Sarah Palin’s in the news, everyone! For, let’s see here, lying. While most of her recent lies have been about covering up how that young man, Levi, this one is about how she told the media that she thought Sen. Mark Begich should resign so there can be a “fair” election between him and the very innocent Ted Stevens. The lie she’s telling, of course, is that she NEVER SAID THIS. MORE »

Ha ha wasn’t it funny how Ted Stevens probably could have won back his Senate seat in Alaska if he hadn’t been found guilty in his corruption trial, but then he was found guilty, and he lost, and then Eric Holder threw the case away yesterday because the prosecution had mishandled it? Cool story. And now the Republican party of Alaska has called for Sen. Mark Begich to resign so that he can run against Stevens in a special election, for fairness. Hmm let’s think about that NO. [Fox News]

• Instead of fixing Florida’s terrible economy, Charlie Crist spent a quarter of a million dollars in sunny Madrid, including $1,300 on a minibar tab, presumably immediately preceding sex with his fiance, a known woman. [Andrew Sullivan]
• Mark Begich, who is from Alaska and is neither Trig nor Ted Stevens so why would you know who this is?, doesn’t want to send Stevens, whom he beat in last month’s Senate race, to jail. [TPMMuckraker]
• President Bush is thinkin all profound-like. “I’m just a simple President,” he tells Cynthia McFadden. [ABC News]
• The mystery of “Senate Candidate #5″ is like that of “Client-9″ but with fewer whore diamonds (because of the recession.) [Marc Ambinder]
• Fran Drescher, whom you might remember hating on teevee programs like The Nanny, would like Hillary Clinton’s old gig as a Senator. [CNN Political Ticker]

• TED STEVENS EXPULSION POSTPONED: The Senate GOP Conference delayed a vote today on expelling Ted Stevens from their weird little club. They want to wait to see how the Alaska vote turns out! And, if you can even believe it, the MONSTROUSLY SLOW Alaska elections people are finally supposed to count the last major batch of ballots today. Mark Begich is ahead by 1,000-ish 2,374 votes and will probably win. But who knows? Sarah Palin could find some way to screw this up. [ADN]

• STEVENS WILL PROBABLY LOSE: A modicum of “reality” has been restored to Alaska, as it now looks like convicted felon Ted Stevens will lose his Senate seat to Democrat Mark Begich, whose popularity stems from being the candidate in the race who isn’t a convicted felon. Stevens’ own pollster is calling Begich’s victory a sure thing, as most of the remaining absentee and early ballots waiting to be counted will favor Democrats. We, however, are hesitant to go all in based on the logic of Alaskan voters. [HuffPo]

• A CLEAR MANDATE FROM THE PEOPLE: “The elections division still has over 10,000 ballots left to count today and thousands more through next week, but the latest numbers show Mark Begich leading Sen. Ted Stevens 125,019 to 125,016.” [ADN]

Amid all the excitement of last night’s HISTORIC ELECTION a few important questions went unanswered, at least here on the Wonkette. For example: did fluorescent light foe and unrepentant baby-farmer Michelle Bachmann successfully defend her Minnesota district from insurgent chaotic-good lawn sprite Elwyn Tinklenberg? And whatever happened to that poop factory over in San Francisco? This morning, we have answers. MORE »

The ancient snow troll who coined the most tired Internet phrase in the universe and who wanted to build a bazillion-dollar bridge to his Arctic Palace for Alcoholic Vietnam Vets ‘N Herring may soon leave the Senate seat he has occupied since 1812. That’s right — Ted Stevens faces some sort of opponent in his latest re-election bid. And he’s losing to this Democrat nobody! MORE »