Tag: math

Is Jill Stein Stupider Than Betsy DeVos?

Stupidest person in America.

Possible Trump Spox/Daily Mail ‘Reporter’ Celebrates Trump’s Landslide Popular Vote Win!

Just in: If the Daily Mail carried news, it'd be a newspaper.

Ivanka Trump’s Unpaid Interns Want To Tell Other Interns How To Live Fabulously Poor

Ivanka Trump keeps domestic slaves to make her website look fancy.

Don’t Listen To Teevee Chefs About Sunscreen Plz

Oh thank God, it's the Snake Oil Bulletin!

If Donald Trump Says 3 + 1 = 5, Then 3 + 1 = 5

The math teachers LOVE Trump.

John Kasich: Math Is Stupid. The Moon Is Stupid. Votes Is Stupid.

What in the name of Buckeye Chuck (official groundhog of Ohio, #statefact) is John Kasich yipper-yappering about now? Oh, just the tyranny, of things like math and votes and democracy and the moon and other things that chap his...
He thinks good

George Zimmerman Opposes Racist Hate Crimes Now, Hooray!

You have probably been wondering, ever since the horrible news broke yesterday, "Say! What does unemployable child-killer George Zimmerman think about the unspeakable killings of two young television journalists in Virginia? I am looking forward to his insights!" Happily, Mr....
What squares!

Kids These Days Good At Math, Bad At F*cking

Hello, American teenage teens, quick question for you: Why are you so goddamned boring? Do you not know how to be teenagers and do stupid rebellious teenage things, and get yourselves into trouble and be reckless and irresponsible and...
The Sarah Palin Farknocker Report, Presented By Fartknocker

The Fartknocker Report: Nanny-Stater Sarah Palin Tells America How To Raise Kids Good

The Sarah Palin Channel has resumed its previous publication schedule, pumping out two videos (combined run-time: 3:26) in the last week. The first video, "Raising Patriots," features Palin telling hard-working Americans how to raise their own goddamn kids, because Sarah Palin...
Maybe the demon sheep ruined HP.

Did Carly Fiorina Run Hewlett-Packard Into The Ground, Or Did SEXISM Do It?

Carly Fiorina has had a busy couple of decades! There was the 1990s, when she was so tied up she didn't have a chance to vote, and there was the 2000s, when she thought a good way to get Barbara...
Guess he taught that cuni a lesson.

How Are The Feminists Keeping Men From Getting Laid Today?

Nothing like kicking off 2015 with a few stories about how bad men have it in today's modern feminist-dominated world, where men are on the verge of being ruined by all these radical feminists running loose and running everything,...
Lesbian and/or baby-killer

Anti-Abortion Lady Does Math Proving Abortion Is Fake

So Thursday on the Twittersphere, some pro-choice ladies had a big internet event, telling their own stories of having had abortions, with the goal of reducing the stigma of talking about a legal medical procedure that one in three women...
It's really quite simple. Or should be.

Rachel Maddow: Good For You, Washington State, You’re 50% Smarter Now (Video)

Rachel Maddow is delighted -- and so are we, because happy Rachel = Happy us -- that in the recent Scottish independence referendum, small but substantial numbers of ballots had to be thrown out because they had both "Yes"...
See? He's doin' math!

Sen. Kay Hagan’s Opponent Will Do All The Math For Her Dumb Little Lady Brain

Let's say you are the North Carolina house speaker, and your name is Thom Tillis -- hypothetically. You have big bold dreams of being a fancy-pants United States senator, so you decide to challenge sitting Sen. Kay Hagan. Let...

Wingnut Sexpert Matt Barber: ‘The Left’ Wants To Legally Jizz On Your Children

Wingnut extraordinaire Matt Barber, who writes almost exclusively about how The Gay Agenda is going to kill us all, except for when he explains that feminists are in favor of rape, has discovered another completely new thing about "the...

Wall Street Journal Loves Poor People So Much It Wants To Make More Of Them

So you know how President Obama called for a minimum wage of $10.10 in the State of the Union? Well, that is a great plan if you HATE THE POORS. But if you love the poor, if you have...