CPAC-ing Heat: Wonkette Gets Drunk With Right-Wingers
Monday, February 13th, 2006
Last week, from Thursday, February 9, through Saturday, February 11, conservative political activists from around the country descended upon Washington for the annual Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC). And the Wonkette Welcome Wagon was there to meet them!
Okay, we kinda missed all of the panels, speeches, and events. We didn’t get to hear Ann Coulter rail against “ragheads,” and we missed the mob-scene book signings by blogebrities Glenn Reynolds and Michelle Malkin. Nor did we attend the remarks of self-professed ex-gay Alan Chambers, who said sodomy was like fast food: “It will kill you.” Uh, not if you don’t swallow!
(Remember, boys and girls: as former President Clinton can tell you, the legal definition of sodomy encompasses a wide range of sexual acts. Black’s Law Dictionary defines sodomy as “oral or anal copulation between humans, or between humans and animals.” In other words, it’s not just assfucking!)
We don’t look that drunk, do we? (Photo by the Boi From Troy, blogging at our too-cool-for-school sibling.)
Sorry for that scholarly digression. Although we missed CPAC’s substantive presentations — if Ann Coulter mocking John Kerry as the other “dominant woman in American politics” qualifies as “substantive” — we did show up for the most important part: the drinking!
A chronicle of our misadventures, after the jump.
Last week, from Thursday, February 9, through Saturday, February 11, conservative political activists from around the country descended upon Washington for the annual Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC). And the Wonkette Welcome Wagon was there to meet them!
Okay, we kinda missed all of the panels, speeches, and events. We didn’t get to hear Ann Coulter rail against “ragheads,” and we missed the mob-scene book signings by blogebrities Glenn Reynolds and Michelle Malkin. Nor did we attend the remarks of self-professed ex-gay Alan Chambers, who said sodomy was like fast food: “It will kill you.” Uh, not if you don’t swallow!
(Remember, boys and girls: as former President Clinton can tell you, the legal definition of sodomy encompasses a wide range of sexual acts. Black’s Law Dictionary defines sodomy as “oral or anal copulation between humans, or between humans and animals.” In other words, it’s not just assfucking!)
We don’t look that drunk, do we? (Photo by the Boi From Troy, blogging at our too-cool-for-school sibling.)
Sorry for that scholarly digression. Although we missed CPAC’s substantive presentations — if Ann Coulter mocking John Kerry as the other “dominant woman in American politics” qualifies as “substantive” — we did show up for the most important part: the drinking!
A chronicle of our misadventures, after the jump.
