Tag: manhattan

Still working on the branding

‘Trump’ Name Coming Off New York Apartments So Humans Can Rent Without Paralyzing Shame

Renters aren't crazy about living in high-end buildings labeled 'Trump.' Can't they be deported?

Obama Designates Stonewall As First LGBT National Monument. You’re Next, Mt. Rushmore

What is our president Barack O'Sexytime up to on this lovely Friday, as the world reels from the UK's vote to leave the European Union? Oh, just gay stuff, because that's what he always does. Obama signed a proclamation...
Ben Carson celebrates his 3rd place finish in the 16th District

Ben Carson Beats Ted Cruz With Both Eyeballs Tied Behind His Back (Because He Is Sleeping)

As the dust and clichés settle following the New York primary, two things are at least clear: 1) Donald Trump had a YOOOGE win, except in Manhattan, where people apparently know him, and 2) Somehow, Ben Carson won...

Donald Trump’s Crimes Against Food Cannot Go Unanswered

Donald Trump is a horrific amalgamation of spray-tan contents, bile, and discarded golden retriever hair -- on this, we can all agree. He's advocated for war crimes, spoken out against the First Amendment, and committed atrocities against decency almost...
A power bottom for your gay love, and also your dollars.

Does Ted Cruz Secretly Want To Gay Marry The Homosexuals?

BREAKING NEWS, EVERYONE. Ted Cruz, a politician from Texas, is a politician, and he is from Texas. (And Canada. And Cuba.) Yes, we know, everybody thinks he's this Pure Conservative Social Warrior, untainted by the taint smells of politickin', but...
Yup.

Douchebag Hipsters Named Trevor Would Like A Glass Of Your Finest Rosé Please

First off, apologies to all the Trevors, but we had to pick a name, so we went with Trevor. Or Chase. It could easily be Chase. Would Hunter like to join us? Sup bro? What shall we do this...
Hey poors, good news about the doors!

Chin Up, New York Poors, You No Longer Have To Use Separate-But-Equal Doors

Among the many methods we as Americans have to communicate to poorer folks that they're Less Than, New York's "poor doors" have to be one of the grossest. If you're not familiar, developers in the city would get huge...
P.S.: I am not a crank

Deleted Comments Of The Week: Shoot-Out At The Not-Okay Corral

Oh, it has been a busy week in Deleted Comments land! Thanks to our switchover to Disqus, the comments are a bit more Wild West-y than they had been -- in Olden times, new commenters had to be approved,...

Donald Trump Outraged That Barack Obama Has Revealed Existence Of NYC To Our Enemies

So here is your nontroversy of the afternoon: Donald Trump is furious that Barack Obama has mentioned the possibility of a terrorist nuclear attack on Manhattan, because, as he told Fox News's Greta Van Susteren today, the President "just...

New York Man Arrested Before He Could Shoot GW Bush, Win Daughter Barbara’s Love In A Dying America

So here is a thing that happened: A New York man armed with a rifle, boxes of ammunition and a machete was arrested Friday after allegedly threatening to kill former President George W. Bush, according to a federal court complaint. Apparently,...

Attention Bigots: There Is Already a Mosque Near the WTC Site

Wonkette operative "Evan B." writes: "The debate over the planned mosque at Ground Zero seems a bit retarded to me; I work directly between the planned mosque and a mosque that has existed before 9/11 and continues to operate...

Terrorist Ship That Was Rammed Into Ye Olde Worlde Trade Centre Discovered

Workers are excavating the World Trade Center site (Not done yet? What is this, union labor?), and on Tuesday, they found a giant 18th-century ship stuck in there. How? Well, back then terrorists were called "pirates." (Evil liberal Hollywood...

The Night Marilyn Monroe Sang ‘Happy Birthday’ To JFK

It was 48 years ago today that Marilyn Monroe was literally sewn into a see-through gown and carried out to the stage of Madison Square Garden to serenade President John F. Kennedy for his birthday. LIFE photographer Bill Ray...