Tag: love

The Weekend Stock Photo Report Doesn’t Love America

In this installment of The Weekend Stock Photo Report with Weekend S. Photo, Rudy Giuliani is an asshole even by his standards, Bill O'Reilly is full of shit even by his standards, and Oklahoma is ignorant etc. Missed last week's...

Pastor Challenging Lindsey Graham Is A Dumb Piece Of Crap And Here’s Why

Ladies, it’s all your fault. Hopefully you realize this by now, because all the evidence is clear, and there is literally nothing that cannot be blamed on you. Like how you will divorce your husband just because he is...

My Gun-y Valentine, Sweet Semiautomatic Valentine

You know what says love? A gun says love. Just ask anyone who's in love with guns, like maybe Kathy Kieffer at TownHall: Forget roses. This Valentine’s Day, give her a gift that shows you love her whole body and...

Court To Cook County Attorney: No More Creeping On Teenagers, Please

It just isn't a good time to be a public figure in the Chicago area if you're into the teen girl thing. First everyone threw up in their mouths a little when Mel Reynolds announced he would run for...

John Edwards And Rielle Hunter Broke Up Last Week, Or Possibly In 2008

You guys, extra-sad news! John Edwards and Rielle Hunter, who as far as we knew six days ago were America's number one committed couple, are now totally broken up. Well, they're still a family, because when you...

Important Vanity Fair Barack Obama Nerd Love Update: Young Obama Wore Brut

It is going to take weeks to unpack all of this New Yorker-length Vanity Fair article "Portrait Of Obama As A Pretentious Young Man," but we at Your Wonkette know your carnal and emotional needs, and that is to...

Wingnut Insists Burning Korans On 9/11 Honors Allah And All His Friends

Now that Terry Jones is apparently Florida's #1 Muslin-loving chickenshit, the question still remains: Is there a more respectful way to showcase one's deep-seated hatred of the Muslim faith, or is burnin' some Queerans at your trailer park swamp...

BREAKING: LEVI AND BRISTOL TO PUT THE FINAL NAIL IN THE COFFIN OF HETEROSEXUAL MARRIAGE "Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston say they're engaged and hope to get married within six weeks in Alaska ... Palin and Johnston tell the...

The White Death Will Not Stop Love (Or Casual Sex)

Neither snow nor sleet, nor more snow and sleet, can stop what is coming this Sunday: Valentine's Day. BLAH BLAH BLAH, you either love Valentine's Day because you're happy and in love, or its mere presence makes you want...

Charlie Crist Fired His Communications Director In Elaborate Plot To Seduce THE POLITICO’s Ben Smith

Hated Florida governor Charlie Crist fired his longtime communications director this week. This is the only "political move" you can do, in politics. Ben Smith says that Crist, who amuses himself by doing public impressions of a married straight...

Secret Weiner-Abedin Engagement Finally Revealed!

Anthony Weiner, the Democrat who infuriated many libtards by refusing to run for New York mayor and saying mean things about Jon Stewart once, can infuriate them all over again by officially taking one of the cutest, most shiny-haired...

Mark Sanford’s Love Novel KILLED By Mean Old Conservative Publishers

Once upon a time, this nobody governor in, uhh, one of the southern states, but not a famous one like Florida, got a book deal. He was supposed to write about how to be conservative or something, A Southern...

True Love Will Prevail If Mark Sanford Follows His Hard-On

Republican star Mark Sanford pretty much came clean during his press conference! That is a rare thing with these people, and as a result, liberals everywhere are oohing and aahing, "Oh it's true love he wasn't even fucking street...

Wingnuts Angry That Obama Didn’t Suck Off Saudi King, Like Bush Always Did

Oh noes the wingnuts are very, very upset! Why? This street negro, Barack Obama, allegedly kowtowed to the Saudi King while meeting said Saudi King at the G-20. (The White House says, "Uhh, Obama is a lot taller than...

VD Posts Are a Nice Way To Break the Ice

Well, hopefully YOU have a date for Valentine's Day, you little minx you. Your Intern the Third will be sequestered, in mourning, at one of the these fine drinking establishments. Thursday, Feb. 12: Stock up on hobo beans, or whore...

Love Is In The Air

By the Comics CurmudgeonAhh, what's that smell? Now that the election is over and there's a brief respite from the never-ending stream of bullshit, we can catch a whiff of sweet romance! They don't call the period...