It is well known in Republican circles that anyone comparing Barack Obama to former German senator Adolf Hitler is secretly a black Democrat ‘plant,’ in a union. This includes Rush Limbaugh and Glenn Beck, but only during those times that they are saying Barack Obama loves Hitler and vice versa. How much does Barack Obama’s union, “Organizing for America,” pay these fat slobs to say or “imply” these things in public, to make anti-health care people “come across” as insane? No one knows. (Five blowjobs.) But today we learned, on the Internet, that Obama’s fraudulent plant-reach extends even further, to the mainstream Democrats known as “LaRouchies,” who comprise a solid 87 percent of the American left. MORE »

Henry Wax Man, Man of Wax: as chairman of the House Oversight Committee, he has basically subpeonaed the entire Bush administration and asked them why they all suck so much. Henry Waxman rules! And now he will be taking his brand of California liberal ass-kickery to the Energy and Commerce Committee, where he just ousted the tragic Detroit toady John Dingell as chairman. MORE »

* Reliable Source: Jenna Bush spotted at Glover Park Starbucks sporting “cute new chin-length do” and “teal houndstooth coat”. . . NPR’s Sylvia Poggioli says “Oh, shit!” on the air. . . Bradley Whitford says his “West Wing” character will “spend the day naked in bed with a woman”. . . Rep. John Dingell is now the second longest-serving House member of all time. [WP]
* Rush & Molloy: Clinton comments on Cheney: “They raise the quail on a farm. It’s hardly a sport. The quail are slow. You have to stomp on the ground to get them to get up and fly. And you can’t not get your limit. If it was that kind of farm, then, whatever the facts are, the Vice President shouldn’t have done that. Because he was going to get his limit.”. . . George Lucas suggests Cheney is secretly controlling Bush. [NYDN]
* Lloyd Grove’s Lowdown: Sen. Joe Biden (D-Del.): “Part of [Bush's] persona is his alcoholism. I have alcoholics in my family. They’re lucky to have an epiphany, and life begins at that epiphany. I think life began for George W. Bush at age 40.” [NYDN]

* Reliable Source: After much anticipation — namely by Amy Argetsinger and Roxanne Roberts — Sen. John McCain made his cameo halfway through last night’s “24″. . . Scheduler for Sen. Jeff Sessions has been “dealt with” following post of “provocative photo” online. . . Jordan’s King Abdullah spotted at Georgetown Safeway. [WP]
* Under the Dome: Brian Williams confused Sen. Barak Obama with Rep. Harold Ford during State of the Union broadcast. . . Rep. John Conyers (D-Mich.) hawks hardcover version of “The Constitution in Crisis” report with a introduction by Joe Wilson. . . Colin Powell sings “Happy Birthday” to opera singer. . . Liam Neeson and Holly Hunter play the Lincolns in Library of Congress production. [The Hill]
* Inside the Beltway: Rep. John Dingell (D-Mich.) is the longest-serving House member. [WT]

• Reliable Source: Scooter Libby met with lawyers at a cafe near Union Station, openly discussed the leak case, drank diet Dr Pepper, and purchased cookies. . . Bushes have lunch with Rep. John Dingell to celebrate his 50 years in Congress. [WP]
• Inside the Beltway: Bono changed Sen. Jesse Helms‘ views on AIDS. . . Terry McAuliffe’s book is titled “Bring it On!” [WT]
• Page Six: Maureen Dowd: “If there had been no Monica Lewinsky, there would have been no Sen. [Hillary] Clinton. She had to run as a victim because she was seen as so controlling”. . . Bill McCuddy of Fox News: “One of our makeup artists got Kofi Annan ready for a TV appearance at the U.N. the other day. Kind of embarrassing, when she told him the makeup was oil-based, out of habit he gave her food.”. . . Karl Rove, dining at 21 with Ken Mehlman, devours beef tenderloin. . . Hillary Clinton’s deputy state director, Tyson Pratcher, will run for Harold Ford’s congressional seat [NYP, NYP]
• Cindy Adams: Jeanine Pirro expected to run for attorney general instead of the senate. [NYP]
• The Scoop: Viggo Mortensen: “I

• Reliable Source: Advisors to Kathleen Babineaux Blanco had their own concerns about the Louisiana governor’s wardrobe during the Katrina aftermath. . . Bush twins spotted “in fancy tops and jeans, dining on sushi, scallops and sea bass at Oya with eight other gals” on Friday night. . . Clay Aiken checked into the Madison Hotel under the name Jimmy Carter. . . Dr. Phil seen at Georgetown Haagen-Dazs. [WP]
• Under the Dome: House debate turns disorderly. . . Rep. John Dingell (D-Mich.) celebrates 50 years in Congress today. . . Michael Chertoff sees “Syriana” in Georgetown. [The Hill]
• Lloyd Grove’s Lowdown: John Kerry wines and dines about three dozen former campaign staffers. Chris Heinz, meanwhile, may run for Congress. [NYDN]
• Fox 411: Al Gore hosts screening of Tommy Lee Jones‘ new film, recalls reading the Bible with former college roommate. [Fox News]

• Reliable Source: Angelina Jolie proves a distraction at Capitol Hill conference on HIV/AIDS. Richard Branson also testifies: “If this were the U.S., there would be a war room set up.”. . . Lynne Cheney visits and revisits Pottery Barn. . . Connie Mack (R-Fl.) is divorcing. [WP]
• Under the Dome: Five Hall of Fame baseball players dragged out to talk about steroid legislation. . . Letter from two Democrat lawmakers regarding Plan B may have influenced FDA commissioner to resign. . . John Dingell (D-Mich.), Mark Foley (R-Fla.), Pat Roberts, ABC’s John Cochran, Howard Fineman, Matt Cooper, and Ben Bradlee attend screening of “Flightplan” hosted by Dan Glickman. [The Hill]
• Inside the Beltway: Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) agents found themselves hounded for ice by confused hurricane victims. [WT]
• Lloyd Grove’s Lowdown: Gloria Steinem says ‘08 is too soon for Hillary. [NYDN]
• Rush & Molloy: Ari Fleischer is working for Bud Selig. [NYDN]