lamestream media
Koch Brothers Buying the Liberal Media Now
Hey, who’s tired of reading actual “information” in the handful of remaining legitimate news outlets quietly dying out in America? Persecuted swamp monsters Charles and David Koch are growing tired of watching their feudalist political philosophies maligned in the media, so they have looked around and said to themselves, “oh shit, let’s just buy the [...]
Oh No We Have Been Blinded By Our Sarah Palin-Induced Rage
dkawejfls sjdflksjdfklsd ejweufls what is even happening here, oh right we cannot see our keyboards to type, because we have been blinded by our inchoate rage! DAMN YOU SARAH PALIN, THE ONE TRUE BEACON OF LIBERTY (AND CLASS)! Damn your ENRAGENING EYES!
Fox News Droid Compares News Corp To Companies That Were Hacked
Mouth-breathing “Fox and Friends” commentator-of-the-day Bob Dilenschneider was roving around inside the decaying asbestos filling his skull cavity when he found this bizarre string of words to complain about all the media attention on the News Corp hacking scandal: “Citigroup, great bank. Bank of America, great bank. Are they getting the same kind of attention [...]
Sarah Palin Says She Only Kind of Quit Bus Tour, Also Quits Trip To Sudan
Quitting addict Sarah Palin is furious, on Facebook, that everyone figured out she quit her bus tour. Stopping the bus does not mean “quit.” It means, snowbillies need to take a vacation from their vacations sometimes. Palin was called home for “jury duty,” which is an Alaskan euphemism for salmon fishing and getting drunk. “Uh, our bad?” [...]
Stupid Palin Email Dump Media Frenzy Makes Fox News Poll Kind of Fun
Unlike everyone else furiously competing to uncover new humiliating details within Sarah Palin’s thousands of newly released emails like greedy children searching for a Wonka golden ticket, Fox News reporter Greta Van Susteren will just conduct this slanted, simplistic poll about whether the media is being annoying. The answer is still yes! Congratulations, Lame Stream [...]
Sarah Palin Unable To Quit Whining Cold Turkey
With Michele Bachmann about to embark on her run for president and make Teabaggers forget about Sarah Palin forever, now’s not the time for old Lou to be abandoning her tried and true methods of getting attention. But that’s just what she seemed to do the other day, when she promised to quit “whining” about [...]
Sarah Palin Says She’s a ‘Duck,’ Will Stop ‘Whining’
This woman is getting dangerously close to becoming self-aware. “I’m through whining about a liberal press that holds conservative women to a different standard because it doesn’t do any good to whine about it,” she said. What will be the point of her life if it’s not take umbrage and whine about everything? That’s her [...]
Rush Limbaugh ‘Cannot Possibly Relate’ To Media Person’s Crude Commentary
Some radio producer lady who used to be on the liberal smear forum JournoList has apologized for once writing there that if she saw national treasure Rush Limbaugh having a heart attack she would “laugh loudly like a maniac and watch his eyes bug out.” No one is more appalled by this disgusting talk than [...]
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