An evangelist named Dr. K.A. Paul, whom the New Republic has called the most popular evangelist in the world (read: has sodomized more little boys than the others), has shockingly endorsed the Muslin candidate, Barack Obama, in what must be an all-time first! This dude, who we will respectfully dub “The Other Dr. Paul” for the sake of LIBERTY! and FREEDOM!, offered three reasons for his endorsement: restoring America’s image abroad, eliminating the Bush/Republican economic policies, and punishing George W. Bush for his ineffectiveness in bringing about the second coming of Christ as the Bible had ordered him to do. As you can see, one of these reasons is insane on a COSMIC SCALE. What kind of drugs must this guy be on to think that the Bush economic policies have failed us?? MORE »

• WAKA is so yesterday. We want Freeze Tag, Four-Square and shaving cream Slip’ N Slide with this guy. [Ar-Jew-Tino]

• “People have genuine relationships, real friendships online…because you don’t have to see facial expressions.” Or open sores. [Literal Reality]
• Huck Finn 2006: “‘Ain’nosey. Only reas’n ah’sk is you don’ seem ta be carryn’ much.’ The hitchhiker doesn’t move. His stare remains fixed into the distance. Minutes go by -made of halting, interminable seconds–” [American Night]
• Review of last night’s Michael Ian Black/Michael Showalter comedy show. “Of course, I was standing directly next to this drunken douche who kept yelling out ‘Celebrity Poker.’” [The Upstate Life]
• 49,000 DC tenants evicted last year. Sadly, none of them were your lousy neighbors. [tls]
• The Senator adds a bit to yesterday’s Krazy K.A. Paul story: “he and Joe Trippi were going to change the country in the next 100 days. Maybe he said 10 months. I remember it being a function of 10, and that he was going to revolutionize America.” [The Gentlemen of the CPMC]

K.A. Paul update: MORE »

It’s time we introduced you to K.A. Paul, evangelist, minister, crazy person, and confidante to embattled House Speaker Dennis “Rockin’ in the Graveyard” Hastert. Here’s The New Republic: MORE »