Oh dudes here is a SCURRILOUS RUMOR we just received, possibly from somebody in America’s Meth/Tattoo Capital of Wasilla, Alaska. The email is, uh, difficult to follow. But the central claim is this: Sarah Palin doesn’t even put that lipstick on her mouth, because it’s a TATTOO. Oh jesus christ, she is so gross, especially if this is true. MORE »

WHY DO ALL REPUBLICANS HATE SARAH PALIN BY TALKING ABOUT PIGS & LIPSTICK? “We’ve got 56 days until the election. How many of them can McCain spend hiding behind Palin’s skirt?” [Reason]

Ugh. We hate to add anything to today’s bullshit “THAT’S OFFENSIVE” fake outrage from McCain’s bizarre campaign, but here’s video of Ol’ Man Walnuts saying today’s “I am now pretending there is something unique or weird about this common phrase” saying, about respected woman Hillary Clinton, complete with some humorless libtard’s “Pop Up Video”-esque captioning. Whatever. [YouTube]

Nobody is allowed to talk about lipstick and various animals you would put it on, unless you are Sarah Palin. For example, when Barack Obama was talking about the Republican health care plan and called it “putting lipstick on a pig,” this was obviously a Sexist and demeaning SMEAR against the vice presidential candidate, who already made it clear that she was a bloodthirsty and vicious dog, not a cuddly, sensitive, intelligent little pig. Barack Obama needs to confine his language to simple one-syllable words and not use elitist compound nouns anyhow. [Political Punch]