mass shootings

OUR COLD DEAD HANDS  9:41 am May 15, 2013

Are You Smarter Than These Gun-Toters?

by Gary Legum

With the astronomical amounts of derp spewing into the atmosphere over the IRS, the AP, and BENGHAZI!!!!11!!!!, it is easy to forget that Americans continue every day to shoot each other with guns in ever more inventive ways. Lucky for you that yr Wonkette is here to remind you that every time you think the [...]

NOT AFRAID TO BE SERVICEY  1:22 pm April 26, 2013

Learn ABC’s 11 Weird Tricks To Surviving A Mass Shooting!

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

Mass shootings! It is like, they are everywhere, lol! And when someone comes at you with 14 guns and 5,000 rounds of ammunition right after they got out of prison for murdering their wife and inlaws, because seeing if someone is a law abiding citizen before selling them weapons discriminates against people who are law [...]

SEE YOU NEXT TUESDAY  3:50 pm January 7, 2013

Connecticut Rep. To Gabby Giffords: Newtown Ain’t Big Enough For The Both Of Us

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

(Above: Former Congresswoman Gabby Giffords Politicizes the Pledge Of Allegiance) Connecticut state representative (and Assistant Republican Leader) DebraLee Hovey simply did not care for former Congresswoman/current private citizen Gabby Giffords swanning into HER towns (plural) to be all POLITICAL by meeting privately and sans press with the grieving families of Newtown as though she had [...]

GUNS DON'T KILL PEOPLE ... OH FUCK IT  1:30 pm December 24, 2012

An Armed Guard At Every Out Of Control Blaze

by Kris E. Benson

By now, you have all probably heard that four firefighters were shot (two of them fatally) while responding to a fire in upstate New York. There is only one solution for this (obviously) and that is to station armed guards at every raging fire, in addition to the armed guards we will have in the [...]


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