salon, Think Progress, and Huffington Post. Read more on Hey Reddit /R/Politics Refugees, Have You Considered Annexing Wonkville?…
  Let God Sort 'em Out

Fox’s Eric Bolling Has Innovative Idea: Save Money By Encouraging Prison Suicides

We weren’t planning to do anything on Ariel Castro’s suicide, because really, “horrible person kills self” is just not brimming with comedic possibilities. And then along comes Eric Bolling on Fox’s The Five with this brilliant observation: hey, by committing suicide, Castro saved the Ohio prison system a whole bunch of money, so let’s look at how much money we could save if everyone in Gitmo killed themselves! He’s got a whiteboard and consulted actuarial tables and everything, so you know it’s a serious idea. Read more on Fox’s Eric Bolling Has Innovative Idea: Save Money By Encouraging Prison Suicides…
  you can't handle the truth

Conservatives Launch New Website To Take Down Institutional Left, No Really For Serious This Time You Guys!

Well this will be fun! Noodle-brained jackanape Ben Shapiro is teaming up with crankypants David Horowitz to launch something called TruthRevolt.org, described as “the conservative counterpunch to Media Matters.” To which yr Wonkette can only say: THANK YOU! We are going to have so much fun wading through what is sure to be yet one more fever swamp of conservative lunacy and bullshit that we are not ashamed to say we peed in our sweatpants when we read about this. (Also we really need to get out more.) Media Matters has long been the Moby Dick to whichever conservative fancies himself as Ahab at any given moment, which has led to all sorts of awesome slurs directed against it: Soros-funded! Obama-linked! (MMFA was founded in 2004, well over two years before Obama announced he would seek the presidency – or so the Manchurian Kenyan’s handlers would have us believe!) It’s no surprise that the conservative leviathan would vomit up two of its more annoyingly loud and sneering acolytes to lead the latest whaling voyage. Shapiro’s announcement could not be more hilarious in its hyperbolic, unhinged ranting: Read more on Conservatives Launch New Website To Take Down Institutional Left, No Really For Serious This Time You Guys!…
  let's have a war

Fox’s Greg Gutfeld Live Tweets His Own Cross-Country Nervous Breakdown

The lack of internet access on planes used to provide people a bit of a forced break from being constantly connected to the miasma of awful penetrating our daily lives. However since Wifi access became a more or less standard feature on long flights, many people have decided to take advantage of this contained period of time to catch up on work or answer emails. Others, including failed titty magazine impresario and middle-aged youth expert Greg Gutfeld, apparently like to use this opportunity to spend five hours on a one-sided tweet rampage for no particular reason. Read more on Fox’s Greg Gutfeld Live Tweets His Own Cross-Country Nervous Breakdown…
  Ow My Head

Bill O’Reilly Making Even Less Sense Than Usual, Lauds Ted Nugent’s Doubleplus Goodthink

Here is another video of Bill O’Reilly not making a hell of a lot of sense. Follow this logic: He starts by saying that Barack Obama “has been somewhat successful in demonizing Republicans,” a point which he illustrates with a clip of Bobby Jindal saying the GOP needs to “stop being the stupid party” and start talking “like adults.” Um, yes, that really shows us something about the President’s demonizing agenda. Is Billo saying that Jindal has fallen prey to Obama’s mind-control rays? We do not know. Then, to counter Jindal, we get stupid Donald Trump saying Jindal was really stupid to say “stupid,” because now everyone will associate Republicans with “stupid” and Bobby Jindal’s face. Had Jindal not said that, we would associate the GOP with intellects like Donald Trump. Read more on Bill O’Reilly Making Even Less Sense Than Usual, Lauds Ted Nugent’s Doubleplus Goodthink…
  The Butthurt Locker

Fox News Victim Of Obama Campaign To Destroy Fox News, Says Fox News

Help, help, Fox News is bein’ repressed. Fox’s token liberal Kirsten Powers has composed a magnificent cri de butthurt about President Obama’s relentless campaign to destroy “the one television news outlet in America that won’t fall in line and treat him as emperor.” And she argues that if anyone should care about this massive assault on free speech, it’s liberals, because “liberalism is founded on the idea of cherishing dissent and an inviolable right to freedom of expression.” Why are all you liberals so blind to the violence inherent in the system? Read more on Fox News Victim Of Obama Campaign To Destroy Fox News, Says Fox News…
  accidents can happen

Dick Armey Sorry He Dished To Most Sinister Far-Left Outlet On The Planet, ‘Media Matters’

Were any of you as surprised as we were when Dick Armey decided to dish about all the crimes going on at his “grassroots” Tea Party group to the most sinister far-left outlet on the planet, Media Matters, last week? It was awesome; he explained how the “grassroots” Tea Party group FreedomWorks, before it paid him $8 million to leave like two months early, also paid millions to Glenn Beck and Rush Limbaugh to say nice things about it, and not in any kind of “this is a paid promotion,” or “here is a message from our partners” way, because that is a thing that Glenn Beck and Rush Limbaugh do. It’s just called “ethics” you guys, and Limbaugh and Beck are full to bursting with it! Well Erick Erickson and stupidest man on the Internet Jim Hoft were as surprised as you were! But there is a simple answer. Dick Armey has picked up the phone again to set the record straight (again), and this time it was one-ringy-dingy, two-ringy-dingies to the Daily Caller, who are presumably Erickson- and Jim Hoft-approved! And it turns out it was all a big misunderstanding. Armey thought the whole time he was on the horn with Media Matters that he was actually spilling his guts to far-right lunatics at the Media Research Center. This is because he is an old man and, unlike your Wonkette, does not actually know who Brent Bozell is. Read more on Dick Armey Sorry He Dished To Most Sinister Far-Left Outlet On The Planet, ‘Media Matters’…
  lies damn lies and fox news

Poor Fox & Friends Forced To Retract Easily Disprovable Lie

Yesterday, Media Matters had a very enjoyable little item in which they caught Steve and Gretchen and probably the rapey one just cold comparing apples to steaming piles of elephant shit, as regards the growth in unemployment under President B. Bamz. In fact — you will be just shocked to learn — “real” unemployment had grown by .5 percent rather than, oh, DOUBLING. Read more on Poor Fox & Friends Forced To Retract Easily Disprovable Lie…
  losers

Erin Burnett Thinks You Are A Loser, Lies About It

OMG you guys, what was it like to wake up on Thursday and have less liberty? Did you know right away, or were you in so much shock that it took awhile to hit you? Because these are the kinds of questions your grandkids will ask about the Day That Justice Roberts Took Freedom Away, or alternatively, as CNN’s Erin Burnett put it, We All Became Losers. Well, au contraire mon soeur, SOME of us were ALREADY losers, ha. Also, Erin Burnett is making things up as she goes along, which is only surprising because her lies and obfuscations are usually in service to gargantuan financial institutions, not Mitt Romney. So this is something new and different! Read more on Erin Burnett Thinks You Are A Loser, Lies About It…