keith olbermann

You know what the kids are into these days? They are into “the rap.” So here is a message of love about how buttsexing will send you to burn forever in hell.

Brace yourselves, guys. The crack team over at the Daily Caller has come out with a new, knuckle-cracking investigation that gets to the root of yet another broad liberal conspiracy: There is a guy on the internet, you see, who has… opinions. Oh, lord! Say it isn’t so! Say it’s a fabrication! No, I’m sorry. […]

What is this, unfolding before our delighted eyes? It is a SNAP. First Current TV totes fired Keith Olbermann for (ALLEGEDLY) being a glass-chucking work-shirking screamy freakout monster. Then Olbermann went on Letterman, called himself a “$10 million chandelier” (?) and sued Current and its execs for being “dilettantes” and playing make-believe, which are not […]

Sanctimonious screeching creep Keith Olbermann, whose ego isn’t the size of Jupiter but certainly is that of Jupiter’s largest moon, has been fired from his 757th job on television, for being horrible. Current TeeVee owner and other relatively liberal person Al Gore was the one who did the firing, in an explosive memo which arrived […]

Glenn Beck likes to be “relevant,” so he is probably thrilled that he won Keith Olbermann’s “Worst Persons” game yesterday. He did this by having his own teevee channel called “GBTV” which robs the old and paranoid of their retirement funds, through hypnosis and chalkboards, probably. We can’t say for sure because who would pay […]

Keith Olbermann is expected to announce his new teevee home base sometime today, and many teevee experts believe he will join Current TV, the “public affairs channel” that Al Gore invented to help spread liberal Sharia. And now that Keith isn’t oppressed by the MSNBC Corporate Yoke, he can finally tell the news the way […]

Now that MSNBC has said goodbye to its top draw, Keith Olbermann, the news network is looking to find a new marquee star for its growing brand, and sources tell me their ultimate wish list is topped by none other than ’30 Rock’ star Alec Baldwin. “He’s already part of the NBC family, has a […]

No. Shut up. Stop doing this. Nobody wants this.

Keith Olbermann did his last MSNBC teevee show! It was a big deal, probably! Was he fired? Were there contract squabbles? How much of his thirty million dollars does he get to keep? Will it be enough, for whatever? All across America tonight (in New York and Washington and Los Angeles, mostly), people who carry […]

Julian Assange has finally been released on bail, LADIEZ. Who wants to buy him some train tickets and condoms he may not use? All of you? Keith Olbermann? Yes. The man has a whole castle to himself, one full of rustic objects with which to hold you down, if that is your sort of thing. […]

Bristol Palin went on official Palin family blog “The Facebook” today to attack Keith Olbermann and rouse the pity of the conservative faithful, just as her mother would. Touching. Instead of using the standard teenager speak she and her sister usually employ on Facebook, however, she translated her message to Olbermann with some interesting selections […]

The fake-pearl wearing former-FLOTUS, Barbara Bush, likes to can her fetuses. Screeching moonbat Keith Olbermann got suspended from his show because heĀ  refused to apologize for being a screeching moonbat. The American wet-noodle party has yet to decide how often they will tongue-bathe John Boehner’s anus. Just like Narnia is an allegory for the baby […]

As we all know, Tucker Carlson owns keitholbermann.com, because Tucker Carlson likes to pretend he’s still a teevee pundit when he’s not pretending he’s a poor-man’s Dan Abrams, who’s a poor-man’s Nick Denton. What you may not know is that Tucker has set up an e-mail account, keith@keitholbermann.com, at this URL, so that Tucker can […]

Keith Olbermann is just the sort of guy who would break a network rule against making campaign contributions, and he’s also the sort of guy who would refuse to go on air to apologize to his viewers for such a thing, and apparently this is why his primetime MSNBC show is now an hour-long presentation […]

Barack Obama had a Very Tough Week, in that he was still the president and the first black chief executive of these United States and a hero to millions around the world and brilliant and handsome and also, fuck you, he gave you health insurance and saved your stupid auto industry. But whatevs, people in […]