Tag Archives: kenya

  energy in the news

French Nuclear Waste Dump Explodes, Kenyan Oil Pipeline Explodes

How is the world of energy going, today? Not so well! In the non-German, still-nuke-having European land of France, a nuclear waste dump in Marcoule exploded. At least one person is dead and several are injured and of course there is “no danger” until, like every recent nuclear disaster, the entire province is pronounced off limits to humanity for the next 10,000 years. (The Fox News-esque British deadpan comedy blog Daily Mail marks the explosion with the headline, “Marcoule explosion: Is the tide of anti-nuclear irrationality on the turn?”) And in Barack Obama’s socialist “Aloha State” of Kenya, a gigantic oil pipeline exploded in a heavily populated slum of Nairobi, killing at least a hundred. Read more on French Nuclear Waste Dump Explodes, Kenyan Oil Pipeline Explodes…
  and he burped on memorial day!

Fox News: Did Shameless Obama Chew Gum At Joplin Memorial?

Barack Obama has committed a lot of crimes such as being born, according to people who don’t like black men, but he finally went too far at this memorial for the people who got killed by the tornado. According to Fox News, the president sort of looked like he was moving his jaw in a way that could mean he was either chewing gum or trying to get his ears to pop after a flight or maybe he had something stuck in his teeth, who knows. In any case, why did they even let this guy in a church? Read more on Fox News: Did Shameless Obama Chew Gum At Joplin Memorial?…
  arghh matey

Obama Is Actually a Somali Pirate Child

Shocking new photographs from Barack Obama’s African Past reveal that he was actually a Somali pirate in Hawaii during his youth, the feared “Child Scallywag of Honolulu.” Here, pictured with Liz Phair in the early 1990s, the dread pirate O’bamar prepares to raid a British crown colony of landlubbers and then head off to the Indonesian pirate lair of “Singapore” to live under the Socialist doctrine of rum, sodomy and the lash. And even now that he’s “all growed up,” Barack Obama continues to welcome the various Pirate Kings to his mansion in Washington, where the terrible skull ‘n crossbones continues to fly beneath the disguise of “Old Glory.” Read more on Obama Is Actually a Somali Pirate Child…
  bachmann/robert e. lee 2012

Dave Weigel Proves Michele Bachmann Is Kenyan Idiot

Jabbering fucktard clownfish Michele Bachmann was one of the twelve or so teabaggers to “protest” in Washington today, by utterly failing to have a protest. But at least she posed with this sign announcing that she had escaped from Kenya, and that this strange white suburban wingnut village in Kenya was now missing its main idiot. Then Michele Bachmann walked into a tree and thanked George Washington for ending slavery and writing the bible, the end. [Dave Weigel’s Twitter thing] Read more on Dave Weigel Proves Michele Bachmann Is Kenyan Idiot…
  colonials

Mike Huckabee Knows Barack Obama Grew Up In Kenya

HUCKABEE: I would love to know more. What I know is troubling enough. And one thing that I do know is his having grown up in Kenya, his view of the Brits, for example, very different than the average American. When he gave the bust back to the Brits — Read more on Mike Huckabee Knows Barack Obama Grew Up In Kenya…
  it's hard out there for a president

White House Makes Sure Everyone Knows Obama Doesn’t Support That Crazy ‘Gay Marriage’ Idea

President Obama, like many people, was very happy that Proposition 8 was overturned yesterday. But no, that does not mean he supports gay marriage, David Axelrod says. “The president does oppose same-sex marriage, but he supports equality for gay and lesbian couples, and benefits and other issues, and that has been effectuated in federal agencies under his control.” Right. Read more on White House Makes Sure Everyone Knows Obama Doesn’t Support That Crazy ‘Gay Marriage’ Idea…
  sorry dude hawaii doesn't count either

Birthers’ Grand New Strategy: No Matter Where Obama Was Born, He Can’t Be President

As the election of America’s first “half-white” president nears its second anniversary, things still aren’t going that swell for the shrinking team of furious dingbats who hoped to sue Barack Obama out of the White House because his dad was an African black person. For two years, the teabaggers’ most prominent intellectual arm has waged a low-level courtroom war (mostly by email forwards) aimed at proving Barack Hussein Obama is not a citizen of America because he is a black person, and black people are — under the Original “O.G.” Constitution — simply slaves, worth only 3/5 of a normal fat white person, by body weight. Read more on Birthers’ Grand New Strategy: No Matter Where Obama Was Born, He Can’t Be President…
  where's your framing certificate obama?

