john mccain
During Iowa’s caucus coverage Tuesday night, some time around thirteen o’clock, in between the 98th and 99th time Wolf Blitzer assured us that “we’re watching this vee-ee-ery closely,” a message flashed on the screen that Senator John McCain, former thingy, plans to endorse Mitt Romney as the GOP nominee. Turns out McCain has no respect [...]
Uh-oh, why is John McCain insulting 9/11? Don’t tell us our favorite celebrity political couple John McCain and 9/11 have finally broken up! (Calm down, Lindsey Graham, that is not actually what happened.) No, John McCain jokingly insulted Long Island during a Senate debate by saying that it is “regrettably” part of America, and Chuck [...]
Good news, everyone! Ever since launching major foreign invasions got a little too expensive and pointless (mostly expensive) even for Congress, and Times Are Tough, our nations’ lawmakers have decided to start “focusing on the domestic issues” like everyone keeps asking them to do, ad nauseum. But since it is impossible for Congress to agree [...]
We’ll probably do more on this shortly, but for the moment: one can only imagine the quantity of wet Depends flying around the McLieberHamBiscuits team offices in celebration right now — crazy old murderous dictator Muammar Qaddafi is super duper dead as a door nail after NTC fighters found him hiding in a drainage pipe. Yes, [...]
Oh boohoo, Meghan McCain is furious because mean old troll Erick Erickson’s right-wing website RedState.com posted some kind of half-wit parody of Meghan McCain’s vapid Daily Beast columns that her lawyers say too closely resembles her actual half-wit columns to count as satire. The original post has been taken down, but the full version of [...]
It’s the last day of summer, everybody! Technically, anyway. Summer has been extended by a few years for many parts of the United States, especially Texas. But you know what else is important about this day before the Autumn Equinox? It’s the birthday of fictional hobbit celebrities Bilbo Baggins and Frodo Baggins, both born on [...]
Aging lesbian power couple John McCain and Lindsey Graham are excited to hear about what appears to be the final collapse of the Qaddafi regime in Libya, although Sartorial Satan is still in hiding and Tripoli is not yet under full rebel control. Team McHamBiscuits nonetheless have an important nonsense neoconservative reflection on the whole saga: [...]
Oh God, John McCain, he is getting more senile by the hour. Somebody handed Walnuts a copy of the Wall Street Journal, which, in the paper’s effort to fill all of its blank pages with words about anything besides disgraced overlord owner Rupert Murdoch, said let’s type words comparing Tea Party people to hobbits. Uh, [...]
What do we always know about America’s myriad unsolved problems? They are the fault of the illegalz. Recently, the illegalz have been trying to burn down all of Arizona with their chronic pyromaniac ruthlessness, according to senior desert wildfire detective Sen. John McCain. Asked by reporters at a press conference, “what’s the deal and how [...]
According to the Obama administration, there are no American “boots” on the ground in Libya. But there are American orthopedic dress shows on the ground in Libya. John McCain latched onto one of our predator drones and parachuted down into the country Friday because he loves U.S. intervention in foreign wars so much he had [...]
