Tag Archives: lawyers

  major oily taitz

U.S. (Kenya) Supreme Court Refuses Orly Taitz’s Appeal

America’s top J.D.-D.D.S. Orly Taitz has somehow lost her chance to appeal the $20,000 fine levied on her by a federal judge in October for filing “frivolous” litigation that the LSM doesn’t want you to know about. Apparently the Supreme Court does not want to tear this woman apart, in what would be the most entertaining trial ever. Who’s at fault? YOU GUESSED IT, Samuel Alito, who hates fun and denied the request. But Orly’s fight is not over. She is now appealing the decision to “an international court of Human Rights.” Read more on U.S. (Kenya) Supreme Court Refuses Orly Taitz’s Appeal…
  blessing of the lawyers

Gulf Coast Lawyers, Your Recession Is Over!

We just finished listening to that BP investors’ conference call — because we are, ultimately, business journalists — and we’re really regretting not going to law school now like all the other poor journalists. That $20 billion in U.S. assets that BP is setting aside? It’s strictly for claims, not for fines, not for any kind of government penalty for the Terrible Oil Disaster. Let’s see let’s see what’s 50% of $20 billion? Oh, well it’s going to be a very good next seven or eight years for the Wonkette & Associates chain of storefront legal services retail locations! Come on in, Mister Dubious Shrimp Guy, and let’s tally up your losses if you hadn’t sold your boat in ’07. Read more on Gulf Coast Lawyers, Your Recession Is Over!…
  kept at sea for 40 hours

Deepwater Horizon Kept Oil Rig Survivors Detained Until They Signed Legal Documents

The workers who survived the awful explosion of the Deepwater Horizon/BP oil rig weren’t simply taken back to shore after their harrowing escape and rescue — instead, according to lawyers for the survivors and interviews with The Guardian, they were detained for up to 40 hours at sea, unable to even call their families until they had signed legal documents absolving Deepwater Horizon. Read more on Deepwater Horizon Kept Oil Rig Survivors Detained Until They Signed Legal Documents…
  reasons people hate washington

Evil Fired White House Counsel Whore-Dragon Greg Craig Will Save Goldman Sachs

Washington! “Goldman Sachs is launching an aggressive response to its political and legal challenges with an unlikely ally at its side — President Barack Obama’s former White House counsel, Gregory Craig. The beleaguered Wall Street bank hired Craig — now in private practice at Skadden, Arps, Slate, Meagher & Flom — in recent weeks to help in navigate the halls of power in Washington, a source familiar with the firm told POLITICO.” Read more on Evil Fired White House Counsel Whore-Dragon Greg Craig Will Save Goldman Sachs…
  rumors on the internets

Today Marks The Day Rush Limbaugh Squirmed Out Of Mrs. Limbaugh, And Into Our Hearts And Minds

David Rees knows that you tentatively plan on touching yourself every time you see Sarah Palin on Fox News. David Rees, always judging! [True/Slant: David Rees] Do not even think about inviting Roger Ailes to your kegger, unless you want to get punched in the dick, as is his wont. [The Plank] Read more on Today Marks The Day Rush Limbaugh Squirmed Out Of Mrs. Limbaugh, And Into Our Hearts And Minds…
  sexy times

BOOK LAWYERS ON THE LOOSE! Another website has received a cease-and-desist letter from HarperCollins’ lawyers for publishing full-page scans. We haven’t! But your editor has decided to delete the full-page excerpts we’ve published — for now — so he won’t have to care about this for the rest of the night. Read more on …
  heads will roll

‘The Lawyers, However, Are Another Story’

Well thanks for clearing that up, “administration officials”! On Sunday Rahm Emanuel suggested that “those who devised policy” around torture wouldn’t be prosecuted, but by yesterday other Obama people were rushing to walk that one back. What he meant, apparently, was that officials who ordered the torture shouldn’t be prosecuted, but the lawyers who devised the legal rationale maybe could. Read more on ‘The Lawyers, However, Are Another Story’…
  quitters

NORM COLEMAN’S LAWYER IS ‘DONE,’ SOMEHOW: Joe Friedberg, Norm Coleman’s recount attorney, tells Hotline, “Yes, I’m done,” after being asked if he is “done.” It is not clear whether this means he’s quitting, but it does mean that maybe someday, in 2025 or something, Norm Coleman’s legal challenges to his lost 2008 election will be over. [Hotline] Read more on …
  this guy again

