karl rove

What are America’s old white racist exurban cretins on Medicare and Social Security upset about today? Oh, the usual: Obama, liberals, gays, sex, black people, youth, hippies, the poor, the rich, Mexicans, “the hip hop,” Iran, exercise, unemployment, unemployment benefits, vegetables, a talented black woman with addiction problems such as Whitney Houston, organic farms, birth […]

Here is Karl Rove’s State of the Union drinking game, which has only one rule: the middle class makes Karl Rove want to puke when he hears it mentioned. The middle class makes Karl Rove so sick he can even skip the drinking and go right to the vomiting. “That doesn’t sound like much of […]

Hey, everyone remember that weird attack ad Karl Rove’s sweatshop of joyless video editor-slaves at Crossroads GPS slapped together a few weeks ago accusing Massachusetts Senate candidate Elizabeth Warren of hating “job creation” because she, um, sympathized with the concerns of the unemployed and Occupy Wall Street? Yeah, so: how well has this strategy worked […]

Thanksgiving hasn’t even happened yet and look, here already is a giant plate of half-putrefied “leftovers” to add to the compost bin: mutant overgrown toad wart Roger Ailes nearly (OH GOD, WHY NEARLY) evicted yammering reject Sarah Palin from his evil teevee space beams in an enraged fit right after she “announced” she was quitting […]

Returned dildo Karl Rove caught a case of one of these human microphones that are going around, this time courtesy of some rather mouthy students at Johns Hopkins University in Baltimore. Skip the first boring 1:30 and then marvel as Rove asks them, “Who gave you the right to occupy America? Nobody!” If you ignore […]

How do you prove you hate “job creation” in America? According to a new GOP commercial attacking Elizabeth Warren, you do this by expressing sympathy and support for the jobless Americans taking part in the Occupy protests nationwide. The ad was created by Karl Rove’s anus Crossroads Grassroots Policy Strategies, some wingnut consulting firm that […]

Herman Cain knows how to turn America into a vast nation of slobs who eat shitty take-out pizza (paid for with Social Security disability checks and Food Stamps) seven times a week. Why won’t Republicans make him the new president? Well for one thing, Herman Cain has a gang of radical homosexuals running his campaign. […]

Oh, look whose handlers discovered fish-eye lenses and sepia filters! Insipid reality teevee grandma Sarah Palin released another mind-numbing Internet home movie about signing autographs in Iowa to share, for whatever reason, who needs a reason? Rat-faced freak show Karl Rove excitedly predicts she released this video because she is finally planning to jump into the […]

Oh look, it is Karl Rove, who must have overdone it on the Quaaludes today because what is he saying, about there being different religions in this country, or people without any religion at all? Mostly he says he is offended because President Obama wrote something mean about him in his book, whatever. Here is […]

American taxpayers (China) paid for Bush administration officials to conduct political campaign activities for the 2006 midterm elections, which violated federal law and is information that, perhaps, we could have used somewhat earlier than a half decade after the fact. This is not surprising, nor is it surprising Karl Rove directed this stuff. What’s really […]

The Republican Party has taken a step back from their sweeping victory in America’s ultimate, #1, super repudiation of big government to wonder why, in fact, they didn’t take control of BOTH halves of our two-headed legislative branch; the answer to this conundrum can only be that Jim DeMint is a stupid face. Jim DeMint, […]

Every media personality and hologram agrees: Barack Obama was not reelected. He lost the election, sorry, goodbye! But who won? The easy answer is “America,” but don’t be rude: give credit where credit’s due! Scary Horror Stories won this election, and you could easily argue that Karl Rove’s piggy bank was also a big winner. […]

Because all Republican rhetoric is about how the ELITE represses the PEOPLE and we should always side with the PEOPLE against the ELITE and their SINISTER GOVERNMENT, you might think that America’s actual economic elite would be opposed to Republican policies. You would be wrong, though! For instance, over the course of this cycle rich […]

It’s morning and we still don’t know if President Obama is going to fire Stanley McChrystal for his whining or not! McChrystal already sent in his resignation, but Obama hasn’t decided whether to accept it or not. He’s probably doing that typical Obama thing where he’s carefully weighing his options and talking with subject matter […]

Fancy book-author Karl Rove went to Beverly Hills last night to take questions about his very very gay dad. But then Code Pink showed up to make a citizen’s arrest, and Karl had no security! Was he able to beat up these ladies good? Also, someone brings up the Downing Street Memo, which Rove calls […]