JUDGE CLAY LAND WILL TAKE THAT $20,000, THANKS: Georgia’s “best judge ever,” the dry wit Clay Land, was *not kidding around at all* last month when he put insane Birther lawyer-dentist Orly Taitz on notice for frivolous litigation: “Finally fed up with Orly Taitz’s repeated frivolous and conspiracy-ridden filings in a Birther lawsuit, the judge in the case has fined the crusading attorney $20,000.” That’s more money than there is in the entire economy! [TPM Muckraker via Rumproast]

The latest escapade from “queen birther,” the esteemed dentist-lawyer Orly Taitz, is moving forward quite rapidly and is hilarious and hopefully there will be no more updates during the writing of this post because HOLD UP ONE SECOND, PLEASE, OKAY? MORE »

This is where we are with the Republican party right now: Barack Obama could appoint Ronald motherfucking Reagan and eight of his perfect clones to run the entire Supreme Court, and the right wing politicians and pundits would stand in firm opposition to this illegal Puerto Rican socialist community organizer Nazi faggot activist “Hollywood actor” and throw teabags at his grave. This nomination process is already hilarious, and we have several more months of it. Remember last week when Obama said he wanted “empathy” as a characteristic for his Supreme Court nominee, and how that word went over on the right, as soon as they dictionary.com’d it? They’re still going on about that, with two arguments: (1) even after dictionary.com-ing it, they still don’t know what it means and so it’s an evil liberal word, and (2) Hitler. MORE »

No, sickos, we are not going to reveal those photos on the front page of this FAMILY PUBLICATION. Instead we will show you a clip from Judge Alex Kozinski’s appearance on The Dating Game many moons ago, before he started amassing a collection of naughty pictures and viral videos that would shock all but the most seasoned readers of Mad magazine circa 1970. Sexy cow-lady photo after the jump. MORE »

The man pictured, a Mobile, Alabama Circuit Judge, “is accused of periodically removing prisoners from Mobile County Metro Jail and spanking them in a room at the courthouse.” With a paddle. The NAACP is defending him, but it’s surely only a matter of time before we find out he works for Giuliani or something. UPDATE: Well he’s pictured if you click on the top tag there. We’d fix it but Wonkette runs on software built by a trained seal and hosted on an Amiga somewhere in Hungary and we don’t know how anything works. [WKRG]

* The “100 hours” plan is dead before it begun, as Democrats will now focus on the “elephantine gorilla” that is Iraq. [WP]
* And by “focus on,” they mean, “do everything possible to stop a troop surge.” [WP]
* With little Wesley Clark doing his part too. [WP]
* Broadly written anti-terror laws are proving disastrous for asylum seekers, even Gary Bauer agrees. [WP]
* Chief Justice John Roberts is deeply troubled about the “constitutional crisis” of federal judges forced to mortgage their mansions. [WP]
* Joe Biden signs on to provide the comic relief for the Democratic Presidential primaries. [NYT]
* Charlie Rangel is all smiles about chairing Ways ‘n Means. [NYT]
* Frothy mouthed hordes of hot-pink fanny packers can’t wait to swarm the half billion-dollar Capitol visitor center. [NYT]

Cheer up, everyone — Tom DeLay may remain in Congress until the Earth collides with the sun, but at least we no longer have to fear for our safety when we cross him in dark alleys. As Reliable Source reports today, DeLay, whose concealed-weapons permit was revoked when he was charged with a felony, may be SOL: MORE »

Dear D.C. Superior Court Judge John Bayly, MORE »

* “Podfisking,” it’s all the rage. [Andrew Sullivan] MORE »

Forget Kansas — what’s the matter with Texas?

Most guys get in trouble for talking smack about their ex-girlfriends. But down in the Lone Star State, if you say a few nice things about your ex-girlfriend, you can get in trouble too. This is most likely to happen if you’re a judge, you said those things in 120 interviews with the media, and your ex-girlfriend was seeking an appointment to the U.S. Supreme Court at the time.

Remember Nathan L. Hecht, the Texas Supreme Court justice who rushed to the aid of his erstwhile paramour, White House Counsel Harriet Miers, during her disastrous SCOTUS nomination? Well, now he’s being dragged before the Texas State Commission on Judicial Conduct. The Commission is tsk-tsking him for trying to be a good ex-boyfriend, claiming that his public statements about Miers violated the Texas Code of Judicial Conduct, which forbids judges from “advanc[ing] the private interests of the judge or others.”

More details, after the jump.

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In a world of constant spin, it’s refreshing to come across someone who doesn’t even try. The Washington Post reports:

Two organizations that have provided free trips to hundreds of federal judges received large contributions from tobacco, oil and other corporate interests, according to documents released yesterday.

The Montana-based Foundation for Research on Economics and the Environment (FREE) and George Mason University’s Law & Economics Center previously said corporate money does not pay for the judges’ seminars or declined to disclose their donors.

But documents released by the Community Rights Counsel, a nonprofit Washington law firm, show that corporations including Exxon Mobil, Philip Morris and R.J. Reynolds Tobacco have contributed tens of thousands of dollars toward these programs.

How did FREE respond to this news? In surprisingly frank, unintentionally amusing fashion. Check it out, after the jump.

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