Marcus Bachmann

How was your day yesterday? Do you still have a stick of furniture left unbroken after the twin-barreled double fun dose of bullshit you got from the Supreme Court? Neither do we! So as you can imagine, we’re grasping at the slimmest of straws to find something that makes us feel less filled with rage […]

We’re not sure how we feel about the fact that Fox News had not one, but two, segments yesterday in which their hosts excoriated some of the derpier parts of the right wing. On the one hand, hahahahaha. On the other hand, agreeing with Fox News about things makes us feel icky. Not icky enough […]

Science Fiction! OK, Science-ish Fiction? Not-at-all-Science Fiction. YOU GUYS ARE BUSTING MY BALLS, JESUS! Well, Jesus, exactly, specifically that weird Jesus thing where they think they can make the hairdressers straight, because it worked for Marcus Bachmann, amiright? (Don’t answer that question.) Trouble is, you just can’t seem to find anyone who it has worked […]

CBS has announced that Stephen Colbert will replace David Letterman on “The Late Show,” leaving one really important question unanswered: if Stephen Colbert becomes David Letterman, who then will be Stephen Colbert? Never fear. We’ve compiled an incisive and trenchant and helpful list of 13 People Who Should Be Your New Stephen Colbert. We were […]

Normally we do not highlight things that are going to air on Limey Socialist BBC TV, but for this we’ll make an exception, because this poor openly gay UK doctor set himself the task of coming to America to go undercover and explore the wide variety of ex-gay/un-gaying/whatever “therapies” that we have to offer. Land […]

You gotta hand it to good old sad old Marcus Bachmann. He takes a licking (ewww now we have that image in our head and we HATE us) and keeps on ticking. After the homosexxicans at Truth Wins Out went all undercover-like and found out what we all knew – that Marcus’ “counseling” services was […]

There’s not much to say about this except HOLY SHIT! YES! WOW! WOOOO! THIS IS AMAZING! WE ARE CRYING A LITTLE! No, Joe Biden is not sexting us, it’s BETTER! Exodus International, an organization founded to “help” LGBT people not be gay anymore because Jesus, will now cease to exist. And it’s not because they […]

Well just look what beloved old giggling walrus Marcus Bachmann has sent to our inbox marked with subject line: “Shhh… Don’t tell Michelle.” GO ON?

Oh look, Michele Bachmann doesn’t even know the names of the random “children” she assembled to make this dumb Christmas video to remind everyone that her gay husband Marcus is so gay that he’s not even allowed in the family Christmas video. “Don’t forget the reason for the season,” sez Michele … which is marginalizing […]

It was another day of thuggery on the Iowa campaign trail as Michele Bachmann’s remaining followers mercilessly booed and taunted a sad gay robot. The pudgy homosexual android just wanted to make a case for itself, but the slob wingnuts just chanted BOOOOO because that’s how they “cure homosexuality.” Speaking of pudgy gay robots, has […]

Your Wonkette reporter of homosexuals is very sad to report that Republican presidential candidate and famous Congresslady Michele Bachmann’s silver-maned heterosexual dreamboat needs some cash. $150, to be exact. No, it is not for a beautiful new wig or one of those special fake-booby things that drag queens wear! Stop being silly, everyone. It’s just […]

Oh excitement, Entertainment Weekly ABC News got around to recycling one of these sticky cotton candy puff pieces on how the blond Stepford wives of the GOP candidates still manage, against all odds, to behave like perfect ladies amongst themselves even as their deranged spouses hurl feces at one another all day long. What gives […]

More drama from the Michele Bachmann campaign! Her former team of New Hampshire staffers who all quit Friday put out a very crabby press release stating that they quit not for the glaringly obvious reasons that Michele Bachmann is a serial pill-snarfing nutcase Space Jesus freak married to a flaming closet case who together make […]

Welcome to the seventh dimension, humans: even Satan’s pet horned toad Rush Limbaugh thinks Michele Bachmann’s ludicrous claim that the Gardasil HPV vaccine causes girls to “suffer mental retardation” is off-the-reservation insane.

Gay Halloween Christmas comes early this year! Is that even a legal holiday? No? What is this? Oh, it is Glitter Bomb Fat Closet Case Marcus Bachmann’s Clinic Day! And as it is written, a mob of homosexuals descended upon Marcus Bachmann’s office to sing gay pagan carols to him dressed like cavemen and to […]