April 21, 2014
Attention, Wonkerinos! We have an important message — five, actually — from a reader who was miffed that today’s Wonket did not give Alex Jones and his merry band of truthseekers their due. “Groovychickedy” just wants to set the record straight for us: One cannot simply brush Alex Jones under the carpet anymore. Alternative media […]
Welcome to another edition of Derp Roundup, the weekly feature where we bring you stories that didn’t quite merit a post of their own, but that were too stupid to ignore altogether. As always, you may want to fortify yourself with whatever you believe necessary to get through the experience — we suggest a couple […]
Let’s play a fun game. It is called “What Is Wrong With Matt Drudge?” and the answer cannot be “everything” because then the game is over. Above you see his illustration this morning for the Golden Globe nominations, in which 12 Years A Slave and American Hustle both made out like armed robbers. Armed robbers […]
Hey, Drudge and Weekly Standard, did anything happen during President Richard Milhouse Obama’s press conference with the Turkish premiere or prime minister or president or whatever? (We are not required to know who that guy is, because AMERICA.) Oh, nothing, he just CALLED OUT THE MARINES? Well that is one way to murder all of […]
Triple radioactive death ray from space alert siren: the IRS is holocausting America. No, seriously, it is true because Serious Investigationist Reporter Matt Drudge, who has never been wrong about anything, especially when it comes to Holocausty things, says so: It is Just Like Hitler Day again?!?!?!? (Yes, because every day is Just Like Hitler […]
Matt Drudge, long known as the man behind the homepage of the Internet for people who still think it’s 1998, has recently taken to posting on Twitter. Because he is basically just a crazy, hyperemotional shill, it turns out that what goes on under the hat is a continual teenage-lesbian-poetry breakup with America. Cold rain in DC, […]
Here, in its entirety, is the Weekly Standard story to which Drudge is appending pictures of Hitler and Stalin:
Public Policy Polling has separated itself from the other polling outfits through one simple trick: Its polls include weird questions. It’s how we found out, for example, that God had a 52-percent approval rating last year, and that only 19 percent of GOP voters polled believed Obama was going to heaven. They are not questions […]
We are sorry to all the vile lefties who visit this site, but your precious Barack Obama is toast, man. He’s done. Having clearly become tired of waiting for the Romney Camp to do a GAME CHANGE its own inept self, Matt Drudge and Tucker Carlson and Sean Hannity took it upon themselves to release […]
Matt Drudge will make you refresh a million times, as he updates his previous teases with “THE ACCENT… THE ANGER… THE ACCUSATIONS…” Fuck you Breitbart’s Ghost, you never found this!
Above is an important tweeter that noted journalism maven Matt Drudge loosed upon a bored, Tuesday-before-the-debate-slow-newsday world. But what, WHAT could be on this tape that Ghost Andrew Breitbart hasn’t already dropped???
You guy, I’m worried about WND, Joseph Farah’s No. 1 News Source for Copy-and-Pasted Chuck Norris Columns. First came the screaming headline EXECUTIVE-ORDER PANIC: MARTIAL LAW IN THE U.S.? and three long paragraphs explaining President Barack O’Stalin’s nefarious plans to ration your wimmen, helpfully summed up here: A Canada Free Press article titled “Obama Executive […]
Sad lumpen unemployed bitter former radio talker, inveterate gossip, bridge burner, and total future Wonkette editorial trainee John Ziegler has a scoop that can no longer be confirmed by his alleged source, late American blogger Andrew Breitbart, and boy is it a doozy! According to Ziegler, Drudge was in man-love with Barack Obama and kept […]
American blog owner Andrew Breitbart is dead. He was 43 years old, and reportedly died of “natural causes” in Los Angeles early this morning. We knew Breitbart — “we,” meaning many of us who have written for Wonkette, including young Riley Waggaman, pictured above at left — and he was a pleasant enough goofball in […]
Did you know that Rick Santorum is a very Christian person? He’d always come across to us like a publicly secular, church on Easter and Christmas only kinda guy who doesn’t really “buy into all that stuff.” But nope, he’s Christian as the dickens, and he sees everything as a struggle between God and Satan. […]