Oh, gross! It’s a “viral marketing scheme” designed to shanghai you into taking a blood oath in support of Barack Obama’s socialist revolution. Just watch this video by the new fake David Plouffe, sign some dumb little online petition, and voila, you will be spared a personal “visit” by Obama’s praetorian guard. [Organizing for America Pledge Project, Ben Smith]

Fred Voight, the adorably rosy-cheeked Deputy Election Commissioner of Philadelphia, says that antsy-pantsy voters need to just “get a life” and wait in the rain for hours and hours to vote on a single not-broken machine on election day. And then he’s all, “do not get your knickers in a twist, Philadelphia’s 5-to-1 Democratic, so we know how this election will go anyway.” He is the most refreshingly candid public official since Joe Biden. [American News Project]

Ooh, it’s the new scary McCain ad! Alas, it leaves out William Ayers, Jeremiah Wright, the Rosenbergs, and Jane Fonda. They are all from Chicago, and they all have implanted chips in Barack Obama’s brain that make him Not Ready to Lead. [YouTube]