Tag Archives: lamar alexander

  You click now

Fine, Here Is Today’s Elizabeth Warren Video For You To Fap To

Now sit up straight and learn some stuff
So Senate Republicans have a shiny new thing they’re calling the Congressional Review Act on Ambush Elections (S.J. Res. 8), and it’s terrible and dumb because of course it is. The resolution would prevent the National Labor Relations Board from implementing new proposed rules to modernize union elections to make the process more efficient for workers. But because Republicans hate unions and elections and workers and efficiency, they’d rather keep the system from the last century, to protect poor oppressed employers from being “ambushed” by the democratic process. Read more on Fine, Here Is Today’s Elizabeth Warren Video For You To Fap To…
  Meet The New Plan: Same As The Old Plan

GOP Pinky-Swears They Will ‘Fix’ Obamacare, If We Just Let Them Smash It To Bitses

Packed by weight, not volume
Just in case the Supreme Court strikes down Obamacare’s subsidies for people who bought health insurance on the federal exchange, three Republican senators have written an important Op-Ed in the Washington Post to reassure Americans that “We have a plan for fixing health care.” It’s a pretty impressive plan that should allay the worries of the 6 million Americans who signed up through the federal marketplace that they’ll suddenly be unable to afford decent insurance. Again. Read more on GOP Pinky-Swears They Will ‘Fix’ Obamacare, If We Just Let Them Smash It To Bitses…
  Education Nice Time!

Obama Proposes Free Community College; Will Terrify Wingnuts With Educated Populace

Bluto studied Photoshop at Estes Kefauver Community College
Now here’s a nice thing if you’re into “education” and “free stuff,” which of course you are, because you’re an over-educated socialist liberal. President Obama is heading to Tennessee today to announce a program that would provide qualified students with two years of free community college, as well as other reforms aimed at making higher education more accessible. Tell us more, New York Times: Read more on Obama Proposes Free Community College; Will Terrify Wingnuts With Educated Populace…
  Weep Weep For Your Fallen Heroes

Victoria Jackson, Stacy Campfield Fare Worse In Tennessee Elections Than Confederate Army At Vicksburg

On a day like today, only a crying eagle and an American flag will do.
Sad, sad, sad news out of the great state of Tennessee, where two Wonkette favorites went down to defeat on Thursday in their campaigns for public office. Get out your hankies, people, for today we weep for comedy and for America. Read more on Victoria Jackson, Stacy Campfield Fare Worse In Tennessee Elections Than Confederate Army At Vicksburg…
  cheerleaders auxiliary is a good auxiliary

Union Thugs Get Greasy Hands On College Sportsball

The National Labor Relations Board handed down a 24-page decision saying Northwestern University sportsball players are employees of the university and may form a union. Quarterback Kain Colter has been the face of the pro-unionization campaign. It’s no surprise this happened in Chicago, one of the last bastions of organized labor activity with balls. Read more on Union Thugs Get Greasy Hands On College Sportsball…
  america needs funnier scandals

Lamar Alexander’s Aide And The Lighter Side of Child Porn Allegations

Oh, damn, Wonkers, you know what the adorable kittens mean, don’t you? The adorable kittens mean we have a story about something terrible and we’re going to try to buffer it with something sweet and cute. Does that work, or is it just going to make you guys start feeling sad whenever you see an adorable kittycat? So let’s just get it over with: Tennessee Sen. Lamar Alexander’s chief of staff, Ryan Loskarn, is the subject of a child pornography investigation. Loskarn was taken away from his home in handcuffs this morning while agents from the Postal Service searched his home. Yick. We will try very hard to make an amusing joke about the Postal Service being the ones investigating this nastiness… um… something something we never get our kiddie porn delivered on time? No? Read more on Lamar Alexander’s Aide And The Lighter Side of Child Porn Allegations…
  It's Not Socialism If Republicans Like It

Republicans Decide Socialism Is Awesome After Obama Proposes Privatizing Tennessee Valley Authority

If you’re looking for an example of how government can help people and businesses by spending money and making stuff happen for them (aka socialism), you could do a lot worse than the Tennessee Valley Authority. Created in 1933 by a Democratic Congress and enthusiastically executed by American Zeus Franklin Delano Roosevelt, the TVA was transformative for people living in one of the country’s shittiest regions during one of the country’s shittiest times, where everyone had malaria and nobody knew how to farm and nobody had the electrick zoom juice, even. So the TVA fixed all that (pretty much) and then decided to keep hanging around and being awesome to this very day. It’s still run by Uncle Sam and still sells electricity to about 9 million customers without costing a cent in taxes. In fact, the company generates hundreds of millions of dollars of tax-equivalent revenue each year! So obviously our right-wing President Barack Obama has proposed selling off the TVA to the private sector in his 2014 budget proposal, and the socialist Republicans in Congress are hell-bent on stopping him! Read more on Republicans Decide Socialism Is Awesome After Obama Proposes Privatizing Tennessee Valley Authority…
  punt contrapunt

