Tag: john cornyn

Anthony Weiner’s Dick Explodes All Over Hillary Clinton’s Emails

A Children's Treasury Of Folks Wondering What The Hell Kinda Stunt James Comey's Trying To Pull Here

Senate So Mad At Obama For Letting Them Override His Veto Of Their Piss-Ignorant Bill. No. Really.

If Obama doesn't want a bill to pass, he should support it, damn him.

Senate Republicans Vote To Send Thoughts And Prayers To Future Mass Shooting Victims

What, you wanted background checks and stuff like that? Are you some kind of Communist?
Free kitten with every five mass shootings

Adorable Senate Prepares To Pretend To ‘Do Something’ About Guns, Isn’t That Sweet?

Oh good, the Senate is finally going to appear to do something about guns, and then fail. Then we can go back to having our real gun laws dictated to the states by the NRA, as the Founders intended.

GOP To Hold Its Breath Until It Turns Blue, Or Until Hillary Wins White House

As promised, Oval-Office-thiever-in-chief Barry B. Bamz O'Baby YoMama nominated a perfectly reasonable and qualified white dude to fill the vacancy on the Supreme Court. As also promised, congressional Republicans took all of zero seconds to say "NO WAY, HOMBRE!" because "principles"...

Here Is Your Daily Affirmation That Republicans Are Dicks

We don't need any reminders that Republicans are the worst. Like, ever again. Seriously, we are all good with this lifetime supply already. Sadly, that doesn't stop them from jumping up and down and waving their hands in the air...

BREAKING: GOP Does Not Want To Work, Just Wants To Bang On Drum All Day

If you were just sitting around today wondering if Senate Republicans were going to think about doing their goddamn job on, well, anything really, wonder no more: they have indeed done something, which is to get together and take a vote...
I AM THE DUMMEST AND I BREATHE OUT OF MY MOUTH

Tom Cotton Screwing Up The One Good Thing Congress Might’ve Done This Year

Wow, it looks like Congress is actually going to accomplish something for once, on prison reform! Surely, no one can screw this one up for us, right? Ohhh, you sweet summer child. So who's here to rain on our happy...
Joan Crawford's Eyebrows for President

Carly Fiorina OK With Terrorists Buying Guns As Long As They Use Them Responsibly

Bless her corporation-wreckin' heart, Carly Fiorina does at least know two things for sure: 1) Terrorism Bad; and 2) NRA Good. Unfortunately, those two things sort of got all tangled up for her on Thursday's Morning Joe, when she...
When your only tool is a GE M134 Minigun, every problem looks like confetti

NRA-Lovin’ Texas Lawmaker Awful Worried Syrian Refugees Could Buy Guns

Here's a pleasant sidelight to the ongoing National Freakout Over Refugees. A Texas Republican state representative has thought of one more reason to keep Syrian refugees out of the Lone Star state: It's bad enough that they'll be able...
Things were a lot more carefree in WW II

Senate Republicans Love All Veterans Except Gay Kind

It's great to know how much Republicans love The Troops, as long as The Troops are about to go blow some stuff up somewhere and keep the world safe for whatever it is we're keeping safe this month. Once...
S-M-R-T

Ted Cruz Too Smart For Real Senate Rules, Prefers The Ones He Made Up

Let us never, ever forget that Sen. Ted Cruz is smarter than all of us put together. He was a member of the Constitutional Corroborators when he was just a wee lad in Texas, reciting the Constitution -- from...
Now the evil scheming begins

Loretta Lynch Is Finally Your New Attorney General, IMPEACH!

Well, that wasn't so hard! After waiting for a nearly record-setting 166 days to be confirmed, Loretta Lynch was finally sworn in as U.S. Attorney General by Vice President Joe Biden, who presumably saved his congratulatory groping for after...
Not the best font match, I'll admit

AFA Lady Sandy Rios: Why Waste Time On Dumb Fake ‘Sex Trafficking’ When We Should Be Stomping Out The Gay?

Sandy Rios, the American Patriarchy Association's "governmental affairs director," is not happy at all with the Republicans in the Senate this week, but not so much because they're holding up the confirmation of Loretta Lynch for the sake of...

GOP So Mad Obama Failed To Plan For GOP Destruction Of Obamacare

The other day we introduced you all to our new favorite people, the World Net Daily-style commenters recruited as plaintiffs in the latest Republican lawsuit to destroy Obamacare forever and ever. The case is called King v. Burwell, and...