Barack Obama Wrote Kenya an Abortion Constitution and Spent Lots of Money On It

When Barack Obama was born in Kenya 16 years ago, abortion wasn’t legal, so his parents weren’t able to get rid of their child. Jesus smiled, because he likes all babies, even socialist ones who want to destroy America. But now that ObaMao has illegally taken power in the U.S., he has decided to force a new constitution on Kenya that protects abortion, and our government is illegally spending money to get this passed, according to Fox News. Read more on Barack Obama Wrote Kenya an Abortion Constitution and Spent Lots of Money On It…
  president of kenya

Obama Sends Biden to Kenya With ‘Love’

As part of some big, expensive “diplomatic safari,” Joe Biden’s been chillin’ in Kenya, the birthplace of President Barry Hussein Soetero-Obama. In Nairobi, Biden gave a speech to some university students, telling jokes and complimenting a “beautiful woman” in the audience. Did he show them Obama’s Kenyanese birth certificate? Read more on Obama Sends Biden to Kenya With ‘Love’…
  make darrell issa cry

But Could Saint Ronald Reagan Possibly Be As Corrupt As Barack Obama?

Some communist somewhere is circulating this old AP newspaper clipping claiming that the sainted Reagan Administration did that thing that every political leadership has done since the Dawn of Politics, and frankly it’s insulting to the memory of The Gipper to even suggest his White House would’ve offered an ambassadorship or administration job to a Republican facing a tough GOP primary that could divide the base. Seriously, look at this news clipping and ask yourself, “Doesn’t this font look kind of funny?” Read more on But Could Saint Ronald Reagan Possibly Be As Corrupt As Barack Obama?…
  at least he made politico jokes

Fine, Here’s Your Barack Obama Comedy Routine

White House Correspondents’ Banquet! It was like a massive oil spill, but of shit, instead of oil. Last we heard from Jim Newell was at 12:44 a.m., by the way: “I am at msnbc afterparty. There are hamburgers and kc and the sunshine band are performing. It is epic.” Read more on Fine, Here’s Your Barack Obama Comedy Routine…
  humor is a weapon and radicals love weapons

Saul Alinsky Behind Latest Attack On Birthers

You know who was the very first human on the planet to use humor to serious effect? The 20th-century folk hero Saul Alinsky, inventor of community organizing and father of the Quercus genus of shade trees. Before Alinsky, no one ever thought to mock one’s political foes — and after Alinsky, no one ever did again. Read more on Saul Alinsky Behind Latest Attack On Birthers…
  cnn is birthers

OH YES, HERE IS THAT THING YOU ALL SENT TO YOUR WONKETTE: Did you know you can make your own magical Kenyan Birth Certificate, for anybody, by going to a website? Yes You Can! Email your version to CNN racist Lou Dobbs. [Kenyan Birth Certificate Generator] Read more on …
  he wuz hatched from a egg

Is Barack Obama A Secret Australian From The 1950s?

Assuming the president is even human, can anybody verify from which woman’s birth canal he sprang, and where, and when? The answer is no, until Barack Obama produces 1) a valid long-form birth certificate with coffee stains to make it look “real” and also 2) a 47-year-old mucus plug. (Note: do not Google “mucus plug” until after lunch.) But in lieu of this evidence, we are left to wonder whether Barack Obama was born in Kenya at all if somebody dug up a birth certificate from South Australia that looks SUSPICIOUSLY like his Kenyan one. Read more on Is Barack Obama A Secret Australian From The 1950s?…