For those of you who like terrible Keith Olbermann, because he was the “only television host to make you happy during the Bush Administration,” tomorrow’s your lucky night, according to this frightening press release: “NEW YORK – Oct. 6, 2009 – Tomorrow night on MSNBC’s ‘Countdown,’ Keith Olbermann will present a Special Comment for the full hour on the need for and meaning of health care reform in the United States. ‘Health Care Reform: The Fight Against Death’ will be a program-length Special Comment by Olbermann, in which he’ll propose group action by patients, and how patients can reclaim the debate over health care reform.” The patients’ group action will be to meet at someone’s house every night to watch Keith Olbermann. THE OUTRAGE!

L.A. TIMES TEEVEE LISTINGS COPY EDITOR TO BE ‘WORST PERSON IN THE WORLD’ EVERY NIGHT FOR THE NEXT YEAR: A correction from the print edition of today’s Los Angeles Times: “FOR THE RECORD: TV listings: The Prime-Time TV grid in Thursday’s Calendar section mistakenly listed MTV’s ‘Jackass’ show on the MSNBC cable schedule at 7 and 10 p.m. where instead MSNBC’s ‘Countdown With Keith Olbermann’ should have been listed.” THIS ES OUTRAGE! [LA Times]

Hmm, here’s a CRAZY rumor about Glenn Beck and his disappearance this week from Fox News. Nobody ever goes on “actual” vacation in August — except the French, that is — so where the hell is Glenn Beck, really? MORE »

• SOMEHOW THIS IS VERY OFFENSIVE TO TRIG PALIN AS WELL: Question: Why did Keith Olbermann let Richard Wolffe keep appearing as a guest commentator on his show four months after it became apparent that Wolffe is a known greaseball whore who will take money from literally anyone? Answer: How dare you ask that question, which is an insult to Keith Olbermann’s dead mother. [Gawker]

Here, watch this while the News Trolls come up with “actual reporting” for us to make fun of. Why was Stephen Colbert sending emails to Mark Sanford’s spokesman when he knows that Keith Olbermann’s mother recently died? The man has no shame. [The Colbert Report]

Remember when we posted that thing about an hour ago, about a CityFile report claiming Keith Olbermann missed his show for three nights because of some Rachel Maddow/Ben Affleck business? MSNBC just sent a DENIAL to your Wonkette, including a Prepared Statement from the teevee host. You will surely want to read it. MORE »

It’s time for the TeeVee Personality Newz here at Wonkette! In today’s first-and-only edition, Keith Olbermann acts like a jackass! According to New York’s CityFile, MSNBC’s “Wost Person in the World” stomped off the job for three nights because his pal and protege Rachel Maddow had movie star/Web traffic expert Ben Affleck booked for her April 16 show. But Olbermann decided Jennifer Garner’s husband needed to be on Olbermann’s April 16 show. When MSNBC executives refused to grant his wish, Keith stormed away and didn’t return to work until three shows later. MORE »

BEAUTY PAGEANT POLITICS: “During an appearance last week with MSNBC’s Keith Olbermann, Michael Musto jested that Miss California officials also paid for Carrie Prejean to ‘cut off her penis’ and likened her to Klaus Barbie, a Nazi war criminal believed to be responsible for up to 4,000 deaths.” [Fox News]

Here’s left-wing liberal Keith Olbermann gleefully delivering the breaking news that Dick Cheney has somehow destroyed his entire body moving boxes into his new CIA-gazing home. Cheney’s so massively dead right now that he will have to attend tomorrow’s Inauguration in a wheelchair. There is nothing — NOTHING — funny about this. It is SERIOUS. [YouTube]

Here is one of the only non-Palin SNL skits we’ve enjoyed in recent decades: Ben Affleck mocks the crap (however inaccurately) out of that self-righteous silvery fraud, Keith Olbermann, who some of you people inexplicably enjoy. Whatever. But we can all agree that he opens himself to some friendly mockery, right, and that he could be a team player about it when and if it does happen? Well, Olbermann is of course a parody of himself in real life and has responded angrily about the evil conservatives that are bribing NBC to BRING HIM DOWN. MORE »

Oh yes my friends, there is definitely a “JohnMcCain.com/Joe” site up and running now, and it’s a contest. How do you like that logo? It’s styled after a traditional blue collar name tag, for perhaps a set of overalls — a cute throwback to the 1950s, which was the last time America actually had blue collar jobs. MORE »