It is too bad Wonket does not allow comments, because if it did, surely Gilberton, Pennsylvania, Police Chief Mark Kessler would make the cut! He could come and tell us how we worthly wonket scum take it up the ass and need to be “cleansed” from the country (as Dems, liberals, and “liberal news agency’s”) […]

You were once just two little cells, floating around in goo inside some disgusting lady who probably just had sex. But even back then you were still a complete human being, according to state representative Tom Shaw, one of nine Iowa Republicans who introduced a law that would make the destruction of a zygote subject […]

Um, good one, Victoria Jackson?

What are America’s old white racist exurban cretins on Medicare and Social Security upset about today? Oh, the usual: Obama, liberals, gays, sex, black people, youth, hippies, the poor, the rich, Mexicans, “the hip hop,” Iran, exercise, unemployment, unemployment benefits, vegetables, a talented black woman with addiction problems such as Whitney Houston, organic farms, birth […]

Sociopathic kleptocrat billionaire Micheal Bloomberg came back from his castle on Bermuda to announce that buying three terms as New York’s mayor is the bestest present he could buy someone as awesome as himself, because he has “the seventh biggest army in the world” in the form of the NYPD, his own personal military force. […]

Sometimes there is a Cracker Jack™-style surprise waiting at the very bottom of another inane New York Times feature about the lifestyles and murderous rampages of America’s political leaders. And your beloved former Wonkette editor Jim Newell found just such a weird treat at the end of this bloodthirsty insanity about Dick Cheney bragging how […]

It’s not all bad news (or good news) today! Crazy second-amendment-remedy granny Sharron Angle has a new YouTube posted on the YouTube! And that is simply … weird? Comforting? Baffling? Let’s go with “comforting,” because when radiation rains down upon the American West this weekend, and kills everyone, we can at least know that some […]

Scruffy-cheeked Ivy League teabagger Joe Miller lost his crazed bid to become a senator last year, but the sore loser still thinks he’s got a place in politics. But will his ambitions survive his friendship with a 26-year-old white trash militia kid arrested for trying to kill a bunch of judges and cops? Who knows, […]

Southern California Nazis or whatever have painted graffiti in the Orange County town of Santa Ana informing new (again) Governor Jerry Brown that they will kill him next month. One message says “We’re gonna kill Gov. Brown 2/14/11″ and the other says “26 more days 4 Brown” and has a swastika instead of, we guess, […]

Almost everything of morbid interest about today’s mass shooting in Tuscon can be found in our previous post. The latest version of the news is this: Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords, a popular Democrat representing Arizona’s liberal refuge of Tuscon, was shot through the head by a suspect identified as 22-year-old Jared Loughner. Giffords is now out […]

Oh jesus fucking christ, they’re just doing this to get on Wonkette now. UPDATE: Haha, now this is a “private” video. Luckily, we’ve got another copy.

Wingnut anti-Muslim hysteria finally turned violent in New York this week, when a psychopathic rat-eyed 21-year-old blob obsessed with American soldiers and burning with insane hatred for American Muslims repeatedly stabbed a Manhattan taxi driver in the throat with one of those stupid “Leatherman” pocket knives. “I saw so much anger on his face, so […]

Nevada scribe Sharron Angle believes that the color black is satanic! Or at least she used to, before her campaign advisers started telling her to appear more “tolerant.” Senator Harry Reid also is satanic, which is why he’s making t-shirts with this design, which mocks Angle for once campaigning against black high-school football jerseys full […]

The socialists who run the city government of Gainesville, Florida, have denied a permit to the Dove World Outreach Center for its planned International Burn A Koran Day party on September 11, saying that the city’s burning ordinance prohibits open book-burning. But USA Today reports that Dove World’s online community manager or whatever sent out […]

Hey you guys, are you going to Glenn Beck’s “Restoring Honor” rally at the Lincoln Memorial on “8.28.10”? We should all carpool with Ted Nugent and Sarah Palin in their cars/snow machines and sing “Cat Scratch Fever” on the way, it will be so cool. But if their rides are full, then maybe our National […]