Tag Archives: liberals

  violent love (of freedumb)

Ted Nugent Is Very Concerned About All This Rape. Of the Constitution. By Libruls.

Constitutional scholar, NRA board member, and serial fact assaulter Ted Nugent, miraculously still neither dead nor in jail, would just like America to know that we do not need to fear easy access to guns by ordinary Americans like Adam Lanza (no prior convictions) or James Holmes (no priors) or Jared Loughner (possession of drug paraphernalia and defacing a street sign). No, what Americans really need to fear are the “subhuman maggots” who “belong in cages,” but who Liberals constantly let out of prison alla time because liberals just love letting felons out of prison. So by focusing instead on trying to make deadly weapons just a little bit more difficult to obtain, Liberals are the real criminals who “rape our Constitution and urinate on the vision of our Founding Fathers.” Sounds like a thesis! Liberals are always the ones who want to try reasoning with the slime-drooling alien monsters in science fiction movies, after all. Read more on Ted Nugent Is Very Concerned About All This Rape. Of the Constitution. By Libruls….
  burn him

Idaho Teacher Said ‘Vagina’ During Class On Reproduction But Probably Won’t Get Fired

Sorry, good Christian Wonkers, but it looks like Idaho biology teacher Tim McDaniel, WHO SAID VAGINA DURING A CLASS ON THE REPRODUCTIVE SYSTEM, is not going to get fired for his vagina-saying crime spree. Instead he’ll probably just be reprimanded. Can we at least get a stoning up in this bitch? Tim McDaniel is being investigated after a complaint was filed by a handful of parents who objected to how McDaniel taught the reproductive system, Dietrich Superintendent Neil Hollingshead said. “It is highly unlikely it would end with his dismissal,” Hollingshead said. “Maybe a letter of reprimand from the school board.” According to McDaniel, four parents were offended that he explained the biology of an orgasm and included the word “vagina” during his lesson on the human reproductive system in a tenth-grade biology course. Oh, but that isn’t the only evidence of the indoctrinating he is trying to shove down Idaho schoolchildren’s throats, like a common Chester the Molester. Read the other terrifying allegations, after the jump! (Please remove all children and pregnant women from the room.) Read more on Idaho Teacher Said ‘Vagina’ During Class On Reproduction But Probably Won’t Get Fired…
  good guys and bad guys with guns

Yeah, No, Seriously, Los Angeles Spree-Killer Cop Is Really, *REALLY* Liberal

We have already read about what made Los Angeles spree-killin’ cop Christopher Dorner go Django on the entire LAPD (and their families). It was LAPD racisms. So we know who (and what) he hates. But who does he love? Just about all your typical libtards, like Hillary Clinton and Larry David and Ellen Degeneres and Anderson Cooper and Joe Scarborough and Chris Christie and Jon Huntsman. What? After the jump, some extensive selections from his manifesto (this one uncensored), which we had kind of stopped reading after we got through the racisms parts, where he espouses best wishes for women in the military, Hillary (or Christie!) 2016, and burning hell for the Westboro Baptist Church and the NRA’s Wayne LaPierre, because nobody (including himself) needs the kind of fucking arsenal with which he is currently terrorizing the country’s second biggest metropolis, and where your Editrix is currently never leaving her apartment again. Read more on Yeah, No, Seriously, Los Angeles Spree-Killer Cop Is Really, *REALLY* Liberal…
  you're welcome

Nice Lady Goes On Epic 23-Minute Potty Rant Because Her Friends Didn’t Share Her Romney Posts On Facebook

The fact that shellymicAB’s Youtube rant is unembeddable is a crime against Wonkette. But for those of you who have been begging us to repeat our billion-post Tuesday schedule so as to keep schadening your Freude (unaware that we conducted Election Day, like the Iraq War, “off-budget”), well, here should be the happiest 25 minutes of your life. “Headphones up!” as the people with jobs say! [YouTube] Read more on Nice Lady Goes On Epic 23-Minute Potty Rant Because Her Friends Didn’t Share Her Romney Posts On Facebook…
  this bird you can change it turns out

Lynyrd Skynyrd Latest Victims Of Obama’s Thought Police

If there is one musical group that we know defends Real American Values, it’s Lynyrd Skynyrd. They bravely stood up for segregation and other forms of awesomeness, and while Jimmy Carter’s CIA managed to kill most of the original members in an “accidental” plane crash, a new version of the band was formed during the Reagan administration to spread the message everywhere that the South will rise again and such, often performing in front of a giant Confederate flag. But now even that is being taken away from us, because Obamabot mind-control operatives have brainwashed Lynyrd Skynyrd into a bunch of liberals who don’t want segregation and slavery restored, not even a little. Read more on Lynyrd Skynyrd Latest Victims Of Obama’s Thought Police…
  wonkette has left its couch

