WASHINGTON, DC, 11:05 PM, MON NOVEMBER 9 | Advertise on Wonkette | tips@wonkette.com | SUBMIT A TIP | RSS

Posts Tagged ‘mac is back’

JOHN MCCAIN

Tuesday, February 12th, 2008

OLD MAN McCAIN BARELY BEATS KINDLY PREACHER HUCKABEE CNN just called Virginia for Walnuts McCain, and there’s some very nervous applause from the McCain people. There are only 2,500 votes between them with 55% of the precincts reporting.


REPUBLICANS

Tuesday, February 5th, 2008

BREAKING: JOHN McCAIN ACTUALLY WON ARIZONA: Considering how all the Arizona Republicans hate his shamnesty guts, it’s kind of a big deal that Walnuts won his “home” “state.” At least he did really badly, as far as winning. He only got a third of the “conservative” vote, while Mitt took 47%.


REPUBLICANS

McCain Soars On Glorious Wings of Magnificent Ancient Pheonix!

Thursday, January 24th, 2008

mccaintime.jpgOoh, the new issue of Time has our friend WALNUTS! on the cover with a new nickname: The Phoenix. I get it, it’s because (a) he had burned and died but somehow still lives and (b) Phoenix is a town in Arizona, which he represents in the Congress! Is it maybe time to retire WALNUTS! for “The Phoenix?” Never. His campaign may rise and fall, but his torture cheeks shall eternally swell for America. [via Jonathan Martin]


REPUBLICANS

Liveblogging McCain’s S.C. Victory Speech

Saturday, January 19th, 2008

So it only took eight years for John McCain to win the South Carolina primary, hooray! Let’s see what the happy old coot has to say. MORE »