Once upon a time, a Democrat and a Republican vied for the seat in the House of Representatives newly vacated by a gun-totin’ conservodem who turned into Senator Hillary Clinton. The individual contenders in this race did not matter so much, because national Democrats and Republicans got involved and suddenly it was a REFERENDUM ON CHANGE. Who would emerge the biggest loser, President Obama or RNC Chairman Michael Steele? MORE »

Today we celebrate a BELLWETHER ELECTION up in New York’s 20th Congressional District. Once a harmless gun nut named Kirsten Gillibrand held that seat, but then she became the poor man’s Hillary Clinton, so the voters in her district must now decide whether they will be led by a human named “Murphy” or a human named “Tedisco,” allegedly. MORE »

This Gillibrand character, the new fake Hillary Clinton, loves guns, which is fine. However, she recently revealed that she kept her two rifles under her bed, and once all the burglars in New York read in the paper where she kept her guns she had to move them so that they would not be stolen. MORE »

• The only people that like Obama at all anymore are a bunch of lazy illegals who wish they had jobs, and who, instead of just getting a job at a car plant or a Sam Goody (Not Bankrupt Yet! ™), hope that Obama can “create” jobs. Right. [RedState]
• Chuck Schumer will reprogram his new intern, Kirsten Gillibrand, as he pleases. He will start with her, hmm let’s see, political identifications and belief system. That should do it. [Ben Smith]
• About a dozen House Republicans are headed to Rahm Emanuel’s house tonight. House Republicans are known for their love of Kosher food. [CNN Political Ticker]
• When Obama took over Whitehouse.gov, he has prevented presidential historians from accessing such information of import as a video of First Dog Barney scurrying around Michael Phelps to the tune of “Ripple.” This is not change.gov we can believe in. [Daily Kos]
• Obama is secretly planning on giving the entirety of the stimulus bill to his old friends The ACORNs. [The Corner]

The Albany Times Union is pretty sure that Congresswoman Kirsten Gillibrand of New York will get David Paterson’s Senate appointment tomorrow after several painful months of catastrophe, ruin and embarrassment involving most of the Democratic party’s major dynasties. We are looking forward to never posting about this bullshit ever again, thank you. Sooo… Gillibrand, eh? Let’s see what we’ve got in the ol’ Wonkette Archives for “Gillibrand, Kirsten”…. MORE »

CONGRESSBABE HAS BABY, HOORAY: Some freshman member of Congress, Kirsten Gillibrand, popped out a kid this morning! And guess who’s healthy? The baby, the baby is healthy! Everyone make a mimosa right now. Aside from having babies, Gillibrand is famous for defeating the drunkest ex-Congressman ever in the 2006 election. [AP]

Freshman Congresswoman Kirsten Gillibrand announced this afternoon that she and her younger husband Jonathan (you go girl!) are expecting their second child in May. Gillibrand is 41 and the couple’s other child, who hopefully got her looks, is four, while her ecstatic husband is 38. Congratulations! [Albany Times Union]