David Rees knows that you tentatively plan on touching yourself every time you see Sarah Palin on Fox News. David Rees, always judging! [True/Slant: David Rees] Do not even think about inviting Roger Ailes to your kegger, unless you want to get punched in the dick, as is his wont. [The Plank] The majority of […]

SEXY TIMES  6:26 pm November 15, 2009

by Jim Newell

BOOK LAWYERS ON THE LOOSE! Another website has received a cease-and-desist letter from HarperCollins’ lawyers for publishing full-page scans. We haven’t! But your editor has decided to delete the full-page excerpts we’ve published — for now — so he won’t have to care about this for the rest of the night.

Well thanks for clearing that up, “administration officials”! On Sunday Rahm Emanuel suggested that “those who devised policy” around torture wouldn’t be prosecuted, but by yesterday other Obama people were rushing to walk that one back. What he meant, apparently, was that officials who ordered the torture shouldn’t be prosecuted, but the lawyers who devised […]

QUITTERS  4:47 pm March 20, 2009

by Jim Newell

NORM COLEMAN’S LAWYER IS ‘DONE,’ SOMEHOW: Joe Friedberg, Norm Coleman’s recount attorney, tells Hotline, “Yes, I’m done,” after being asked if he is “done.” It is not clear whether this means he’s quitting, but it does mean that maybe someday, in 2025 or something, Norm Coleman’s legal challenges to his lost 2008 election will be […]

Attorney Edward Genson has abruptly quit his role leading the Gov. Blago defense team two days before the idiot’s impeachment trial begins in the Illinois Senate. Instead of listing the standard “personal reasons” or a professional conflict of interest, Genson cites that JESUS CHRIST HOW DO YOU WORK WITH THIS IDIOT: “I never require a […]

For further proof of just how bumblefuck a state Alaska is, look no further than the ease with which a couple of lawyers for the McCain campaign have destroyed the Troopergate investigation — which was a legitimate issue in Alaska for a while! — after half-assedly skimming off a few handy topic sentences from the […]

Every four years, a mysterious combination of negligence, incompetence, fraud, and criminality conspire to make a single state responsible for getting some doofus into the White House. In 2000, Florida took the honor; in 2004, it was Ohio. And every four years, Hendrik Hertzberg writes angry editorials about how the whole electoral college should be […]

One of the weirder angles on the John Edwards Sex Scandal is the part where the guy who says he’s Rielle Hunter’s baby daddy, Andrew Young, has to live in the same weird compound (OK FINE A “GATED COMMUNITY”) in North Carolina as Rielle Hunter, and then they all have to move to California, together, […]

Today in the exciting world of horse race politics: Obama lawyer tries to sneak into McCain lawyer conference call, gets rejected, is called sexist — and obvious political motives glue each development together! Jesus, this must be “Friday Night At The Movies” for Mark Halperin ‘n’ pals.

ALBERTO GONZALES  3:55 pm December 12, 2007

by Jim Newell

WONKETTE  10:44 am November 21, 2006

Wonkette Does Its Homework

by Alex Pareene

JESSICA CUTLER  3:14 pm June 26, 2006

Paging Jessica Cutler

by dlat