Mark Penn Column: Satan Is A Cool Guy, Once You Get To Know Him
Tuesday, August 12th, 2008
A day after the Atlantic released tons of confidential memos and e-mails that, yet again, proved Hillary Clinton’s former chief strategist Mark “Bowser” Penn kills puppies for bloodsport, the Politico has comically published an op-ed from this very same Mark Penn, entitled, “Negative ads: They really do work.” Christ, Mark, we get it; Wolfson and Grunwald and Ickes were silly sallies who kept spoiling your hellish strategy for charred victory. But that doesn’t mean you have to write some creepy op-ed in the damn Politico every three hours! Seriously, creepy — in this op-ed, Penn reveals how he and Bill Clinton used to stalk people at the mall in 1996. MORE »
A day after the Atlantic released tons of confidential memos and e-mails that, yet again, proved Hillary Clinton’s former chief strategist Mark “Bowser” Penn kills puppies for bloodsport, the Politico has comically published an op-ed from this very same Mark Penn, entitled, “Negative ads: They really do work.” Christ, Mark, we get it; Wolfson and Grunwald and Ickes were silly sallies who kept spoiling your hellish strategy for charred victory. But that doesn’t mean you have to write some creepy op-ed in the damn Politico every three hours! Seriously, creepy — in this op-ed, Penn reveals how he and Bill Clinton used to stalk people at the mall in 1996. MORE »









For the last few days, the folks at the Atlantic magazine have been
BEST DREAM TEAM SINCE ‘92 USA BASKETBALL: Former Clinton chief strategist and irreparable dipshit Mark Penn is hiring a new vice chairwoman for his elitist Burson-Marsteller PR firm, and it’s Eleanor Roosevelt. Just kidding, it’s worse! He is hiring famous Bush loyalist Karen Hughes as his vice chairwoman, where she will “provide crisis communications consulting and advice to corporate clients.” What a catch! Karen Hughes has a well detailed background as a
Hillary Clinton may have conceded the Democratic presidential nomination last weekend, but that doesn’t mean her old ex-friend Dick Morris doesn’t have some more strategic advice for her! You have heard of this
Hillary’s election strategy is legendarily flawed, what with it making her lose and all. Look at the classic fable of New Jersey and Idaho on Super Tuesday: Hillary puts all her time into winning the big state, ignores Idaho, while Obama holds one mega-rally in Boise. She wins New Jersey’s
It was quite the star-studded affair in Washington D.C. Saturday evening for the annual White House Correspondents Dinner, perhaps the District’s biggest social night of the year. This is the one where journalists and the politicos they cover congregate in an overt celebration of their inappropriate friendships — you know, the ones that caused the Iraq War. All of America can drink to that! Obviously the public-at-large wouldn’t care about a journalism party — they are not for the soft-at-heart, or people who have lives — if it weren’t for the WHCD’s other strange attraction, the liberal Hollywood Movie Star guests! Your Wonkette’s associate editor and videographer/Polaroidist Liz Glover donned our best church clothes Saturday to witness the proceedings, and all we got were strange memories and a wretched purple umbrella that says “Bloomberg.” The troubling story, below!
Former Bill Clinton strategist Paul Begala, the squirrelly hobbit to James Carville’s mangy elf, spoke at a breakfast in New York City this morning and used the occasion to vent about how much he hates Mark Penn, Hillary’s ex-Chief Strategist and current chief strategist. Because everyone hates Mark Penn and that is why he is… still working for Hillary Clinton! But do most “Clinton people” go so far as to compare Penn to Donald Rumsfeld? The hobbit goes, because the hobbit knows. 
You know who’s happy about Mark Penn