Jesus god, Barack Obama’s new fortified palace/romper room/communications center/car looks like it just drove out of the Thunderdome. It is a hideous multi-paneled Wagon of Doom that shoots laser beams out of its headlights and can decapitate a man. It was forged in the fiery furnaces of hell and custom-finished by leather-tongued demons who poured the Elixir of Pan into the gas tank, for greater fuel economy. Early reports say it is a Cadillac. [CNN]