john conyers
Michigan Rep. John Conyers Totally Trolls English-Only Hearings
John Conyers, how regularly you delight us! (Once, we sat next to the million-term Michigan Democrat at a recording industry handjob event, and could not wait to tell him about how we had read that the stupid TSA, post-9/11, was constantly pulling him out of line because of his bum ticker. “That’s Dingell,” he answered [...]
‘Ronald Reagan Impose Your Beliefs On A Woman’s Womb Act’ Will Never Be
Do you remember the surreal “Susan B. Anthony and Frederick Douglass Prenatal Nondiscrimination Act of 2011,” the bill written in high-pitched banshee shrieks and designed to stem a fictional tide of sex- and race-based abortions? Remember how no one in real life — NO ONE — could figure out how the hell, exactly, this law [...]
Here Is John Conyers On An Airplane Fapping To Playboy Magazine
Thanksgiving is an annual holiday of touching people’s genitals to celebrate the miracle of flight, so here’s a video that’s emerged of Rep. John Conyers of Detroit looking at a copy of Playboy on an airplane. And through the power of journalism, we know what pages the Judiciary Committee chairman cross-examined.
Grouchy Old John Conyers Mean To Visiting TeeVee Comic
Hey here is something about that thing everyone is pretending to be very excited about today: Rep. John Conyers was just cold being an asshole to Stephen Colbert, the television comic who was invited to testify on this agriculture issue specifically because it would get some attention for a “dry” subject (the field slavery of [...]
Beloved Detroit Icon Monica Conyers Faces 5 Years For Crooked Sludge Deal
Well, people of Detroit, it appears you did not pray hard enough for Monica Conyers, and now she may have to go to jail for a while. The Detroit City Council President Pro Tem and completely insane violent creep Mrs. Conyers, wife of US Representative John Conyers, pleaded guilty to conspiracy this morning in connection [...]
DEFIANT Karl Rove DEFIES Subpeona Again
John Conyers recently issued a subpeona requiring Karl Rove to appear before the House Judiciary Committee to talk about that whole attorney-firing scandal thing, and of course Karl Rove did not show up because what is he, a private citizen who is subject to the nation’s laws?
John Conyers Circulates HIT PIECE On Sexy Sanjay Gupta
As Mark Penn told us all during the Democratic primaries, it is an established socio-political fact that black people do not like brown people and vice-versa, because of Microtrends, and this is why Barack Obama cannot win 70% of the Hispanic vote. This scientific insight about wacky minorities is the only possible explanation for why [...]
WILL HE WEAR HIS ‘GOOD PANTS’?: “McClellan will testify publicly and under oath before the House Judiciary Committee on June 20 about the White House’s role in the leak and its response, his attorneys, Michael and Jane Tigar, said on Monday.” White House lawsuit in 3… 2… 1… [AP]
Perino: White House May, Uh, Not Necessarily, Well Maybe I Shouldn’t Say, Could Get In Trouble, Um, Er, Snarf, Destroy Scott McClellan
Now the thing about Scott McClellan is that he’s terrible, with his book, and he now may have tragically reopened the Valerie Plame “Plamegate” saga anew. John Conyers & Palz on the House Judiciary Committee are open to hearing McClellan’s testimony, meaning the White House will have to somehow stop him from testifying, meaning frozen [...]
Rep. John Conyers’ Councilwoman Wife Gets Sassy With Councilman
Rumors On The Internets: The Admirals Orientation Booklet Musclebound Specimen Said
You Know, You Can Look This Stuff Up, Guys
A Modest Proposal for Rep. John Conyers
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