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john hawkins

AND HUMBLE TOO  12:40 pm September 27, 2012

Romney Website: Mitt Romney Just Cold Saving People’s Lives Right And Left

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

Did you know Mitt Romney once saved a 14-year-old girl’s LIFE? He did that by going to look for her after she disappeared. Even though he did not actually find her. And she was just sleeping off an Ecstasy binge. But no, Mitt Romney is like Ryan Gosling times Morrissey plus Superman minus Kryptonite. Mitt [...]

THIS ONE'S FOR THE LADIES  5:26 pm June 21, 2012

Here Are The Hottest Conservative Men To Judge The 20 Hottest Conservative Women

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

It seems like only this afternoon that we were gazing in awe and wonder on the cartoon peepers (and maybe a little tits and ass) of the 20 hottest chicks in conservative media. How do the men in the office all manage to get any work done, are we right bros? Hubba hubba hubba bork [...]

URGENT MATTERS  3:10 pm June 21, 2012

Right Wing News Ends War On Women With Peaceful List of Hottest Conservative Women in Media

by Liz Colville

The point of women is to stand tall, butt pointing just so (say, eastward), bosom pointing just the opposite so (westward). The point of conservative women in the media is to do this, plus tell conservative men everywhere what they obviously already know, and invented, like that Obama is a Kenyan spy, but which they [...]


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