Your Wonkette Is At The Big Liberal Blog Conference, Taking Pictures And Such

Ugh, they spelled the name of this blog wrong again! It’s spelled “Guardian.” Anyway, your Wonkette is here at the 2012 Netroots Nation conference in little-who-cares-whatever state Rhode Island, to watch liberals “pop off” about the issues of the day. We’ve already had a vegetarian wrap for lunch and watched a movie about rape in the military, at the same time, within half an hour of arriving. Read more on Your Wonkette Is At The Big Liberal Blog Conference, Taking Pictures And Such…
  blog about blog about brett kimberlin day

The New Horrible Thing Liberals Are Responsible For: Some Bomber Dude

This special Memorial Day evening post comes courtesy of Wonkette Operative Doktor StrangeZoom. That’s right: Doktor StrangeZoom has saved Memorial Day! Just when you had finally figured out who the hell Saul Alinsky was, the right-wing blogosphere has found a brand new boogeyman to be terrified of: Brett Kimberlin, a convicted bomber, maybe murderer, and head of a liberal organization that no one’s ever heard of, the Justice Through Music Project, which has received funding from the Tides Foundation (George Soros!) and Barbra Streisand (Yentl!). Apparently, in addition to saving the world through music and lying about having sold pot to Dan Quayle, Kimberlin’s other hobby is destroying Free Speech by suing, harassing, stalking, and maybe trying to kill right-wing bloggers, at least according to several right-wing bloggers, who decided that last Friday would be “Blog About Brett Kimberlin Day,” so that the entire right-wing blogosphere could have a collective freakout about how the Left is threatening America yet again. As part of the festivities, Glenn Beck’s Serious News Operation The Blaze contributed a sober, carefully sourced exposé titled MEET SOROS-FUNDED DOMESTIC TERRORIST BRETT KIMBERLIN WHOSE ‘JOB’ IS TERRORIZING BLOGGERS INTO SILENCE. Read more on The New Horrible Thing Liberals Are Responsible For: Some Bomber Dude…
  intoleration nation

Study: Liberals All So Intolerant, Want Everyone to Die, on Facebook

Conservatives may be the club of the gay-haters, the uterus police, and the militant Islamophobes, but you liberals, you are the club of intolerance. New study proves it! Former press secretary to Laura Bush and Investors’ Business Daily blowhard Andrew Malcolm has the proof: “Not exactly shocking news for those exposed to them for years, but the respected Pew Research Center has determined that political liberals are far less tolerant of opposing views than regular Americans.” And if you are not a regular American, you are not American at all. So how did Pew Research come to this all-too-predictable conclusion? Read more on Study: Liberals All So Intolerant, Want Everyone to Die, on Facebook…
  day of atonement

Rush Limbaugh Sorry Liberals Made Him Be A Disgusting Liberal Like Them

In case you were wondering, beloved minstrel show performer Rush Limbaugh is “sincerely” “sorry” about the “two words” he called Sandra Fluke — slut and prostitute — and as anyone who is sincerely sorry does, took full personal responsibility for them by blaming liberals, who forced him to become a disgusting spewer of ad-hominem insults against nice ladies even though he did not mean them, like them. Blorgle snurfle phlegm, liberals have a “willingness to say or do anything to advance their agenda. But this is the mistake I made,” admitted Mr. Limbaugh, humbly. “In fighting them on this issue last week, I became like them. Against my own instincts, against my own knowledge, against everything I know to be right and wrong, I descended to their level, when I used those two words to describe Sandra Fluke, I became like them, and I feel very badly about that.” He continued, “I have always tried to maintain a very high degree of integrity and independence on this program.” “Integrity” and “independence” is not the language Your Wonkette would have used. Read more on Rush Limbaugh Sorry Liberals Made Him Be A Disgusting Liberal Like Them…
  lurch vs. robot

John Kerry: Mitt Romney Is No John Kerry

Political pundit people have been enjoying the idea that Mitt Romney has a “John Kerry problem.” After all, both Romney and Kerry are rich white establishment politicians — just like most politicians, on Earth. Political pundits love easy comparisons like that. But John Kerry took a break from whatever he does these days to say he’s met John Kerry, and Mitt Romney is no John Kerry. “I didn’t have trouble connecting,” Kerry said at some elitist New York speaking engagement. “I almost won the presidency.” Mitt Romney couldn’t even win Iowa, jeez! Read more on John Kerry: Mitt Romney Is No John Kerry…
  panderdized testing

