• Heard on the Hill: A freelance photographer has been sneaking into the Senate Photo Studio. . . Rep. Adam Putnam (R-Fla.) catches a 360-pound shark. . . Chuck Norris meets his biggest fan, the Senate elevator operator. [Roll Call]
• Under the Dome: Glenn Close visits the Hill to save wild animals. . . Sen. Chuck Hagel (R-Neb.) is reaching out to the Polish-American vote. [The Hill]
• Rush & Molloy: National Enquirer uncovers photos of Rep. Patrick Kennedy dressed up as Michael Jackson. . . Rupert Murdoch on raising funds for Hillary: “It’s not a million-dollar raising. It’s got nothing to do with anything other than her Senate re-election.” [NYDN]
• Inside the Beltway: C-SPAN will add the major cities in congressional districts to their lower-third graphics. [WT]
• Lloyd Grove’s Lowdown: Laurie Dhue wins a free trip to Jordan at a party for Queen Rania. . . Ralph Nader gets a form letter response from Bill Clinton. [NYDN]
• Cindy Adams: What about a Gore-Clinton ticket? [NYP]

* Because what the New American Century really needs is some wife-beating nuke-dropping hard asses. Er, rather, more of them. [Crooks and Liars]
* Café Milano and a red carpet do not a celebrity make. Still, it’s good to see the Fox heads acting like a family, it even looks like Shep and Laurie Dhue have the same botox practitioner. [Fox News]
* When Duke Cunningham gets hookers, he only wants the best, and to be the best, ladies, you got to have these. The alarm feature is also good to distract the Federal agents who just busted into the room while you climb out the window. [Fleshbot]