Blago’s Head Attorney Quits, Because Client Is Insane

Attorney Edward Genson has abruptly quit his role leading the Gov. Blago defense team two days before the idiot’s impeachment trial begins in the Illinois Senate. Instead of listing the standard “personal reasons” or a professional conflict of interest, Genson cites that JESUS CHRIST HOW DO YOU WORK WITH THIS IDIOT: “I never require a client to do what I say, but I do require them to at least listen.” Read more on Blago’s Head Attorney Quits, Because Client Is Insane…
  trooper pooper

‘Troopergate’ Investigation To Wrap Up Before Anyone Involved Testifies

For further proof of just how bumblefuck a state Alaska is, look no further than the ease with which a couple of lawyers for the McCain campaign have destroyed the Troopergate investigation — which was a legitimate issue in Alaska for a while! — after half-assedly skimming off a few handy topic sentences from the Alaskan law code. Todd Palin and several other witnesses were subpoenaed to testify this morning, but no one bothered to show up, and the investigators don’t give a shit. And now the Alaskan legislator in charge of the investigation has announced that the probe will end, as originally scheduled, on October 10, without these key witness reports, cuz whatcha gonna do? Read more on ‘Troopergate’ Investigation To Wrap Up Before Anyone Involved Testifies…
  electoral high school

Which State Will Host This Election’s Worst Voting Debacle?

Every four years, a mysterious combination of negligence, incompetence, fraud, and criminality conspire to make a single state responsible for getting some doofus into the White House. In 2000, Florida took the honor; in 2004, it was Ohio. And every four years, Hendrik Hertzberg writes angry editorials about how the whole electoral college should be bombed from space as a Republican takes office yet again. So which state will we be able to blame when Sarah Palin is hastily sworn in as America’s 45th president after John McCain expires from gout and agues in the spring of 2009? Read more on Which State Will Host This Election’s Worst Voting Debacle?…
  the modern blended family

Magnificently Awkward Living Arrangements Took Key Role In Edwards Sex Cover-Up

One of the weirder angles on the John Edwards Sex Scandal is the part where the guy who says he’s Rielle Hunter’s baby daddy, Andrew Young, has to live in the same weird compound (OK FINE A “GATED COMMUNITY”) in North Carolina as Rielle Hunter, and then they all have to move to California, together, with their families, including Mrs. Young and their three children, because they are all in a terrible sex-induced Witness Protection Program. Read more on Magnificently Awkward Living Arrangements Took Key Role In Edwards Sex Cover-Up…
  high stakes electoral drama

McCain Campaign Very Creatively Plays Gender Card

Today in the exciting world of horse race politics: Obama lawyer tries to sneak into McCain lawyer conference call, gets rejected, is called sexist — and obvious political motives glue each development together! Jesus, this must be “Friday Night At The Movies” for Mark Halperin ‘n’ pals. Read more on McCain Campaign Very Creatively Plays Gender Card…
 

There’s nothing we can add to this: “A magazine published by the American Bar Association on Wednesday named former Attorney General Alberto Gonzales its Lawyer of the Year for 2007 — mostly for creating so much controversial news.The ABA Journal also picked Attorney General Michael Mukasey — Gonzales’ successor — to be its lawyer of the year for 2008 because he has to deal with the problems left when Gonzales resigned under fire last fall.” [AP] Read more on …
 

Wonkette Does Its Homework

Yesterday, we posted a fairly testy letter from former gossip columnist and all-time dog enthusiast Karen Feld. One of the many things she took issue with was our post earlier this month calling attention to her appearance on the guest list for the Institute for Fiduciary Education’s Leadership Award Dinner, on which Feld was listed with a media affiliation (Washington Post) that Feld is not actually affiliated with. Ms. Feld wrote: Read more on Wonkette Does Its Homework…
 

We Get Letters: Karen Feld Edition

Former Examiner gossip and queen-of-all-media Karen Feld has a small bone to pick with Wonkette. So she sat right down and wrote a letter to our bosses. It’s reprinted in its entirety after the jump, but here’s the gist: What documentation does he have that I suffer from dementia? And that I am a dog abuser? Pareene gets a stern, rambling talking-to, after the jump. Read more on We Get Letters: Karen Feld Edition…