Senator Lamar Alexander: HHS Chief Kathleen Sebelius Sold Arms To Iran To Fund Obamacare

Why is total mob capo of the DHS HHS Kathleen Sebelius shaking down companies to send arms to Iran so it can rape Nicaraguan nuns? This is an excellent question, one posed just this week by Tennessee Senator Lamar Alexander, previously known for being the boring guy who ran for president before Jon Huntsman whose most exciting personality quirk was wearing plaid. Here, let us let ThinkProgress parse it at ya. In an op-ed published in the Wall Street Journal on Wednesday, Sen. Lamar Alexander (R-TN) charged that Sebelius circumvented Congress’ refusal to provide funds for the administration’s health care law by raising those dollars from outside groups, just as “Col. North was accused of using money raised in an arms-for-hostages swap with Iran to fund and work with private organizations providing military support to rebel armies in Nicaragua.” […] “With Iran-Contra, Congress had also prohibited support for the rebels, while in the case of health-care funding, Congress has refused to provide the amounts that the administration has asked for,” Alexander wrote. “But the principle and the legal prohibitions are the same.” Republican chairmen and ranking Republicans on five congressional committees have asked the Government Accountability Office to look into the matter. Well, we certainly don’t see any difference there, do you? Certainly not that one was secretly selling arms to a hostile nation, to secretly fund an outfit that Congress had specifically prohibited funding because of all the nun-raping, and that the other was getting funds for something that was in fact legislated by Congress? Hahaha, just kidding, that would be a stupid contrast. Read more on Senator Lamar Alexander: HHS Chief Kathleen Sebelius Sold Arms To Iran To Fund Obamacare…
  Find The Goof And Raze It

Ghost Breitbart Celebrates MLK Day By Trashing ‘Roots’ & Linking To Stormfront

When former (Republican) senator Lamar Alexander quoted Alex Haley, the author of Roots, at the Inauguration yesterday, Breitbart-remnant writer John Nolte knew exactly what was called for! You see, Alexander was a close friend of Haley (despite being a Republican — weird, right?), and invoked the late writer while introducing Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor: “The late Alex Haley, the author of ‘Roots,’ lived his life by these six words: ‘Find the good and praise it.’ Today we praise the American tradition of transferring or reaffirming immense power as we inaugurate the president of the United States.” For Nolte, it was as if the Dick Signal was lighting up the clouds on a moonless night. The minute he heard “Find the good and praise it,” he rushed to the Interwebs of Justice and “tweeted out the fact that Haley’s seminal work was a fraud”: Read more on Ghost Breitbart Celebrates MLK Day By Trashing ‘Roots’ & Linking To Stormfront…
 

Gossip Roundup: Play Ball

• Reliable Source: Mark Plotkin wants to see a basketball match between Goergetown and George Washington. . . Little League Softball World Series winners sit for White House photo. [WP] • Inside the Beltway: Sen. George Allen (Vir.), Gov. Haley Barbour (Miss.), Asa Hutchinson, Sen. Bill Frist (Tenn.), Sen. Lamar Alexander (Tenn.), Gov. Mike Huckabee (Ark.), and Mitt Romney have confirmed their attendance at the Southern Republican Leadership Conference. [WT] • Rush & Molloy: Michael Chertoff defends appointment of Julie Myers. [NYDN] • Page Six: Gennifer Flowers is “extremely disappointed” her case was dismissed. [NYP] Read more on Gossip Roundup: Play Ball…
 

Gossip Roundup: Four More Years of Dick?

• Inside Politics: Gillespie complains to The New York Times: “[T]he White House would appreciate the opportunity to provide a fuller accounting of a two-way discussion.”. . . Woodward predicts Cheney versus Hillary in ’08. [WT] • Names & Faces: Sen. Lamar Alexander and Rep. Steny Hoyer honored for their support of musician’s rights. [WP] • Lloyd Grove’s Lowdown: Bush‘s nominee to be ambassador to the Netherlands led Ameriquest Capital, which is sponsoring the Rolling Stones tour. [NYDN] • Page Six: Bill Clinton to speak in Narragansett Bay, Rhode Island. [NYP] Read more on Gossip Roundup: Four More Years of Dick?…