Violent English pixie Lily Allen apparently called our president a “F****** C***,” which is cockney rhyming slang for “lucky grunt,” a common British term of affection. [Lily's Bush Outburst [MTV]

A potential disaster was averted by quick-thinking border guards at LAX as they revoked the work visa for diminutive British pop star Lily Allen. Thanks to red tape and foreigner-coddling laws passed by the liberals in Congress, they weren’t able to evict the sinister pixie from the country altogether, but without her visa she will be unable to infect American minds with her ultra-catchy brand of reggae-infused pop. MORE »