Tag Archives: john mccain

  the commentczar's in town

Deleted Comments: Why Do You Liberals Care If Druggies Die?

Scootaloo is a skateboard punk rocker. Let's hope she ends up saner than Michelle Shocked.
We’ve got a heapin’ helpin’ of hostility for you this week, on any number of topics, so let’s jump right into it with this one-liner from “Boggy,” who posted it this week in reply to our June piece on Ted Cruz’s classy jokes about Joe Biden, four days after the death of Biden’s son Beau: Read more on Deleted Comments: Why Do You Liberals Care If Druggies Die?…
  Breathtaking!

Donald Trump Has YOOOOOOGE, Beautiful Plan To Elect Hillary Clinton President

Now you can have an authentic Donald Trump experience in your own home
Recently, Donald “I am Donald Trump!” Trump had to reassure everyone that no, he is not a secret Democratic operative, playing in the GOP primary for the purposes of making all the other candidates eat each other alive and just look dumb. OR IS HE? Well maybe he has changed his mind on the subject, because the RNC is being mean to him and saying things like “Hey, stop calling the Mexicans rapists, stop punching John McCain in the face, and also you are an asshole,” which is NOT part of Trump’s plan to Make America Great Again, so maybe if they keep being such bitches he’ll run third party: Read more on Donald Trump Has YOOOOOOGE, Beautiful Plan To Elect Hillary Clinton President…
  makes perfect sense

Senate GOP Screwing Lady Veterans Out Of Having Babies, Because Planned Parenthood

No babies for vets until they save all the babies!
Oooooh, Senate Republicans are SO mad! Turns out there is a thing called Planned Parenthood, it does healthcare to ladies, including abortion healthcare, and absolutely nothing — NOTHING! — is more important than putting a stop to that right now. Not even our veterans, who are all heroes, every single one of them, but most especially Sen. John McCain, even if he is a RINO. And definitely not our lady veterans, who want to have babies. Sorry ladies, you’ll just have to wait until the GOP saves all the babies first. Read more on Senate GOP Screwing Lady Veterans Out Of Having Babies, Because Planned Parenthood…
  Ooh he mad!

Dumb Rick Perry To Dumb Donald Trump: MEEEEEE-OW! SCRATCH! HISS!

We're guessing Perry looked a bit like this delivering his remarks.
Guess former Texas governor and current GOP clown car rumble seat occupant Rick Perry doesn’t like being called the second biggest stupid in the world, just behind Sen. Lindsey Graham. In a speech delivered Wednesday to some cohort of idiots assembled by his super PAC, Perry thought he’d set the record straight on who is the real idiot, and also who is destroying the Republican Party, and also who is literal ass cancer embodied in human Republican form. Surprise, it is Donald Trump! Read more on Dumb Rick Perry To Dumb Donald Trump: MEEEEEE-OW! SCRATCH! HISS!…
  U go gurl

Donald Trump Would Agree Lindsey Graham Smashing His Phone To Sounds Of Vivaldi Is CLASSY

Macho macho man
Remember yesterday, when Donald Trump decided to do the weirdest campaign speech in the history of weird campaign speeches, by talking about how Lindsey Graham is even stupider than dumb Rick Perry, which is saying a lot, and regaled the crowd with a story about how Graham begged him one time to give him money and say nice things about him on the “Fox & Friends” program? And then he gave out Graham’s cell phone number and told everybody to prank call it? Of course you remember, it was yesterday! Later in the day, Graham tweeted that he was probably going to have to get a new phone and we were like LOL does he not understand how phone numbers work? Read more on Donald Trump Would Agree Lindsey Graham Smashing His Phone To Sounds Of Vivaldi Is CLASSY…
  This is just a really good apology

Donald Trump Sorry Everyone Too Stupid To Understand John McCain Is Big War Hero Loser

Sorry you're dumb.
Watch the latest video at video.foxnews.comBy now you know how smegma-encrusted weasel-trap Donald Trump said John McCain is one BIG pussy, and that he’s only a war hero because he was captured, and that he prefers people who didn’t get captured, and now everybody and their mother hates Donald Trump, except for all the Republican assholes who find this endearing somehow. Well, Trump would like to apologize. Excuse us, Trump would like to “apologize,” for you being so stupid that you didn’t understand what he said the first time. He explained this to known war correspondent Bill O’Reilly, who asked Trump to say something “man to man” to John McCain, like they would do if they were going to have a barfight, or maybe about to do Brokeback Mountain-style sex on each other: Read more on Donald Trump Sorry Everyone Too Stupid To Understand John McCain Is Big War Hero Loser…
  You're The Real Haters

Donald Trump Winning Because Plenty Of Republicans Like Loudmouthed Dickheads

So McCain was captured. Big deal. So was El Chapo.
Donald Trump is at the very top of the latest Washington Post-ABC News poll, with 24 percent of Republican-leaning voters preferring the rubber-faced buttplug over the other primary candidates. His closest rivals, Scott Walker and Jeb! Bush, are virtually tied with 13 and 12 percent support (and a margin of error of 3 to 5 percentage points). And we know why this is. It is because Republican primary voters are A Idiot, as Sean Hannity astutely observed on his radio program Monday. Read more on Donald Trump Winning Because Plenty Of Republicans Like Loudmouthed Dickheads…
  Basically like Jesus

Donald Trump YOOOOGE Fan Of God And Those Little Jesus Crackers

Donald Trump, good Christian
We have been so busy LOLing and WTFing over Donald Trump’s attack on John McCain for being a fake war hero, with his weak-assed POWing, because Trump “like[s] people that weren’t captured,” that we almost forgot to tell you some of the other hilarity of Trump’s weekend. Almost. Read more on Donald Trump YOOOOGE Fan Of God And Those Little Jesus Crackers…
  all of them katie

How Many Fox News Anchors Does It Take To Give Donald Trump A Rimjob?

