Tag Archives: libertarianism

  Who Will Be His Secretary of Patchouli?

Sure, Rand Paul Is Now A Tree Hugger, Why Not?

Oh, wow...his vibe is groovy for like 5 minutes, and then he's, like, a massive bummer
In yet another attempt to convince people who aren’t paying attention that he’s a totally different kind of Republican, Rand Paul has come out as a self-proclaimed “tree hugger” who thinks composting is groovy and that clean air and water are good things. These and other exciting revelations are in Paul’s exciting new book-shaped object that you couldn’t pay us enough to read, Taking a Stand: Moving Beyond Partisan Politics to Unite America, in bookstores today and coming soon to a remainders shelf near you. Read more on Sure, Rand Paul Is Now A Tree Hugger, Why Not?…
  a greeter in every camp

Fox’s John Stossel Will Turn Over All Disaster Relief To Our Benevolent Walmart Overlords

always with the props, dude
Insipid Libertarian Mario Brother John Stossel once again showed why he sits at the Smart Kids’ table on Fox News trips to Dave & Busters’. Speaking to Frozen Meatloaf scion Tucker Carlson, Stossel made the case that we’d all be much better off with a government small enough to drown in a bathtub, especially if our compassionate brothers and sisters at Walmart Inc. were tabbed to be first responders for all future drownings. Read more on Fox’s John Stossel Will Turn Over All Disaster Relief To Our Benevolent Walmart Overlords…
  libertarianism now libertarianism tomorrow libertarianism forever

Ron Paul Escapes Tethers In Son’s Basement, Heads To Fun Secession Conference For Fun

You know who else served stale croissants while yammering about liberty to a crowd?
How much fun are we going to have in 2016 watching a couple of the candidates in the GOP clown car gagging their insane fathers, shoving them into canvas sacks and dumping them into the Potomac, only to have the crazy old men chew through the gags and the canvas and paddle to the surface, where they will suck in lungfuls of air and begin spouting off about tyranny and bitcoins? Hang on, we’ve got to wipe off our keyboard. Read more on Ron Paul Escapes Tethers In Son’s Basement, Heads To Fun Secession Conference For Fun…
  Fulsome Prison Blues

Charles Koch Wishes Courts Would Give All Billionaires An Even Break

Yer basic captain of industry, he is.
Squillionaire Charles Koch, having reshaped the legislative and regulatory landscape a bit more to his liking over the past few decades, is planning to do some exciting renovations to the judicial branch of government next. But don’t worry! He’s not out to get more lenient sentences for perpetrators of white-collar crime, because rich guys never go to prison anyway. No, Charles Koch and his top attorney say this new focus on judicial reform is all about making the justice system fairer for the little guy. Trust him. Read more on Charles Koch Wishes Courts Would Give All Billionaires An Even Break…
  2 bongs 1 cupp

S.E. Cupp Writes Stupidest Possible Column On Pot

Wow, Gary was right! Leggy Fox News CNN Idiot S.E. Cupp truly has taken the lead for the dumbest column of 2014, and it’s going to take some massive expenditures of PunditDerp to surpass her thought-like statements about marijuana. It’s also depressing to know that someone will pull it off anyway. If nothing else, it at least proves that pot can make some people stupid even if they don’t ingest any at all. So here’s the dealio: Cupp believes that marijuana legalization could turn out to be a very bad thing for liberals, because it’s wildly inconsistent with other parts of the progressive agenda — or at least “the progressive agenda” as imagined by S.E. Cupp’s strange libertarian mind. For instance, just take guns — please! Read more on S.E. Cupp Writes Stupidest Possible Column On Pot…
  flip-floppers

Weird Letters Show Kochs Briefly Drank Libtard Juice In Seventies

As dim Americans continue to stare blankly through the hazy toxic clouds of cable news teevee noise-static and ask, “hennnrrhhggh why are all the Wall Street protester hippies against capitalism and freedom, hrnngghh,” the intrepid reporter-folks over at The Nation meanwhile managed to uncover a series of letters from the 1970s indicating that America’s most noxious billionaire kleptocrat demon space lizards the Koch Brothers briefly abandoned their scheme to dismantle the social safety net for the half-hour or so it took them to write socialist propaganda pamphlet-screeds trying to convince an ill Austrian economist covered under his country’s universal health care program that he wouldn’t die in the United States if he came to work for them, because he was eligible for Medicare.  Read more on Weird Letters Show Kochs Briefly Drank Libtard Juice In Seventies…
  the r3volution is now airborne

Bored With Blimps, Paultards Will Now Begin Jumping Out of Planes

Blimps, they are so 2008. Why have a blimp when you can have it rain actual Paultards all over your New Hampshire campaign event? Skydivers will jump from a helicopter over Derry on Sept. 29 for an aerial display and then land in a residential yard, highlighting a special question-and-answer session about the future of the nation with Presidential Candidate Ron Paul. Read more on Bored With Blimps, Paultards Will Now Begin Jumping Out of Planes…
  booooooooooooo

Lindsey Graham, Liar: ‘Ron Paul Is Not The Leader Of This Party’

Mean old fartsack Lindsey Graham spoke at the “South Carolina GOP Convention” this weekend and made an enemy of RON PAUL and his supporters, the Paultards, by denouncing libertarianism and Liberty. And then he told everyone to leave, because Jim DeMint was about to shoot a firecracker out of his ass. Read more on Lindsey Graham, Liar: ‘Ron Paul Is Not The Leader Of This Party’…