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Posts Tagged ‘lobsterbacks’

OUR FLOURISHING IMPERIAL REVIVALS

British Royal Empire Simply Does Not Care For Uighurs In Its Colony, Bermuda

Thursday, June 11th, 2009

No pants allowedThe whole notion of a “British Commonwealth” was supposedly just a cutesy, historic relic to rake in tourism dollars for everyone, and to allow England to pretend it’s still important, right? Well that may have been the situation at, say, 7:30 a.m. on September 11, 2001, but only a couple hours later the world changed, and terrorism was invented. And now the Britons have learned that one of its commonwealth islands, Bermuda, got drunk last night and accepted four of the seventeen Uighurs from Guantanamo Bay, without asking the Queen’s permission, in an obvious Security Risk. Time to bring in the Lobsterbacks, to slaughter Bermuda into submission. MORE »


PUNDITS

Who Are America’s Top Political Pundits, According To Lobsterbacks?

Friday, May 2nd, 2008

The UK’s Telegraph publication completed its list of “the 50 most influential US political pundits” today with the top ten, and it’s only half-retarded. The big problem is that Matt Drudge comes in at #6, when there is no question that he should be #1. No one else on this list would have anything to say, and say all too often, if it weren’t for Matt Drudge. You really cannot underestimate this. Stupid England. [Telegraph]


THANKSGIVING

Britain Loses Tax Data of 25 Million Redcoats

Wednesday, November 21st, 2007

whoop that trickWhile we’re having Thanksgiving this week, our ex-overlords in Britain are losing tax records:

[British Finance Minister Alistair] Darling was yesterday forced to explain to lawmakers how two unencrypted disks containing records of 7.3 million families claiming child-benefit payments had gone missing from the tax authority, which is overseen by the Treasury. The loss, the largest of its kind in U.K. history, lays open the 25 million people named in the data to the risk of fraud and theft. (emphasis ours)

LOLengland. This is what you get for taxing our fucking tea and stamps. [Bloomberg]