Before starting out on our latest miserable journey into this muddy Randian hell, may we just NOTE that we have noticed various folks on the Internet writing about how lame and trite certain blogs are for covering the Teabaggers only because of that silly sexual double entendre, which is now a dead joke. Indeed it is a dead joke! It’s been dead for weeks! (Although certain incidents do bring it new life every now and then.) But we would call them “Teabaggers” even without the sexual innuendo, because it is a hilarious movement based around tea bags, so yeah, “Teabaggers.” This is the Republican Party now! There is much more fuel to this thing than a simple sex joke that OMG old people don’t understand! Anyway… ha ha, testicles. Let’s look at some pictures of human testicles! MORE »

This forbidden-lobbyist-love scandal is a stroke of good fortune for John McCain. Revelations that he may have landed a sizzling hot blonde half his age have brought a new aura of virility and sex appeal to the Spanish-American war hero’s ancient carcass. He is also being hailed by Christian conservatives for having the good taste to conduct a heterosexual extramarital affair. And now we learn the scandal has brought conservative talk radio’s most lovable personalities flocking to his bosom. According to Politico, “they have a common enemy” now. Meaning, of course, the terrorists. At the New York Times. MORE »

• Reliable Source: Barbara Bush sparks speculation that she’s engaged after she’s seen with a ring on the third finger of her left hand. [WP]
• Inside the Beltway: Laura Ingraham tells Brian Lamb to get “Queer Eye” to redesign the C-SPAN set. [WT]
• Page Six: Secret Service agent is assigned to investigate claims about Jenna Bush’s lost wallet; White House issues denials. [NYP]
• Cindy Adams: If Jeannine Pirro drops senate campaign in favor of running for attorney general, will Bill Weld run against Hillary? . . . Sen. Elizabeth Dole’s hair is lighter. [NYP]
• Rush & Molloy: Mike Wallace wants to question Bush: “What in the world prepared you to be the commander in chief of the largest superpower in the world?

• Washington Whispers: Condi enjoys globe-trotting. . . Rumor mill envisions Gore-Obama ticket in ‘08. . . Peter Pace, the new Joint Chiefs of Staff, encourages his minions to find balance in their life. . . 16% of Americans watch more than three hours of cable news per day, the Winston Group finds. [USN&WR]
• Cindy Adams: Stephanopoulos says Reid green-lighted Miers on behalf of Democrats. . . Woodruff says Fitzgerald is gunning for a conspiracy charge. [NYP]
• Page Six: Mary Cheney, Laura Ingraham, Major Garrett among guests invited by Mary Matalin and James Carville for book party. [NYP]