Tag: local news

Montana Sheriff To Ragemonster Republican Thug Greg Gianforte: ¯_(ツ)_/¯

What's a little aggravated assault between friends?
The devil's in my car

Nice Lady Sees Devil Symbol In School Bus Lights, Gets On TV

From Memphis, Tennessee, we have this important news of demon-possessed bus tail lights, thanks to easily upset Christian lady Robin Wilkins, who saw a star pattern in the LED taillights of a school bus. She decided it was a...

Lady Mayor of Minneapolis Is A Thuggy Thuggy Finger-Pointing Gang-Banger

KSTP-TV, an ABC affiliate in Minneapolis, dropped a nuclear newsbomb on its Thursday EYEWITNESS NEWS broadcast: the city's Democratic mayor, Betsy Hodges, was consorting with gang members and had perhaps even been recruited herself. Intrepid reporter Jay Kolls, sensing he'd found The...

Sixth-Grade Virginia Girl Gets Zero-Toleranced For Saving Classmate From Cutting Himself

This young lady is Adrionna Harris, a sixth-grader at Bayside Middle school in Virginia Beach, Virginia. And she is a pretty decent kid who did a pretty cool thing: last week, when she saw a classmate cutting himself with...

Dig Your Ground: Shovel-Toting Student Freaks Out Idaho Middle School, Resulting In Lockdown

Staff and parents at a middle school in the Boise suburb of Meridian, Idaho, pretty much lost their shit when a student carrying a folding "military style" short-handled shovel was mistaken for a maniac roaming the halls of the...

Illinois GOP Lawmaker Arrested in Animal Feed Bag-Related Incident

Illinois crazytime state lawmaker update alert newsbreak: GOP state Senator Suzi Schmidt, the curiously thrilled human pictured at left, was arrested for, uh, "damaging" an animal feed bag belonging to the neighbors and was later served with an "emergency...

Yes, ‘Tax Money Paying For Jailed Illegal Immigrants’ Sex-Change Hormones’

HOUSTON—Coming up tonight on 11 News at 10: Morning Anchor Christine Haas reveals some illegal immigrants are receiving sex change hormones while behind bars, and tax payers are footing the bill.  Here it is! The Perfect Storm! Is there any...

Don’t Look Now, But Alvin Greene Is Probably Standing Right Behind You

The candidate flows in and out, like The Way itself.

Jesus Romantic Chris Young Is Your Next Providence Mayor

Chris Young is a perennial mayoral candidate in Providence, Rhode Island. As you can see in the video above, he knows that the most important part of politics is pulling out a music recording and singing along to the...

GOOD THING YOU ARE ON THE INTERNET RIGHT NOW, AND NOT IN A SEX POSITION: A polite congratulations offered from a distance to the city of Washington, D.C. today, which the CDC just named the country's #1 gross hotspot...

POLITICO Fat Cat To Start POLITICO-Style Metro News Site

Good news, Washington humans: the rich right-wing owner of the POLITICO, Robert Albritton, is preparing to launch a local news website, with the admirable goal of further destroying the Washington Post. (Although the Washington Post has great local news...

Best Steve Doocy Clip Ever Discovered With Basic YouTube Search

Clip o' the century, folks, clip o' the century. Here is our favorite Fox & Friends star Steve Doocy wearing his mother's finest Christmas sweater in a DC local news segment from 1988. The story is about one "A-peeling...

Reporter Lady In Kerfuffle With Blagojevich, At Disneyworld

Wacky whore & fraud Rod Blagojevich, who was indicted on 16 counts of epic corruption in Chicago yesterday, is currently on vacation at the Florida amusement park Walt Disney World. Oh, and he is with his family. Some local...

ASSHOLES FROM POLITICAL BLOG RUIN JOURNALISM, AMERICA: People go so insane over words, on the Internet.

Bathrooms of the Media Elite