Welcome to the last night of this horrid week, which started with a hurricane and ends with an old man struggling to read a teleprompter — an American Journey, really. Anyway, your entire Wonkette Team is here, at the Xcel Center, just plain eatin’ sandwiches and typing, from tables on the Club Level (?), and we will liveblog things such as John McCain’s speech, or maybe we’ll just burst out of here with the usual disgust in about an hour, and blog from Liffey’s Pub, again & forever. Let’s glance over the Lindsey Graham and Tom Ridge speeches that are embargoed, okay? MORE »

This is from the very special MSNBC.com “Candidate Brain Trusts” section, where you can learn about all the terrible careerists advising Our Candidates. Apparently Sen. Lindsey Graham, who definitely talks like a Gay and is very unmarried, is, in fact, one of John McCain’s many secret gay friends in Congress. [MSNBC]

John McCain’s favorite friend-with-benefits, South Carolina Sen. Lindsey Graham, today brought to the world’s attention an interesting fact: WALNUTS! has done more for Global Warming Change than Al “Global Warming = Peace” Gore. MORE »

John McCain’s latest e-mail came from… Senator Lindsey Graham! Apparently Graham joined his Mexican-loving colleague on his trip to Iraq for Thanksgiving, where the two wined and dined on some local fresh market fruit, said heya to the troops, maybe did each other a little bit. Too immature? Just look at that love letter! Oh my, these here boys and their Latino-spicy burrito love.

This is a picture of Senator Lindsey Graham holding a sign that says “OBAMA OSAMA AND CHELSEA’S MOMA SAI CUT Y RUN !!!” and no, we don’t know what he has against modern art. [TMZ]

Ok, the Gates confirmation hearings are boring as hell. Gates is a total sycophant, and is telling the committee whatever they want to hear. Senator Reed looks as hungover as we are. Gates is folksy as hell. MORE »

• Heard on the Hill: The new issue of GQ features an obviously doctored photo of Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-SC)… House Speaker Dennis Hastert is encouraging a boycott of Miller Brewing Company after they sponsored pro-immigration rallies in his district… Senator Chuck Schumer grew a beard and went to Paris on vacation. [Roll Call]
• Yeas and Nays: The House’s new anti-Horse slaughter bill is being considered partly due to the influence of horse-lover Bo Derek… Chief Justice John Roberts’ six-year-old son: “Let me explain the government to you. There’s God, then there’s the president and then there’s my father.” [Examiner]
• D.C. Confidential: Karl Rove’s stepdad: gay. [Radar]
• Under the Dome: Pink magazine says nine women have a “good shot” at the presidency. [The Hill]
• Page Six: The following people are in New York seeking money for a presidential run: John Edwards, Mark Warner, Joe Biden, Evan Bayh, and John Kerry. [NYP]

The American political elite are enviable in so many ways. Doesn’t everyone wish they had a really good-looking family, like Dick Gephardt’s? Or a culturally sensitive patriarch, like Karl Rove? Perhaps there is more admiration for our great athletes — like Yankees players Mike Mussina and Alex Rodriguez, who both have tons of fans — even if Jeff Gannon isn’t one. In any case, just sit back and have a beer like Tim Russert, or go Patrick Kennedy-style with an iced tea — there’s lots more wonk’d after the jump.

There’s no way that baseball hats and sunglasses can keep any celebs from getting wonk’d by you hardworking tipsters. Once you’ve discovered their charade, email us, with “Wonk’d” or “Sighting” in the subject line (and the name of the “brity” that should have known better). You keep a sendin’, we’ll keep a postin’, and they’ll keep pretendin’ to be surprised when they’re spotted.

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In this edition of Chatology, Department of Homeland Security head Michael Chertoff pulls a half-Ginsburg, spinning through both Meet the Press and This Week. On various issues, Chertoff blames Michael Brown, Mary Matalin blames the media, Joe Lieberman blames Chertoff, Evan Bayh blames the Democrats, and David Gregory blames himself. Random wisdom from Ari Fleischer: “You can be right and still be bonkers.” Speaking of which: Cheney is “almost like the wizard dealing with the muggles” — Howard Fineman.

