Tag Archives: journamalism

  Journalism is haaaaard

New York Times Sorry For Sucking At Journalism, Again

Sorry not sorry
Our esteemed newspaper of record told a riveting EXCLUSIVE! MUST CREDIT NEW YORK TIMES! tale last week about a criminal inquiry into Hillary Clinton’s mishandling of classified information with her personal email. And except for how it wasn’t about Clinton mishandling classified information, and the information wasn’t classified at the time, and the inquiry wasn’t criminal, it was all true! Which is why the Times quietly changed its story overnight to be slightly less inaccurate in its telling of this WHOA IF TRUE! story of Clinton criming while Clinton. And then it changed the story again. And then it published a “correction” about how the original headline and story were not exactly right, but it’s all good now, Pulitzers please! Read more on New York Times Sorry For Sucking At Journalism, Again…
  it's about ethics in gay-men journalism

Looks Like Gawker’s Got Some Job Openings, Y’all

Last week, the media-hijinks website Gawker made a wee oopsy. It posted a story about some guy — literally, just some guy — attempting to step out on his wife with a gay porn star who then tried to blackmail our hero. (It was not, bizarrely enough, an expose of the blackmailer but of the blackmailee.) The Internet responded poorly to the outing of a private person on the word of an extortionist with mental health issues, and after so much outcry, Gawker’s board of directors took the unprecedented step of removing the post from the web. It was long after the horse was out of the boxer briefs, but you do what you can. Now all the top editors are quitting their jobs at Gawker, and also losing their shit! It’s about editorial independence! And the right to out closeted married guys! Read more on Looks Like Gawker’s Got Some Job Openings, Y’all…
  Just what everyone needs

NRA: Know What Baltimore Needs? More Guns, So Everybody Can Stand Their Ground!

This would fix everything
With all of those people marching and looting and hip-hopping in the streets again, the National Rifle Association’s social media experts have teamed up with Still Dead Andrew Breitbart’s Cyber Tickle Fest For Insecure Neckbeards to tell America the HARD TRUTH about the rampant thuggery in Baltimore: Read more on NRA: Know What Baltimore Needs? More Guns, So Everybody Can Stand Their Ground!…
  Eyes On the Prez

NYT Deletes America’s Real President, George W. Bush, From Selma Photo

Don't you see the outrage?
Some Conservatweeters are very, very upset with the New York Times for a cover photo of Barack Obama at Saturday’s 50th anniversary commemoration of the 1965 civil rights march in Selma, Alabama. You see, the Times photographer, Doug Mills, had “cropped” his photo by focusing on President Barack Obama and Rep. John Lewis, instead of being a completely different photographer standing somewhere else and taking a completely different photograph with a wider angle that included former President George W. Bush: Read more on NYT Deletes America’s Real President, George W. Bush, From Selma Photo…
  department of grifting

Guys, Please Don’t Murder James O’Keefe

Look, we just don't want any rubber masked terrrorists getting in.
Raging garbage fire James O’Keefe has released another one of his fake videos, one that promises to be his most dangerous project yet, according to O’Keefe himself. Will he once again risk getting shot by the Border Patrol as he wades across a drainage ditch dressed in a thrown-together-at-the-last-minute Halloween costume? Cross Lake Erie from Canada into Cleveland with a bag of radioactive doughnuts from Tim Horton’s? What feats of derring-do will this intrepid daredevil undertake to get to the truth? Read more on Guys, Please Don’t Murder James O’Keefe…
  how a bill doesn't become a law

How All Your Favorite Liberal Blogs Muffed The Yoga Pants Bill (Which Does Not Exist)

Two mornings ago, our husband flagged for us a silly story about some dumb Montana derp farmer trying to outlaw “simulated” nudity. He flagged this story for one reason only: WHAT WOULD HAPPEN TO THE TRUCKNUTZ??? “Haha, poor TruckNutz,” said we, and threw it out to the hordes in the chatcave. Our executive editor, Kaili Joy Gray, wrote it up and that was that. “Dumb Montana derp farmer; simulated nudity; naked bicycle rides; the end.” Read more on How All Your Favorite Liberal Blogs Muffed The Yoga Pants Bill (Which Does Not Exist)…
  media circus

Inside The Collapse Of The New Yorker’s Inside The Collapse Of The New Republic

We haven’t had much — or anything? — to say about the mass hissyfit at The New Republic, because, honestly, how could we care? But that was before we read Ryan Lizza’s Inside the Collapse of The New Republic at the New Yorker, to which we could only sit at our kitchen table and moan OH SAVE US SWEET JESUS. Read more on Inside The Collapse Of The New Yorker’s Inside The Collapse Of The New Republic…
 

Andrea Mitchell Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things

Delete your account, NYT
Have you heard the story about the president who got a blowjob from a lady who wasn’t his wife? Sure you did. Because that blowjob would be old enough to drive a car by now, and lots of hack “journalists” cut their teeth typing out the scintillating details of semen stains and cigars. Which is why they are the one subspecies on this planet, and probably any other in the universe, that can never forget. The world marches on, a president leaves office, another one steals his seat, then another takes his place — but the Very Serious Journalists will never let go of The Blowjob. Read more on Andrea Mitchell Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things…
  good morning america

