Wonkette

Our Wonkette operative in Los Angeles writes: “Front page, scroll down to the quote area right above the video player, http://www.latimes.com.” Ha, dumb! [Opinion LA]

Dumb dumb dumb, dumb dumb dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb dumb dumb dumb dumb, dumb dumb dumb dumb. That is one “dumb” for each paragraph of Jonah Goldberg’s Los Angeles Times column today. For the record, we did not expect it to be “good,” in the traditional sense — we didn’t expect to read it at all! But 18 paragraphs of unmitigated “dumb” has a strangely magnetic appeal during this lazy news season. So let’s check out Jonah’s column, in which he argues that Obama’s plan to offer educational aid as a reward for national service is somehow both (a) welfare and (b) slavery. Europe, MTV, “the JFK cult,” and Rolling Stone magazine also play bit parts in Jonah’s remarkable paean to the God of Shit. MORE »

Hey everybody, have you heard of the hot new gadget called the “fax machine”? Apparently you can somehow send pieces of paper through the telephone wires, but you’ve got to really roll the paper up tight so it can fit! That’s what Jonah Goldberg thinks, anyway. MORE »

Responding quickly to something that was only on National Review Online and Wonkette, the Edwards campaign says John Edwards’ allegedly logical and unoffensive comment about a war between Israel and Iran being a threat to peace (because wars are generally considered the opposite of peace) most certainly was misreported by Variety’s Peter Bart last month. MORE »

The lovably ignorant right-wing pundit who’s memorized every Simpsons episode but probably couldn’t tell you the difference between Persians and Arabs made a little bet two years ago: MORE »

All photos by Liz Gorman, Hayekian Girl Reporter.

Last night, Wonkette schlepped down to the Heritage Foundation do shoot up and fuck our sisters listen to a debate on Libertarians versus Conservatives, with Jonah Goldberg of the National Review Online, and Nick Gillespie of Reason Magazine — and, this week, of Wonkette, making us a bit biased. Quite a bit biased, actually, as we’ve learned time and time again that, our own rich-soaking tendencies aside, drinking with Libertarians always means a good, if poorly-remembered, time.

Full report, after the jump.

MORE »

Here’s a shamless plug (the very best kind): I’ll be debating National Review’s Jonah Goldberg tonight at D.C.’s Heritage Foundation tonight, on the very, very, very pressing issue of whether libertarians and conservatives can, like Rodney King and the LAPD, get along in the post-Cold War era the World War 3 era. The boozing begins at 6:30PM, the debate at 7PM, and the Brokeback Mountain-style hijinks will be going on all day (this is the Heritage Foundation, after all). MORE »

• If it weren’t for the fact that he irritates the hell out of us too, we’d be applauding Adam Carolla right now. [C&L]

• “Ms. Coulter knows when attribution is appropriate, as underscored by the nineteen pages of hundreds of endnotes contained in Godless.” Well, we’re relieved. Everyone knows endnotes = accountability. There’s a Nabokov novel along those lines, right? [Media Matters]
• “It seems an obvious point to me that flying space Marines would be a valuable contribution to the arsenal of democracy.” — Johnah Goldberg, who is on tv sometimes and everything. [The Corner]
• Explosion in limo liberal enclave blamed on neighborhood’s only Republican. [Gawker]
• Best news of the week. [Althouse]

* Jonah Goldberg really wants some holographic technology, ’cause regular internet porn just isn’t doing it for him any more. [The National Review] MORE »

You came through again, everyone. This week’s sightings are all over both the map and the stratified Washington hierarchy. Helen Thomas apparently likes to eat with the kewl kids, even if she’s just gumming it. Kevin Nealon, Newt Gingrich, and Marion Barry pull some nice trim. Ted Koppelhas a death wish. Morgan Spurlock keeps trying to supersize his career and Tom Friedman’s mustache of wisdom has nothing to do with Napoleon.

A whole rack more, as standard, after the jump.

Please don’t forget that Wonk’d is entirely tipster driven. So when you spot someone famous out there, make a note in your PDA, ’cause you’ll have other hazy memories to sort through in the morning. Once you feel that reminder buzzing you, email us here, with “Wonk’d” or “Sighting” in the subject line (along with the name of the celeb that you saw). Thanks!

And speaking of sights to see: YES, we are aware of the frightening photos of Katherine Harris “getting her cougar on” with a cute young college journalist. We will be blogging about them shortly.

MORE »