Full rundown and highlights after the jump.

[Ed. note: Don't miss Ana Marie Cox's appearance at the National Press Club, this Wednesday, February 22, at 6:30 PM. For more details, as well as information about how to obtain tickets to this free event, click here.]

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• Hearings heat up as Samuel Alito says Roe may be reexamined; his wife leaves the room in tears. [WP, NYT, NYT, USAT, WT, LAT, LAT]
• Democrats press Alito on Concerned Alumni of Princeton; “whatever the charge’s merits, it drew blood.” Alito: “I would never be a member of an organization that took those positions.” [WP, WP, WT, LAT]
• Sen. Graham (R-S.C.) to Alito:

• Samuel Alito speaks publicly for the first time: “Good judges are always open to the possibility of changing their minds based on the next brief that they read, or the next argument that’s made by an attorney who’s appearing before them, or a comment that is made by a colleague during the conference on the case.” [WP, NYT, WSJ, USAT, WT, LAT]
• 58% of Americans believe there is “widespread corruption in Washington,” according to fresh WP-ABC News poll; strong majorities approve of sweeping reforms of the lobbying industry. 53% in USAT-CNN poll believe the Abramoff scandal is major. [WP, USAT]
• Reps. Roy Blunt (R-Mo.) and John Boehner (R-Ohio) are the last contenders standing in the race for House majority leader; race seen as “wide open.” [WP, NYT, WT, LAT]
• FISA judges have rare private meeting at the Justice Department to discuss the eavesdropping program. [NYT]
• Confirmation hearings illustrate “a clear disconnect between the zeal of activists and the detachment of the general public.” Pollster: “You’re going to have to really get some significant news out of these hearings to move the needle in a negative way.” [WP, NYT]
• Alito’s views on the legal footing of NSA eavesdropping will be key component of the hearings. [NYT]
• Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.) on Alito: “He was nervous. He was more human than Roberts.” [NYT, WP]

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• Former Sen. Tom Daschle (D-S.D.) says Congress rejected White House request for the authority to eavesdrop on U.S. citizens: “I can state categorically that the subject of warrantless wiretaps of American citizens never came up. I did not and never would have supported giving authority to the president for such wiretaps. I am also confident that the 98 senators who voted in favor of authorization of force against al Qaeda did not believe that they were also voting for warrantless domestic surveillance.” [WP, WP]
• Congress has turned on Bush. Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.): “What you have seen is a Congress, which has been AWOL through intimidation or lack of unity, get off the sidelines and jump in with both feet.” [WP, LAT]
• Republican lawmakers “largely have themselves to blame for the muddled and haphazard finale of the Congressional session.” [NYT]
• House and Senate extend the Patriot Act for five weeks, pushing fight into the new year. [WP, NYT, LAT]
• Bush approves reduction of U.S. combat forces in Iraq; troop level could fall to 130,000. [WP, USAT]
• John Yoo, “a mere deputy assistant attorney general in the legal counsel office,” was the main author of controversial legal policies; viewed as an aggressive force among conservative legal scholars. Yoo: “If you’re being criticized for what you did and you believe that what you did was right, you shouldn’t take it lying down. You should go out and defend yourself.” [NYT]
• Michael Brown warned Tom Ridge in 2003 that the bureaucracy of the DHS would strangle FEMA’s effectiveness: “People became distracted from the mission, because we spent so much time and energy fighting for resources and working on reorganization. It just disintegrated our capacity.” [WP, WT]

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• Reliable Source: Filming begins on new movie about Robert Hanssen starring Chris Cooper and Ryan Phillippe. . . Reps. Anthony Weiner (D-N.Y.) and Ileana Ros-Lehtinen (R-Fla.) seek nonimmigrant classification for fashion models. [WP]
• Inside Politics: Wall Street Journal editorial board urges Sens. Feingold and Graham to run in ‘08. [WT]