lyndon b. johnson

TODAY IN MILD OATHS  2:10 pm October 25, 2012

History’s Greatest Monster Barack Obama Calls Poor Defenseless Mitt Romney A Vile Swear

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

Oh dear oh dear! Supposed “cool guy” Barack Obama called fragile, defenseless centimillionaire former CEO and current Republican nominee for president of these godfearing United States of America Mittens Romney a vile swear meaning one who defecates like boy cows, and the Republic may crumble from the dastardly act. What if children who unaccountably look [...]

GETTING CREATIVE  2:00 pm May 24, 2012

Ghost Of Breitbart Convinced That Obama Will Drop Out Of The Presidential Race

by Liz Colville

Breitbart hologram Mike Flynn has been feeling the warm breeze of change that causes the flag of America to gently billow across his cheek, and also has been sifting through the history books, poring over some of the most improbable scenarios that have ever befallen America, and has decided that because history repeats itself, as [...]

GREAT FOREIGN POLICY EXPERTS OF OUR TIME  10:34 am November 14, 2011

Michele Bachmann Is Completely Unaware That China Is Communist

by Kirsten Boyd Johnson

Blathering reject Michele Bachmann showed off her fancy foreign policy knowledge at Saturday’s dull GOP debate by noting that the real capitalists over there in China don’t give out food stamps according to her expert sources (Space Lizard Jeebus), which is why they are kicking America’s socialist economy in the ass. Why can’t America be [...]

BARACK OBAMA  12:35 pm April 28, 2008

Barack Obama’s Controversial Pastor Was Navy War Hero Who Saved LBJ

by Ken Layne


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