Herman Cain Tells CPAC To ‘Outsmart Stupid People Running America’

Didn’t you sort of feel like Herman Cain said he was just going out for a pack of smokes, and then we never heard from him again and somehow got stuck with his car note and a bunch of boring creepo ‘Washington insiders?’ Well, CAIN’S BACK, BABY. Just goes to show you can’t keep a good grifter down, no matter how many of that grifter’s alleged side-pieces come out of the woodwork to force the timely demise of his book tour/presidential campaign. Cain took time out of his busy schedule to sidle up to CPAC and whisper some sweet nothings into its ear about how smart (and sexy) everyone there definitely is. Smarter than liberals, that’s for sure! Read more on Herman Cain Tells CPAC To ‘Outsmart Stupid People Running America’…
  muppets vs. muppets

Muppets Kermit & Miss Piggy Respond To Charges By Fox News Muppets

It is important that you watch this crucial Fox News Business report on the evil of the beloved Muppets, even if you already saw this clip in December. Why? Because the Muppets have finally responded to these treasonous charges, at a press conference — Miss Piggy even did a SMACKDOWN on the Fox News idiots. It’s a good thing Fox News viewers are all 67-year-old white trash sitting in their soon-to-be repo’d double-wides, because otherwise they would probably stop buying Muppet toys and movies! Read more on Muppets Kermit & Miss Piggy Respond To Charges By Fox News Muppets…
  forgotten wingnuts

Sam Brownback Insane With Rage After Twitter Insult By High School Girl

Not even Republican primary voters wanted Sam Brownback as a presidential candidate, so the right-wing nobody went back to Kansas, both metaphorically and literally. He’s governor of Kansas, apparently. And he’s still a thin-skinned jerk. We learned these facts from the cautionary tale of Emma Sullivan, an 18-year-old high school senior and member of the Youth In Government program. (The tale is cautionary for state-level wingnut creeps like Brownback.) During a field trip to the state capital, Sullivan was annoyed by Brownback’s dumb comments to the kids. So she wrote a joke on Twitter for her friends: “Just made mean comments at gov brownback and told him he sucked, in person #heblowsalot.” And then Brownback’s goblins found the joke online and tried to destroy this student’s life. Read more on Sam Brownback Insane With Rage After Twitter Insult By High School Girl…
  this guy again

Casey Anthony Trial Coverage Gives Rush Limbaugh Great Abortion Joke

Your Wonkette has been fastidiously trying to ignore anything related to this bizarre, sad Casey Anthony case, not only here but in life, because once upon a time there was such a thing as an “OJ Simpson trial,” which set everyone a very high bar for 24-hour reality crime shows that probably will never be touched. We are purists, sue us. But OKAY, we will weigh in, since bloated maggot Rush Limbaugh is humping America’s face with slime about abortion again. Here is Rush’s advice to the silly liberals who are upset about 2-year-old Caylee Anthony’s death: “When does the death of a child bother them? …just tell yourselves that [Anthony] just waited a couple of years to get an abortion and you’ll feel better.” Aha! Read more on Casey Anthony Trial Coverage Gives Rush Limbaugh Great Abortion Joke…
  and they're all on food stamps

Liberals Eat Fancy Healthy Food, Conservatives Eat Awful Garbage

According to a scientific survey of some people on the Internet somewhere, liberals eat the fanciest of fancy foods — while conservatives literally eat filthy garbage, mostly from fast-food anusburger chains. See if you can tell which meals were far more likely to be enjoyed by left-leaning humanists: coconut curry lamb and rice, fresh fruit, Pan Asian/French Fusion cuisine and organic vegetables. The answer, of course, is “All of them, Katie.” Because only liberals would even know what these foods are, and conservatives are eating another grease glob off their belly in the parking lot behind the Rite-Aid. Read more on Liberals Eat Fancy Healthy Food, Conservatives Eat Awful Garbage…
  america's great artists

Schmaltz Artist Pulls American Jesus Prints From ‘Liberal’ BYU Shop

Did you hear about liberal hate site “Groupon” sponsoring the racist Donald Trump’s racism? Groupon, you’re fired! What’s next? How about those liberals at the Mormon university? Yeah, how about them? A guy who makes prints of Jesus and the GOP Presidents and the Troops has pulled his precious artworks from the Mormon Church-owned Brigham Young University bookstore because … liberals? Yes. They were too liberal. So now you have to get this kind of art the same way everybody else does: by searching “Never Forget” on Google Images. Read more on Schmaltz Artist Pulls American Jesus Prints From ‘Liberal’ BYU Shop…