karl marx

PART 10: DID WE MENTION THAT THEY REALLY DON'T LIKE MARX?  11:00 am November 4, 2012

Sundays With The Christianists: This ‘World History’ Textbook Is The Opiate Of The Homeschooled Masses

by Doktor Zoom

Welcome, Comrades! We’re still making our way through the “we really don’t like communism” chapter of our 10th-grade textbook for Christian schools, World History and Cultures In Christian Perspective. So pour a nice glass of Victory Gin, hum the Internationale, and we’ll visit History’s Greatest Monsters, your Godless Commies. Now, last week, we found out [...]

PART 9: MARXY MARX & THE FUNDIE BUNCH  11:00 am October 28, 2012

Sundays With The Christianists: A ‘World History’ Textbook That Redistributes Reality To Home-Schooled Children

by Doktor Zoom

So now that we’re well into the nineteenth century with our hilarious 10th-grade textbook, World History and Cultures In Christian Perspective, we’re getting to some of the pivotal Bad Guys from the editors’ closetful of nightmare boogiemen. Last week it was Charles Darwin and a collection of terrifying Victorian philosophers who advocated such radical notions [...]

PART 8: SCIENCE MAKES EVERYTHING MUCH WORSE  12:00 pm October 21, 2012

Sundays With The Christianists: With This ‘World History’ Textbook, Your Homeschooled Babbies Will Not Evolve

by Doktor Zoom

It’s time for another visit to the funhouse mirror held up to history by our 10th-grade textbook for homeschoolers, World History and Cultures In Christian Perspective. If the Church of Rome was the textbook’s designated Big Bad for the period from Constantine through the Reformation, then history’s other greatest monster is Charles Darwin, who along [...]

IMPORTANT CULTURAL SIGNIFIERS  9:30 am March 22, 2010

A Children’s Treasury Of Terrifying Photos About Health Care!

by Sara K. Smith

Did you know that your precious Death Panel legislation includes a mandate to resurrect the corpse of Karl Marx thrice yearly, or else face a maximum penalty of one percent of your income plus ten minutes in a dark room with John Boehner? Look at the President chortling as he zaps Marx to life! He [...]

ZAT YOU SANTA CLAUS?  1:12 pm December 12, 2008

Santa Claus Palling Around With Marxists

by Ken Layne

Look at this creep, with his terrorist beard. His name is legion, or “Sinter Klass,” which means Karl Marx, because this is a photograph of the grave of the unrepentant Marxist, Karl Marx. Even his name is Marxist. An Australian person has written these words: “First, Father Christmas is a dead ringer for the Father [...]

SECRET COMMUNISTS  9:49 am October 30, 2008

by Sara K. Smith

SARAH THE MARXIST: She takes the oil companies’ hard-earned money and “redistributes” it to shiftless Alaskans! “[W]e’re set up, unlike other states in the union, where it’s collectively Alaskans own the resources. So we share in the wealth when the development of these resources occurs,” she told the elite socialist rag The New Yorker. That [...]

RUMORS ON THE INTERNETS  4:25 pm October 29, 2008

Illegal Robots, Illegal Bra Cash, Illegal Sunshine

by Juli Weiner

In the 90s, McCain gave thousands of dollars of Neiman Marcus gift certificates to fashion terrorist Rashid Khalidi. [Ezra Klein] This Mass. state senator accepted bribes from a swanky European-style discotheque called “Dejavu” in exchange for getting them a liquor license. Naturally, there are hotpixxx of her stuffing $1000 of this illicit ca$h into her [...]

NEW YORK TIMES  11:35 am April 14, 2008

Masterful Bill Kristol Pens Best Column Yet!

by Jim Newell


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