S-M-R-T.
The answer is A LOT. Which makes sense, because Donald Trump’s butthole isn’t weak like the other candidates’ buttholes, and it’s definitely not a captured POW loser like John McCain’s butthole. Trump had a big weekend, and he probably put the nail in his own coffin by saying mean things about McCain — some of which are KINDA true, except for how Donald Trump is an asshole who doesn’t know how to string words together without coming off like a ginormous cowering pussy, and who also doesn’t really have a place to talk about others’ Vietnam War records, since the only bravery Trump exhibited during that time was in the number of bullshit deferments he managed to get. Oh wait, that wasn’t “brave,” that was “brazen,” and also “cowardly.” Read more on How Many Fox News Anchors Does It Take To Give Donald Trump A Rimjob?…
  Yes we are entertained

John McCain Graciously Refuses To Tell Donald Trump To F*ck Himself In The Ear

Not a good day to be John McCain
Did you hear the one about how Donald Trump thinks John McCain is a L-O-S-E-R for getting captured and held as a prisoner of war that one time, in the Nam, for five and a half years? Of course you did, because we, along with the rest of the entire US of A, can’t stop talking about it. Read more on John McCain Graciously Refuses To Tell Donald Trump To F*ck Himself In The Ear…
  Four And A Half Weeks Alan

Donald Trump Can’t Believe People Don’t Like His Straight Talk On Loser POWs

So McCain was captured. Big deal. So was El Chapo.
Just in case you hadn’t heard about Donald Trump’s very special weekend shitshow, he had a terrible horrible no-good very bad Saturday at the Family Leadership Summit in Ames, Iowa, where he made the mistake of talking smack about somebody other than Mexicans. In a Q & A with emcee Frank Luntz, Trump went after John McCain on the one thing Republicans do not want anyone questioning: his status as an honest-to-god “Five And A Half Years, Alan” war hero. Read more on Donald Trump Can’t Believe People Don’t Like His Straight Talk On Loser POWs…
  Here have some news n stuff

All Of U.S. America Was A Total Sh*t Show, How Was Your Weekend?

Oh sorry, it's not
So. It is work o’clock, Monday morning, and you’re eco-commuting to your job and sipping your vegan free trade zen tea, made with real zen, and scrolling through your iDevice to find out hmm, did anything of import happen this weekend? Because maybe you were not on the interwebs; instead, you were taking the kids to soccer practice, or perhaps drinking alone with your cat, or downing some hair of the dog with your sunglasses on — inside. Not that we’re judging. Read more on All Of U.S. America Was A Total Sh*t Show, How Was Your Weekend?…
  I know you is but what are I?

Stupid Donald Trump Says Rick Perry Is The Real Stupid

You're both a idiot
Don’t you just love the smell of stupids catfighting in the morning? Here is Gov. Rick Perry, trying to bitch-slap the guy who is currently kicking his ass so hard, Perry might not even scrape his way into the first Republican primary debate of “real” contenders (hahahahahahahaha, REAL CONTENDERS): Read more on Stupid Donald Trump Says Rick Perry Is The Real Stupid…
  the commentczar's in town

Deleted Comments Of The Week: Was It Over When The Jews Bombed Pearl Harbor?

Hey, Kids, hope you enjoyed both your Fourth of July and your Independence Day, seeing as how this was one of those years where they fall on the same day. Yr Wonkette had a nice day off and hardly blowed up anything at all that didn’t need ‘splodin’. And speaking of “highly Flammable,” we have for you a fine collection of deleted dumbth, starting with some thoughts from a “Dr. Lopez,” who we regret did not specify what his doctorate was in. Dr Lopez was not especially pleased with our piece on the Texas attorney general who issued an amazing public meltdown in the form of a press release following the Supreme Court’s gay marriage ruling. And Dr. Lopez had some thoughts about just what a Big Dummy our Evan Hurst must be — don’t be fooled by his flattery at the beginning! As always, punctuation and spelling are verbatim from original. Read more on Deleted Comments Of The Week: Was It Over When The Jews Bombed Pearl Harbor?…
  Wonkette dance party

Here’s A Jaunty Gay-Hatin’ Campaign Song For Republicans, Since They Can’t Use Any Others

Republican creative type.
Republican candidates have this problem every single time they try to do campaigns. They think, “Hey, I have always loved that song by [insert artist here], I’ll use that!” And then they get a cease-and-desist letter, or a lawsuit, from the artist, saying “I hate you so much, you are not worthy of my song, you dirty disgusting wingnut.” It happened last week, when dumb Donald Trump thought it would be a good idea to use Neil Young’s “Rockin’ In The Free World” during his campaign announcement. No dice, Donald. But there is hope on the horizon! Read more on Here’s A Jaunty Gay-Hatin’ Campaign Song For Republicans, Since They Can’t Use Any Others…