C’mon people, stop bitching and moaning and threatening to move to socialist Europe under the false assumption that a lame Sarah Palin/Convention bounce has somehow sealed Barack Obama’s terrible fate. Wah wah wah. Things could be so much worse for Barry! Because if John McCain was set on picking a random lady with a narrative, he could’ve gone with Colorado Rep. Marilyn Musgrave instead. Her narrative, as shown in this re-election ad, is far more compelling than Palin’s. Musgrave grew up in Industrial England as a slave hobo, eating Oliver Twist’s leftover porridge and getting beaten up by her drunk father and crying. And then she became a Congresswoman! FOR FIVE AND A HALF YEARS. [YouTube]

Representative Marilyn Musgrave, seen here in a photo from Wonkette’s extensive “funny picture” database. (AFP) MORE »

• Heard on the Hill: Rep. Kartherine Harris was seen barefoot outside of her house, screaming into her mail slot, “Let me in”. . . Does Rep. Marilyn Musgrave (R-Colo.) support the KKK?. . . “Lots of would-be Cabinet and high-level White House officials in a Gore administration” attended the reception for his film. [Roll Call]
• Washington Whispers: Democrats will scare voters about Republican plans for Social Security. . . Rumsfeld found “United 93″ to be “really tough to watch”. . . Democrats are concerned about a Speaker Pelosi. . . Harry Reid loves his iPod. . . Bill Frist’s wife is releasing a book about fathers and daughters. [USN&WR]
• Inside the Beltway: Dick Cheney: “I will consider a book when that time comes.” [WT]
• Lloyd Grove’s Lowdown: Clarence Thomas thinks Bush is in “real trouble.” [NYDN]
• Names & Faces: Natalie Maines of the Dixie Chicks on Bush: “I don’t feel he is owed any respect whatsoever.”. . . Arianna Huffington: “You can smell the fear in Hillary Clinton. What happened to that fearless woman? Everything she does is poll-tested.” [WP]

[AFP/Mandel Ngan]

Mmmmmm….BRAINS! MORE »

• Military requests $3.9b to prepare Iraqi forces for a reduced American presence; Bush’s “strategy for victory” would rely on a “smaller, more lethal” American force. [NYT]
• Bush: “I want to defeat the terrorists, and I want our troops to come home, but I don’t want them to come home without having achieved victory. . . Quitting is not an exit strategy.” [WP]
• Administration vows to respond to E.U. questions concerning secret CIA prison locations in Europe. [WP]
• Republicans strongly denounce Rep. Randy Cunningham’s conduct in an effort to distance themselves from bribery scandal. [NYT, LAT]
• Businessman under investigation in Cunningham case supported 32 House members or candidates and raised over $100,000 for Bush’s re-election. [USAT, USAT]
• Bush continues promotion of his border security plan; raises $1.3m for Sen. Jon Kyl (R-Ariz.) and $450,000 for Rep. Marilyn Musgrave (R-CO). [WP, NYT]
• R. Glenn Hubbard, the former chairman of Bush’s Council of Economic Advisers, calls the president’s Medicare plan “unwise”: “The current Social Security and Medicare systems are on an unsustainable path. . . The drug benefit is a new entitlement. This isn’t sustainable over the long haul and I don’t think it’s sustainable even over the next five years.” [WSJ]

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