Good Lord Chuck Todd Is Bad At Talking To Humans

Chuck Todd is the greatest, most important political journalist of our time. But wouldn’t it be nice to see him display his softer side? The side that is able to talk to humans about real human things like procreation and gestation? Of course it would! NBC is no dummy! And that is why we get this delightfully luxurious video — as languidly paced as any Chabrol or Truffaut — of him chittin’ the ol’ chat with Savannah Guthrie, a human “mother” of a human “spawn.” Prepare for some Rosalind Russell/Cary Grant-style electric banter, two minutes that whip by like 12. Or, you know, not. Read more on Good Lord Chuck Todd Is Bad At Talking To Humans…
  Let It Go

Cool Robin Williams Story, Maureen Dowd

Maureen Dowd has been eating jazz cookies again. One time she met Robin Williams, which makes her think about her friend Michael Kelly, who later died covering the war in Iraq, and that’s why Hillary Clinton is a monster. Wait, what? Read more on Cool Robin Williams Story, Maureen Dowd…
  clipbait

John Oliver Now Doing Entire Segments For Andrew Sullivan

John Oliver got around to some pretty important stuff last night, if you are Andrew Sullivan. That important stuff was “native advertising,” also known by its old name, “advertorials,” which have been around since Steve Guttenberg invented the printing press. Read more on John Oliver Now Doing Entire Segments For Andrew Sullivan…
  Up and Down the Memory Hole

Let’s Play This Fun New Jennifer Rubin Game, ‘Game Of Lies’!

Jennifer Rubin, she’s this lady. Writes Mitt Romney fanfic for the Washington Post. Well, she did, anyway. Now she’s been reduced to a cutesy game where she steals the old Newsweek “Conventional Wisdom Watch” feature, with a series of “ups” and “downs,” except for how they’re all Jennifer Rubin reporting from her crotch. For instance, she is like “Up: My boner for Rick Perry,” and “Up: Unemployment rate (to 6.2 percent),” which, wow, that is some fucking balls. Read more on Let’s Play This Fun New Jennifer Rubin Game, ‘Game Of Lies’!…
  they're not racist the dictionary is racist

Now The Daily Caller Is Mad At The Dictionary For Calling It Racist

The Daily Caller — Tucker Carlson’s Internet home for upright citizens who love killing black children, and what on earth could be wrong with that? — googled the word “bigotry.” Why? Why do cows fart? Wrote Wonket BFF and Daily Caller scribe Betsy Rothstein, Google has an odd way of looking at “bigotry.” When you punch in the word “bigotry” into the Google search engine, here’s what you’ll find. Betsy then included a picture of a Google search result, which read, “bigoted attitudes; intolerance toward those who hold different opinions than oneself. ‘The report reveals racism and right-wing bigotry.'” Then Betsy had some questions! Interesting. Why is “right-wing” a correlation to bigotry? Why is bigotry a descriptor to “right-wing?” Then she answered them! The definition seems to come directly from the Oxford Dictionary, where the example sentence is used verbatim. HOW DARE THE DICTIONARY. Let’s do some more googling, for Betsy, and science! Read more on Now The Daily Caller Is Mad At The Dictionary For Calling It Racist…
  our liberal media

Laura Inghraham To Bring Her Special Blend Of Hate And Stupid To ABC News

Hissing hate module Laura Ingraham will be joining the roundtable on ABC’s This Week With George Stephanopoulos, apparently because they need someone who’s got the guts to celebrate the 50th anniversary of the March on Washington by cutting off a recording of a speech by John Lewis with the sound of a gunshot. Or maybe they need someone with a keen analytical mind that recognizes the uncanny parallels between Obamacare and standing in a car rental line. Or maybe she won the spot with her witty observation that Sonia Sotomayor prefers the term “undocumented immigrants” to “illegal aliens” because, as a Puerto Rican person, Sotomayor’s “allegiance obviously goes to her, you know, immigrant family background, not to the U.S. Constitution.” Beats us. Maybe Stephanopoulos just wants Ingraham to wear a red dress and sing “I like to be een A-mer-ee-ca!” Read more on Laura Inghraham To Bring Her Special Blend Of Hate And Stupid To ABC News…
  eat your vegetables

Your Daily Vegetables: Vox Is Here To Explainer At You ‘What Is Marijuana?’

Some time ago, wunderkind Ezra Klein (a “wunderkind” is from the German for “wonder” and “kind,” and means “a wonderfully kind person”) announced his wunderkind explainer website, Vox, and how it would explain and explain and explain and explain and explain. For some reason, this was considered more worthy of many millions of clams (“clams,” a slang term for “money,” is also known as “bread,” “loot,” “moolah,” “filthy lucre,” “whore diamonds” and “shekels,” if you are a racist) than was the “explanatory journalism” provided by our own DDM and Snipy, probably because DDM and Snipy just lie all the time. Klein explainered that, in newsrooms, important stories are often referred to as “the vegetables,” meaning “a thing you do not want,” which was a surprise to everyone who has ever worked in a newsroom, both because most newsrooms are not staffed by four-year-olds (in 1938, communist socialist Kenyan impostor Franklin Delano Roosevelt signed the “Fair Labor Act of 1938,” banning four-year-olds from performing dangerous work like “bantering with Rosalind Russell”), and because that is bullshit. Also, we would make a Terri Schiavo joke here, but we hate it when we get boycotted. (A “boycott” is a thing that is against the “law” when gay people do it, but is not against the “law,” as set forth in “the Constitution,” when non-gay people do it to your Wonket.) What are Ezra Klein and Vox explainering for us today? How about a little thing called “What is marijuana for $200, Alex?” Read more on Your Daily Vegetables: Vox Is Here To Explainer At You ‘What Is Marijuana?’…