legitimate rape
Honestly, You Guys, ‘Not Raping’ Is Actually Really Easy
Today is International Women’s Day, which means two things. First, we have to listen to people say stupid things like: “I’m not a sexist, but why isn’t there an International Men’s Day?” The correct answer to that question is International Men’s Day is in November and the more correct answer is (read in your best [...]
Shocker: ‘Legitimate Raper’ Todd Akin Was Really Mean To Women, Has Insane Murdery Friend
Craaaazy news out of Missouri, everybody. You will not believe which of their politicians was arrested eight times at abortion clinics, then got himself elected to the state legislature. Would you believe it was Sen. Todd Akin (R-Uterus)? It was! As hard as it might be to believe, the guy who got all scandalized after [...]
Gentleman Scholar Todd Akin Laments Claire McCaskill’s Loss Of Ladydom
Todd “Legitimate Rape” Akin is back in the Missouri Senate race … because he never left it, son. Having weathered the storm caused by the liberal media pretending he thinks vaginas are washing machines for rape sperm (truth: he thinks they are car washes for rape sperm), Todd Akin now has to figure out how [...]
Todd Akin Explains Inner Workings of Democracy In Language You Can Understand
Here is a pressing question that might be keeping you up nights, particularly if you live in whatever district in Missouri Todd Akin (R-Ladiesman) represents: What if you want to tell Todd Akin how much he sucks? How do you know he will listen to you and absorb what is sure to be thoughtful and [...]
Mitt Romney To Nutter Rapey Doctor Last Year: ‘We Agree On Almost Everything’
You may have heard over the past few days of Dr. Jack Willke (because you read Wonkette with slavish devotion), the crazy man who spreads the lie that you can’t get pregnant if you’re goodly and righteously raped. You probably also heard that he was buddy-buddy with Mitt Romney in 2008, because Mitt Romney would [...]
Phyllis Schlafly And Bryan Fischer Pretty Much Think Todd Akin Is Jesus
Perfidious cockbucket Todd Akin received enthusiastic support Tuesday from noted insane persons Phyllis Schlafly and Bryan Fischer. Remarkably, this is not expected to hurt his chances for election to the US Senate. Reaching previously unplumbed depths of either cluelessness or chicanery — even for her — Ms. Schlafly carefully explained that Akin was not in [...]
Todd Akin Explains ‘Legitimate Rape’ To Mike Huckabee With Wheelchairs And 9/11
Yesterday, Rep. Todd Akin, who is the GOP nominee for the US Senate in Missouri, made a comment declaring that women who experienced “legitimate rape” could not get pregnant. Today, Man-Who-Used-To-Be-Skinny Mike Huckabee had Akin on his show to handhold him through a damage control interview. About two minutes in, Huckabee asks Akin if he [...]
Missouri Senate Candidate Todd Akin’s Guide to Legitimate vs. Illegitimate Rape
Missouri Congressman and GOP Senate candidate Todd Akin is a brilliant scientist (with a B.S. in something called “Management Engineering”) and is therefore highly qualified to speak on the intricacies of female anatomy, especially when it comes to the heretofore unknown magic powers of the reproductive system. Did you know, for example, that the uterus [...]
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